11 month old transition to 1 nap (having read all the materials)

[stefwef]

At the end of June my daughter had this great schedule/routine:
6:30 wake
9:30 nap 1 - between 45min and 1 hr 15min
1:15 nap 2 - between 45 min and 1 hr 15min
7PM bedtime
Her total awake time was 12.5 and she was a happy alert kid all the time.

Then we went traveling in July and it all went wonky. However, after one month at home things are still totally crazy, and here are some new things:
1) nap shortenings: morning nap was 15min three times this week, and afternoon nap 30min three times (and did not happen three times - the remaining time of week I had her on me because I was so frustrated, and she slept 1hr 15min but then would not sleep at bedtime!)
2) nap refusal (usually afternoon nap, even if morning nap was just 30min). She either plays in her crib with her animals or cries for me. Last week she refused two afternoon naps, and again this afternoon. So that's three times in 7 days.
3) later and later bedtime. She will now go 5+hrs from wakeup of afternoon nap, even if said nap was only 30min after a 15min morning nap. So we've gone from a 7pm bedtime to 8:30 or later.
4) Night wakings. She easily wakes in the middle of the night (eg. if we don't do what she wants, like hold her) and will not go back down for HOURS. This is totally new to us. She's never done that before.
5) Multiple night wakings every 45min for first part of night (we think due to teething, though we are on day 2 of pu/pd training with some success)
6) Early wakeup (also think it's teething). Yesterday for first time she slept in her bed until 7AM, which I attribute to the pu/pd starting to work.
7) Appearing exhausted after 2 hours wake time in the AM - totally confounding her mom (As in, rolling all over the playmat floor and putting her head on stuffed animal like a pillow in her play "box") but won't fall asleep unless 3 hours have gone by (goofs around in her crib until then).

Also, since her night time sleep is smaller, she appears tired all day but will not sleep! I tried shortening awake times thinking she was OT but she still fights sleep! Don't know what to do!

I know I'm supposed to hold on to 2 naps as long as I can to avoid OT, but it looks like we have OT with two naps and no way to get her to nap more because the naps are pushing bedtime later and later but she's waking at same time more or less.  When I push the first A time the second nap does not happen. I tried one day on just one nap at 12:30 and she slept 1:15, which is way more than the 45min total I'm getting with two naps. All this to say - should I just go ahead and switch to one nap at 12:30 and keep her up all AM despite the total OT symptoms? She does 13hours with one 30min nap and a 6pm EBT, compared to 11hrs with two naps and a later 8pm bedtime...

Also she's cruising, standing on her own and we're waiting for that first step any day now.

Thank you!

[Layla]

All this to say - should I just go ahead and switch to one nap at 12:30 and keep her up all AM despite the total OT symptoms? She does 13hours with one 30min nap and a 6pm EBT, compared to 11hrs with two naps and a later 8pm bedtime...

It is a little on the young side but its not unheard of and if you're getting a decent nap out of her once a day, then maybe she's ready. I would start with a set nap at around 11.30-12pm and not later than that and see how you go 

[theu.s.lees]

I agree. Might as well give it a try. IMHO it can't get much worse, right? I feel like we are in the same boat. Not quite that extreme, but it started with BT refusal. Today we had am nap refusal so I ended up pushing it out and putting her down earlier than usual for her pm nap and just let her sleep. Then I just did an EBT as we are still working on longer A times.

Like I said, maybe try it out. If she seems really tired just keep focusing on keeping her distracted. It can help because they aren't necessarily tired, but just uncomfortable or frustrated from teething/trying to walk/etc. (At least that's how it is with S!).

[stefwef]

Thanks for the advice. I guess my one worry is that her WT are actually a LOT shorter than they used to be because she's more tired from all the cruising, but she's so used to the longer WTs that she refuses to sleep earlier. Is that a possibility? I just wonder because when I do break down and nurse her to sleep, it works... I feel like she should not fall asleep if she was not tired, no?

[theu.s.lees]

Again, I can't really give an opinion since I don't know what your day looks like. But I know that before I started BW M could always nurse to sleep no matter how tired he was or not. Nursing just has that effect. Have you checked out this link below? It has sample days for babies of various ages.

Sample EASY Routines from 0 - 13mths+

[weaver]

I feel like she should not fall asleep if she was not tired, no?

