Prop

[Anika920]

Just curious if I am making this a prop. My LO 4mos is very active. He is starting to roll over so we need to get him out of the swaddle and I'm terrified! He already has multiple NW and he is still pretty jumpy and unfortunately gets very gassy which seems to make him uncomfortable. His little legs fly up vertical while he sleeps.

Anyhow, to WD I rock him. I get him very calm and drowsy and lay him down. I usually try for him to have his eyes open up for a few moments before he drifts off. Is this rocking to calm him down a prop? He can be so active and curious I just feel he needs some soothing before being plopped down. He isn't comforted by mom/dad just holding him at times and lately while being rocked he has even been crying and fighting us.

Here's what yesterday and today thus far looked like. Yesterday was a struggle all day!
A: 730
S: 910
A: 1040
S: 1230-1 1:30-2:30
A: 2:30
S: 400
A: 520
S: shooting for 7 fought dad until 8
(Not even going into NW, but there were 5!!)

Today
A: 730
S: 920 (20m unable to resettle)
A: 940
S: 11
A: 1230
S: 230 (fighting me since 145 still asleep now at 330)

[*foxy*]

Bump

[weaver]

Thanks for the bump Kate!

Anika,
I'm going to ask you to read up on the 4S sleep routine, so here's a link. 
What does a good wind down consist of (Includes 4S ritual)

I think your instinct is entirely right, in that you need you make a new soothing routine for him.  I think a wee bit of rocking is fine, but I would keep in mind that you want to phase that out, or minimise it at least.

Anyhow, to WD I rock him. I get him very calm and drowsy and lay him down. I usually try for him to have his eyes open up for a few moments before he drifts off.

Putting him down drowsy is perfect, and letting him settle in the cot sounds like it's going really really well.  I think you're doing great, maybe just to tweak the wind-down a little bit so that you don't create a prop, if you see what I mean.

[Anika920]

Thanks for the reply. I have been rocking him mostly because as soon as we start WD or even go in his room he is crying. It has been suggested that he is already OT but I really don't think that is it. I can walk out of his room and he stops crying. I've been saying for a while now. I think he genuinely just hates sleep! He has started to roll in inconsistently so we've had to take him out of the swaddle and that's seemed to really throw a wrench into things. He was doing really well falling asleep on his own after rocking for a couple days and in general getting good naps for a couple weeks up until the change.
With the 4S should I just hold him until he stops crying? I've modified getting him to sleep in his cot with PU/PD and shh/pat since he has been fighting sleeping in his crib. He's rolling around and looking like almost crying because he wiggles around so much. I've been doing this for about 24 hours now and so far seems to be going well to settle him and extend naps. However we are still having very frequent NW. These NW have been the downfall of my ability to be 100% consistent. He will wake anywhere from 45m to 2.5h on average about every 1.5 hours at night. I had him on reflux meds in the past, but he's a happy spitter so that's not the issue. He is also gaining well with wets and dirties so he's not hungry. It baffles me as to why we have so many NW and no real consistency with the length either. Sometimes after night feeding he'll wake after only a short time and (very rarely) will go 3 hours but more like 2-2.5

[Martini~]

Hi Hon! Anne is a bit ill so will try to help here.

1. Independent sleeping skills
- getting out of the swaddle means a lot and they usually need time to start sleeping well again, but it will happen, you just have to survive your LO to learn a new skill:)
- in general after 4mo, sleep is much more difficult and props are becoming more props than before; I would personally stop rocking at all - only for a wind down maybe, but not until drowsy stage, but just 3-4min before putting him down
- I would be consistent with what you do for naps - so combination of pupd and shh/pat, but remember to do it always, not only for naps but also for every resettle and every NW

2. long NW
- his routine seems to be a bit UT for his age; at 4mo you could be going towards 2 naps and 1 catnap and his average A should be around 2h; I remember that my LO's sleep needs dropped significantly around that age and he was fine sleeping 2.5-3h per day and 11.5h night
- at 4mo  there is a growth spurt and nasty sleep regression and sometimes no matter what happens, you just have to survive and ride it out; so I would say anything up to 10-14 days and it's still can be a regression.

HTH

[Anika920]

Thanks Martii

I have tried to pretty much cut out the rocking as it doesn't seem to calm him anyway, neither does the 4S. He starts fighting me. So, I have learned to move on and put him down. I realized that I may be putting him down too early as well, so thank you for noticing that. He does seem to show sleep cues pretty early for his first A time, but I do think he is ready to stay up longer. And I know I for sure am. Staying on short A times is rough.

Yesterday I was following the 3hr EASY and we had shorter naps (1.25h, 1h, 30m, 20m)  I only tried to extend the 3rd and that took over an hour, so I gave up. The day before we had two good 2hr naps and a decent catnap. That seemed to really work well for him!

I am following PU/PD with shh/pat in his crib for naps and NW. I feed on demand so I am not following a strict E schedule except at NW I am making him wait 3.5-4+ hours depending on when he wakes. He is still waking multiple times a night which makes it difficult to hold him out. Sometimes we will have 2 NW before it's time to nurse. But I've learned he doesn't nurse well if I try to nurse him too soon.

He has notoriously been a bad sleeper with random miracles of 3 or 4 hr stretches, so I have high hopes with getting him so good quality sleep soon!