Eliminating the pacifier for my 11 MO - your advice

[Palmira78]

My 11 MO is still having a number of NWs. When he wakes up, we go re-plug his pacifier and normally he immediately goes back to sleep (4 times a night). We know that it has become a sleeping prop, so we have decided to eliminate it this weekend for the nights. For naps in Day Care I asked them to stop giving it to him at the beginning of this week, and he has been sleeping for the last 4 days without the pacifier. I find it hard to believe... (I am considering to ask for the actual paci today and take it home with me) but they have such a strong sleeping cues, routines and of course, experience that they may have done it.

My DS's teacher told me that she stays next to him and caresses his belly until he fells asleep. This gives me some hope that it may be ok to do it for the nights, although I am dreading it a little, since it has become a part of our NWs routine :-(. I know that he can sleep without it, since he often fells asleep without it in the car or in the stroller... still I wonder how it is going to work. He only uses the pacifier for sleeping never during the day.

I do not want to introduce new "bad" habits to replace the paci-replug, so any advice would be very welcomed. I think that he is going to be angry when he realizes that we are not giving to him the paci during the night... and then I do not know what will be the plan, since I have tried the sssh / pat and it does not work with him.
Any ideas? should I play some music? Is PU/PD without moving my DS from the crib the answer? I fear that this is going to cause lots of tears, but I think that helping my DS to become a more independent sleeper is something good for him and for the family.
Any suggestions or comments regarding how to do it will be very much appreciated.

[barbaraz78]

Hi! Why do not teach him to replug independently instead? From 7 mo he should be able to do it. We encouraged it and he was fully independent with his paci since 7 mo to 3 yo, when he gave it up. To do this, we attached the paci to his lovely so it was easier for him to find and instead of replug, we would guide his hand to the paci (or we put the paci in his hand at the beginning) so he could replug. After some time, he understood how to find it in the night and put it back, often without even wake up.

[Palmira78]

Thanks Barbaraz78. I appreciate your advice, and I have already considered it but since the pacifier will have to be given up at some point I feel that it will be easier sooner than later. I am hesitant to make the effort to teach him to look for the paci now, and then later on, another struggle to stop using it once he has been very attached to it for years.

By the way, last night I wanted to start a trial just for BT and I placed my DS awake in the crib but this time without the paci on his mouth and after a minute of complaining, he move his face away and fell asleep on his own!! I only had to keep contact with him for a little while, my hand placed on his belly. It was amazing. He has slept better than other days although when he woke we still gave him the paci.

Tonight will be the first night with no paci whatsoever when he wakes up. Please wish me luck since braking the habit will be complicated. He is used to fall asleep when he wakes up during the night with us giving him the pacifier.... I hope that after this weekend he gets used to it.

[Palmira78]

This weekend we eliminated the pacifier, and I must say that it was easier than expected. We played the music, stroke his belly and he went back to sleep.
The good news is that we did not have lots of tears or long night wakes. The bad news is that he still woke up a lot.
Now that we have eliminated all the props and that we are re-settling our DS without pick-ups from the crib, lets see if we observe any improvement. We really need some rest...