Yawns are not always a reliable sleep cue - maybe baby just wants to do something else for a bit? It can signal the need for a change of scene, so maybe try some other gentle activity. I say that because it really strikes me that your wind-down is pretty long, and perhaps having that long of a wind-down means he isn't really getting the most out of activity time and hence is under-tired. Waking at 40/45 mins is generally a sign of under-tiredness, as is the refusal to go back to sleep
As for liking pats and not liking shushes, very normal, I would just adapt it to something he finds soothing - perhaps he doesn't want any noise, perhaps a hum, perhaps some very repetitive singing. My LO1 adored the classic sh-pat, LO2 wasn't interested, she liked a back rub and a hum. Feel free to adapt to something you find easy to repeat and control, reduce or increase as the situation warrants. I would generally not favour bouncing as it translate well for the older baby (ie you can't do it with them already in the crib, whereas sh-pat, rub-hum, you can).
Great to know he will nap so well in the carrier - if I were you, I would exploit that to your advantage!
