Need some advice - 14 week old EASY

[hkrmom]

My LO is going to be 14 weeks at the end of this week. We've been struggling for weeks with 45 minute naps and I have tried to adjust A time upwards to correct (now at 1 hour and 45 minutes for the first A time).  But, we are still in the same boat and I'm wondering if I need to move to a 3.5 hr EASY? I've had her on a 3 hour easy, but we often end up feeding sooner because of the short naps, but she isn't always hungry and sometimes I end up splitting the feeding. 

I feel like I can't judge her cues well also. She often yawns right after waking up and rubs eyes, etc. throughout the time.   I don't know if I am keeping her up too long or not enough time.  Yesterday, after a 2 hour nap, she was falling asleep (eyes closed as I was walking around with her) by 1 hour and 20 minutes so I put her to bed.  I tried to extend her nap, but ended up being in the room with her for over an hour.  She woke at the 35 minute mark and thrashed around for about an hour and then slept 45 minutes.   Is there a reason she'd be so tired after a 2 hour nap? this seems to happen pretty often where she just seems so tired even after a good long nap first thing in the morning.

And, this morning, I'm at a loss because I heard her peep at 5:50, but then she was quiet until 6:30 (usually she makes lots of noises), so initially I thought she went back to sleep, but when I got her up, she was clearly tired - trying to doze while eating, rubbing eyes, super whiny, so I think she may have been "up" at 5:50, but I don't know.  I ended up putting her down after 1 hour and 45 minutes from 5:50, but am now worried she is going to nap only 45 minutes.  :/ 

I've not had great success extending naps in general so I usually get her up, but then we continue to fall into an OT by the end of the day routine.  I try to push her A times even after a 45 minute nap, but nothing seems to work.  Should I cut her A times after more than one 45 minute nap? By the end of the day, she is typically OT and I end up electing for an early bed time around 6:20/6:30 rather than 6:45/7.  She is STTN, but she's been waking up around 5:45 and I don't know what to do to push that back, if that is product of the early bed time?  How do I go about pushing that to 6:30/7?

Here is a recent day that was one of our better days because she took the late cat nap and could make it until the later bed time.  Often by the end of the day, she is so worn out, it is difficult to get her down for the cat nap.

wake - 555
E - 6
S 7:35 - 9:50
E 9:50
S - 11:30 - 12: 25
E - 12:30
S - 2 - 2:55
E - 3:30
S - 5:10 - 5:45 (in the baby bjorne)
E - 6:15
S - 7:05

Here is yesterday:
W - 5:45
E - 6:15
S - 7:30 - 9:25
E- 9:30
S - 10:50 (she was falling asleep), W 11:25, but resettle.  S 12:20 - 1:00
E - 1:10
S - 2:35 - 3:00
E - 3:45
S - 4:30 - 5
E - 6:10
S - 6:20

I would LOVE any advice because I'm driving myself crazy and am constantly worried that she is not sleeping well in the day time. She is generally in reasonable moods if she is being held, but when she gets tired, doesn't want to sit by herself.  I love that she is sleeping through the night, but want her to be happy in the day time too!

thank you!

[jessmum46]

I would guess some of those 2h naps are catch-ups from short nap days which is why she seems so sleepy afterwards.  That or if they happen after a shorter night she may be having a 'crash' nap where she sleep a long time but isn't fully rested from it.

In all honesty it's a rubbish age for naps.  Her A time is about right for age, I would just try to be consistent with it.  Maybe 15 mins less after a short nap and say 30 mins less towards the end of the day if all naps are short.  But it's probably just a case of waiting it out until she gets past this annoying stage.  EBT is a good plan.

Is she going to sleep independently yet?

[hkrmom]

She does put herself to sleep most of the time.  If she is overtired though, it's a different story and she needs lots of help. 

Do you think I need to switch to a 3.5 hr schedule, or just keep things as they are and continue to watch A times?  When do short naps usually work themselves out? I feel like we've been battling them for many weeks now...

