Encouraging Independent Sleep

[soulstar75]

I am looking for some suggestions on how to encourage independent sleep. My baby is 8 months and for naps, bedtime, and night wakings, I put him down in his crib drowsy but awake and shh pat to sleep. For naps, there is always some resistance. Night wakings can be hit or miss. Bed time is the easiest cause I nurse him to sleep. Am I on the right track? Ideally, I would love to put him down awake and walk away from the room. I do find that he has a very hard time self settling as well. I have tried waiting a few minutes before going in to get him to see if he can put himself back to sleep but no luck. He uses a dummy to sleep but not for too long. Thoughts? What has worked for you? Am I asking for too much from an 8 month old?

[newkidontheblock]

Hi there:)

We also started off with putting DD into her crib drowsy but awake. But we didn't shush/pat after that. We would lay her down & leave the room. If you feel he cannot settle that way, how about just sitting next to the crib or just laying a hand on him or using your voice to settle him - It's sleep time etc? Another thing DH does is potter around the room humming so DD knows he is there and is comfortable settling down for a nap.

However, the goal is to gradually intervene less and less. Since your LO is 8 months old, you could even try WI/WO. It could just be that you are responding too quickly. When you leave the room, does he start fussing or crying? Sometimes DD fusses for a bit and then just nods off.

Teaching independent sleep - methods

I hesitate to say this and disregard if you are comfortable as it is your choice but I would avoid nursing to sleep at bedtime. I nurse right before bed too but then I burp her, sing bedtime song and then lay her down. That way she is going to sleep completely independently and can easily settle herself at any night wakings (unless she is hungry or in some discomfort)

HTH!

[weaver]

Hi there,
good ideas from Fleur

I was going to add, if there is always resistance at nap time, then he might be UT.  Do you think he might be due an increase in A time?  Is it a while since he's had one?  If you go for an increase, just add 10-15mins and keep it at the new time for three-four days to see how he adjusts. 

As for waiting to see if he self-settles, the rule of thumb here is of course to listen carefully - if it's an 'I need you' cry go directly in, don't wait.  If he's just sort of talking to himself, let him continue for as long as he needs. 

Am I asking for too much from an 8 month old?

No it's certainly possible doesn't always happen mind you and definitely if his routine is off that won't help. I think you can't go wrong if you read that link Fleur gave you, and also listen to your baby.  He will always have periods of needing you more or less, and settling on his own is something he needs to learn with you helping him, so it can be a gradual thing, yk? 

[soulstar75]

Thanks for posting that link. I think the gradual process will work best. I don't know if he is going through a growth spurt or something but his A times have been all over the map these past few days. I'm working to increase it more so that he naps longer and isn't so resistant. I will also try letting him cry a bit longer before I go get him. Its usually a whimper and then it escalates so maybe I will try timing it to 5 mins and see. Im just feeling overwhelmed by this whole sleep thing and hoping it improves as I'm going to be returning to work soon. Thanks again!

[newkidontheblock]

Definitely respond when it escalates. Please don't time it before you go at that point. He needs to trust that you are there to help him. Hope things improve. Keep us posted