It's perfectly possible for her to be overtired and not be able to fall asleep. And I've certainly had babies who were so OT that all I could do to settle them was feed to sleep, they wouldn't settle otherwise.  Is that what you were asking?  Sorry if I've got the wrong end of the stick.

[stefwef]

Well, I mean she won't go down for her nap except for nursing at certain times, but if I wait an hour or two she will go down on her own. So I'm guessing the issue is UT not OT then. This baby just puzzles me because her attitude is SOOOO TIRED but then I have to wait hours for her to go down. We keep putting her to bed UT because she looks so OT! It drives me nuts!

[stefwef]

I did just one nap yesterday and it was just 1 hour long. She was SUPER SUPER tired before the nap, and also by bedtime which we did at 6, but then she would not go down until 6:45... and slept 12 hours!!! (the first time in MONTHS).

So I'm still confused - should I do what maximizes her total number of sleep hours (one nap, definitely), or should I do what makes her not look tired all day (two much shorter naps and a much later bedtime)?

Is it just that she needs to adjust to the new one nap schedule and just is a bit jetlagged? Should we try it a few more days in a row before we can tell?

Thank you!

[weaver]

Should we try it a few more days in a row before we can tell?

Anything new, unless it is very clearly a disaster!, you should try for three days or so and see how it settles.  It may be that her nap lengthens as she gets used to the new times. 

Has she always been low sleep needs?  Low sleep needs bubs do exist!

[pinkladyangel]

Hey hun.
Just seen your post and sounds like we're in the same boat.
Our lo is 2 weeks off his 1st birthday and since the middle if july we've been fighting the 2 -1 transition and i have to say its been pants. I go back to work tomorrow and need a routine to give my parents but havent had one to give. On saturday we bit the bullet and did the one nap. Sat evening/morning was awful but fingers crossed the plan is starting to come together. Last night was loads better and we even had a 7am wake up. I'm not saying we're there yet but i think we may be heading down the right path.
Our days and nights were one min ot the next ut and i guess we had nothing to lose by trying it and at the min days and night are better than they were.

[stefwef]

Yes, the lack of routine and set bedtime is definitely making both myself and LO bonkers!

We did three days on one nap but unfortunately our WTs were a little messed up because of the holiday/a wedding/visitors so I'm not sure it was the best of trials.
DAY 1: 4.75WT (seemed SOOOO tired by end of it!) / 1hr nap / 5.5WT / awesome night
DAY 2: 5.5WT (Ditto, even more so) / 1.5hr nap (but OT screaming in the middle) / 5.75WT / okay night
DAY 3: 5WT / 30min OT nap / 6.5 WT (kept refusing a PM catnap) / total OT EWU mess night

We're now back to 2 naps as we don't think she's quite ready.
DAY 4: 3.75WT / 30min nap (woke happy so not OT)  / trying for a PM nap after 3hrs to avoid OT but she's just rolling around goofing in her crib.

Now that our visitors and daddy are "gone", I will push her first AM wake time a little bit each day to see if we can get a 1hr nap again. I think she's the kind that will move her AM nap to be the new nap, as she's tossed the catnap for every nap transition (and mostly refused the catnap most days anyway.) Her morning naps have always been the longer naps.

Tomorrow we try 4hr first WT. I'm totally stumped on when she will take a second nap, as she's either UT or OT and absolutely no reliable sleep cues! Ditto when we put her down for bedtime my DH thinks she's UT and I think she's OT. It's such a puzzle!

Best of luck!

[pinkladyangel]

Bless ya and big hugs. Its so damn hard sometimes so know where your coming from.
we started with long am nap but he always refused catnap so ended up ot. After a few days trialing that we switched to capped am and long pm. That was ok for few days then started ew so capped am from 45 to 30 mins. Thats when big probs started. He was constantly grumpy so we went to the 1 nap. . We're on day 3 and not too bad have to Say.
I think its all about trial and error tbh. What works for one doesnt mean it works for others

[theu.s.lees]

Could you try for long am and then just an EBT? That's how we made the transition with both of ours. S didn't actually need to long of a BT as her nap was long enough and her A times long enough that she could still do a reasonable BT. But with M we had an am nap around 11 (in the beginning) and then a 6 pm BT, even 5:30 if it were a bit shorter of a nap. He usually tacked on at night so it balanced out okay.

But like was said before, stick with something for a few days to give her time to adjust. Part of the troubles would be to much variation over such a short time. She doesn't have any time to get settled into the routine.