[hkrmom]

One more question - is there any way to push her wake up time? Sometimes if I can get her to bed closer to 7 she sleeps until 6:45 or so, but most days she wakes around 5:50 or 6 and plays in her bed for a little bit..

[hkrmom]

Shoot I remembered one mor question.  When you say to be consistent, do you mean in cases where she seems tired (like after 2 hour nap sometimes) that I still use 1 hr 45 min A time? I haven't really been going off her cues because I've been trying to increase A time, but am never sure when I should use cues.

Thanks!

[wilow]

hugs. I don't have much advise for you. I do fight 45 minutes naps as well. My DS is fighting with sleep all together during the day and night. He was very good sleeper during the night not so much during the day but lately just not sleeping at all. Every nap is 45 minutes and then we have gap 3 hours A before night time as he refuses take cat nap :/ so by the evening he is overtired and does not fed and this causes night wakings as e is hungry so nightmare.... I wish to get some advise as well because I dont know what to do I dont sleep during the night and dont have possibility to rest during the day because I have 2 years old son as well.... 

[jessmum46]

Remember EASY is not a schedule and regardless of whether you were aiming for a 3.5h EASY or not you'd still be watching A times.  I find it much more helpful instead of focussing on 3h, 3.5h, 4h to focus on the EAS pattern.  So eat on waking, appropriate A time, ideally 1.5-2h nap, eat on waking, repeat....  So it may be 3h at some points in the day, 3.75 at others if you see what I mean.   The thing which makes the biggest difference is getting the right A time for your LO. 

Moving WU time may happen naturally as the routine stabilises a little, and if you get better naps you'll probably get a later BT and potentially a later WU that way.  How many hours night sleep is usual for you right now?

When I say consistent I think it helps when everything feels like a mess to just watch the clock and stick to the same A time.  Only then will you start to see patterns, and may also get a better sense of cues.  Maybe even make a couple of notes about your LO's mood and behaviour e.g. 'Seemed very tired 15 mins before nap, grumpy and yawning' followed by 30 minute nap suggests those may have been good tired cues and the nap ended up late and OT.  Similarly 'happy playing, chatted for 15 mins before settling' followed by 45 minute nap and chatty wake-up suggests UT.  Does that make sense?

Short naps don't last forever so hang in there xx

[hkrmom]

thanks so much!

LO usually gets around 11 - 12 hours at night right now.  Her bedtime is usually around 6:30 and she sleeps until 5:45 - 6 usually. 

the notes about mood definitely make sense.  I've been keeping a log for the past several weeks, but I am having a really hard time, mainly I think because all of her naps are short and that affects the A time so I dont really have a clear picture of what she needs outside of nap 1.  And even there, she has started to throw a wrench in the mix and has begun to wake in the middle of the nap, chat a little and then go back to sleep.  Is that a sign of UT?

thanks again - it's good to know the nap phase will pass, i really can't wait!

[wilow]

Hi
If I can ask question about naps as well. How do you manage the A time when baby is sleeping 20 minutes and doesn't resettle till feeding time so sometimes A time is already 1.5h. What do you do after feeding then put baby to sleep or keep awake ?? By the time I finish feeding him A time is 2hr after 20 minutes nap!! So he is quite tired and cannot fall asleep. I have this problem when I go for walk with buggy - he hates to sleep in pram or car seat, he sleeps pretty good in his basket. In the pram or car seat he only fall asleep for 20minutes that's is no more. No matter for how long I would be walking or driving. I need him to sleep sometimes in the cars seat because I need to drive with my older one to playschool in the morning and then I need to pick him up afternoon.

thanks for any advise.

[jessmum46]

A chat in the middle of the nap sounds like UT to me....I'd be tempted to push the A time a touch and see if that helps.  If not it may still be she is learning to transition cycles without waking fully.

After a short nap I would do a short A time, sleep and then feed on waking so EASASE.  But if you can't get the resettle or another nap, then maybe feed early and put down for a sleep when ready?  I wouldn't keep LO awake if clearly tired x