20 min naps

[SleepAtlas]

Just looking to get some advice/encouragement on the topic of naps.
We've been using the shush pay/ PUPD method along with EASY for 6 days now. Our 5 mo old was only sleeping on me or in the stroller for naps before this. Now he is able to go down in the crib with a bit of encouragement but after 20 mins he wakes up crying. We usually spend the rest of the nap time trying to get him to go down and he might do an extra 20 mins. After this the whole day feels like it is off because he is tired.I feel like I'm watching for his tired signs and getting him in his window, I do a 20 min wind down in his room, using black out curtains and a noise machine. What else should I be doing? So far I'm not getting much Y time 😢

[Bella89]

Hi there and welcome to BW forum!

I am so sorry to hear that you are having a hard time during this transition. It can be really hard on all of us.

From what you are saying it seems like you achieved a lot already by putting him down in a first place! Congrats on that!

Could you tell me more about how your day looks like? i.e.
7 WU,
7:30 E,
9:30 S...?

Is he BF or FF? DO you use pacifier?

From what I can tell you right now, is even for kids that don't use pacifier it is good to create a good sleeping environment for them, so they can feel safe:)
Maybe you could give him a teddy bear for sleep, a blanky or a muslin cloth to run his cheek against? What do you think?

Also, does he wake up crying? Do you try shush pat first and then pupd?

Sorry for a lot f questions;]

[SleepAtlas]

Hi! Thank you for your response

WU; 7... Sometimes we have to wake him and sometimes he wakes on his own.
E(BF) until 7:20
A; 7:20-8:40
we start our wind down around 8:40 aiming to have him in the crib at 9. Sometimes this is a smooth transition and sometimes it takes 30 mins to get him to sleep (he is crying at this point). I've been trying to be mindf of our A time because I feel like overstimulation was definitely part of our issue. We do both PUPD though that seems to escalate the crying so more often we do shush pay. I've been trying for months to give him a pack with no luck. His room is very dark and we use a rain machine as well. I have a little bunny cloth thing that I've been giving him to suck as he seems to want to but after I put him down on his back or side he flips himself over onto his stomach so I'm worried that anything in the crib could be dangerous. I've even tried waiting till he is in a deep sleep and pry it out of his hands but he wakes up  😬

So often I find myself sitting right by the crib to help lengthen his naps which is fine for now but not really ideal for the long term. Mommy'a gotta eat!

When he does wake early he is usually mantra crying to start and then escalating. It's very hard to get him back to sleep, sometimes it takes the remanider of the nap time and then I am at a loss as to whether I should keep him awake to follow our routine or put him down when he seems sleepy.

I appreciate your thoughts and feedback! I am very impressed with our results so far and just wondering how to tweet it a bit more. Much love!

[Bella89]

Hi,
I do not know how the rest of your day looks like, could you provide what happens after 9 am when he wakes up? It can help a lot to get the whole picture I think.

But to be honest with you, I think he needs a little more A time. Sometimes even if they seem tired, increasing that first, morning A time can get the just tired enough to take a good sleep.It can also shorten the whole falling asleep proccess. Look into here:
Average A times- BOOKMARK ME!
That being said, what if you moved that 8:40 to 8:45?
Question about WU 7am. Is there a reason you wake him up at 7? Family errands, walking kids to school etc?

Also, I would not advice you trying to resettle for more than 20 min. At this age it can irritate LO a lot and ofcourse after 40min of fighting sleep he will fall asleep. By giving him 20 min to fall asleep again you're sending a clear signal " Ok, I get the message. You don't want to sleep anymore." What I am trying to say is, if yuo see resettling is not working after 20 min just start another EASY cycle, but maybe wait with E a little.What do you think about it?

Lots of kids are tummy sleepers. As long as he can roll over back and forth, he is fine. But ofcourse, you know best, what you're comfortable with and feel safe with. If he likes the cloth that's good. There is nothing wrong in it. I would let it be to be honest. Try removing anything else from the crib that he doesn't pay attention to, extra toys, pillows, blankets. These are the most dangerous.

Let me know your thoughts

[SleepAtlas]

Well everyday is different based on how long he actually sleeps. I have been resetting his routine from the time he wakes up but trying to keep the E evenly spaced to every 3-4 hours. I was waking him at 7 as per the books recommendation, but the past couple of days I just let him sleep. He usually wakes at 6am and with a snack can go back to bed until 8. Here is today's schedule as an example.

Wu 8
E 8:20
A 8:30-10:15
S 10:20-10:50
A 11-1:20    E at11
S 1:40-2:10
A 2:20-4:30 E at 3
S 4:30-5:00
A 5:10-6
Bath 6-6:30
Bedtime routine 6:30-7 E at 7
Asleep at 7:15
 
Night time he wakes between 10-11 for a feed and then again around 2:30 and sometimes 5. This is a vast improvement over the past week... He was waking very 1-2 hours for awhile which is what led me to seek some advice.

I think the longer A time makes sense... I have been trying to catch him when he is in his sleep window which is anywhere from 2 to 2 1/4 hour after waking. I also agree that after 20 mins of trying I get him up rather than trying to extend the nap.

And I have given him his little bunny to sleep with, thanks for easing my worries about that.

Anything else you can see here? There are times when he will nap for longer stretches but usually no more than an hour.

I read appreciate your feedback!

[Buntybear]

Hi - have you tired going in at 15 mins and watches what happens ta the 20 minute mark? Have you heard of 'hold through the jolts' (HTTJ)? If you find he jolts at 20 minutes then you hold his arms gently down at his sides before the jolt and then when this does happen he is less likely to wake from them. It worked for us! Also being there to soothe at the 20 min mark but prevent him fully waking to crying x

[Bella89]

Hi there,
from what you've written down it all looks really good and appropriate to the age as well.
You seem to know what you're doing The key is consistency and paying attention to the baby.

About waking him up at 7... The book gives us a guideline to where the timings usually fall by themselves. Like where the LO's internal clock is. But every LO is different. I personally would love my DS to sleep until whenever, it could give me a break from 6am WU ;] I would never ever wake him up, but I have the time to give him.We don't have to get up. It's not like he would take it;] NS is also very important. There is a chance that he needs that time and will be OT quickly during that first A time. Just something to think about

I agree with my pp that it would be a good idea to watch him sleep to know why he is waking up. I would go with that for now.

Sorry I cannot be much of a help:/

[SleepAtlas]

So I think I figured it out! He just wants me to be his slave and not have any time to myself. Got it.

I put him down for his second nap today at 1:15 and after 15 mins went back in to see what he did. Around the 25-35 min mark he was stirring quite a bit but didn't wake up. I was strictly observing at this point. By 45 mins he was still again and at 50 mins I thought "hey! He's in his second cycle! I can safely leave and maybe go do something". So I come downstairs, make a cup of tea and pick up my book and BAM! He's awake. At 62 mins. The first time he sleeps more than 35 mins and I was in his room watching him like a sucker. Fml.

There is not enough chocolate in the world to make this day better.

[Bella89]

Am I not sensitive If I tell you that you made me laugh 
But I feel for you, I am serious now:)
Hey, he slept for the whole hour! That's great news:) 
Let's see what will happen tomorrow. SOmething tells me he won't make a full of you tomorrow:)

[SleepAtlas]

I'm glad you laughed... Some people don't understand my humour and then I end up looking like a jerk. 

Today he was textbook! WU at 6:45, nap at 9:20-10:35, nap at 1-2:20 and nap at 5-5:45. Asleep at 7:30. I actually had a shower AND a nap! What a turn around!

Thank you for all your advice! I'll be sure to write again when this all falls apart next week 

[Buntybear]

lol 

glad for the positive update!

[Bella89]

No problem
I'm here whenever you need me:)
Good luck!