15 month old never slept through the night - help really needed

[Birdofparadise]

Hi all,

I really hope you can shed some light/advice on this for me. Excuse the long post and apologies for my lack of accroynms. I'm a long time lurker of the site but first time posting.

Anyhow, my little boy is 15 months old in a few days. He has never slept through the night. Its was an issue last year while I was on mat leave, but i thought i could cope and he would grow out of it but he hasn't  and I am back at work 6 months now without any sleep its become pure torture. I don't feel i have the energy to enjoy my child anymore.

He daily pattern is:

Wake: 6.00 am
6.30/7.00  breakfast with water
8.30 in creche he gets a snack
9.30 Bottle 5oz
11.30 Lunch with water
12.00-14.00 nap (most days he sleeps 1.45 mins )
14.30 small snack
15.00 afternoon tea
16.00 bottle
17.00 Snack
17.30 dinner with water

6.30 bed time routine starts
he watches in the night garden while having his bottle.
7.00-7.30 brush his teeth, wash face and hands, change nappy and to pjs. bed time story and then ligths off and he goes in to the cot awake to fall alseep.
Some evenings there is protesting and I walk in out and out, and pat the pillow and shush him. Other nights he falls asleep no hassle at all all by himself.

he goes down most night quite easy to sleep, will generally sleep soundly from 7.30/8 - 11.15 p.m. from then on he can sometimes wake every 45 mins. Sometimes he'll just have a little cry and complain, other times its full on stand up screaming looking for me to settle and for a bottle.
He's waking anywhere between 3 - 11 time a night. I have done every type of training at this stage with the exception of CIO and the only one I have had a mild success with was the sleep lady shuffle method.

I weaned him off night feeds in October and kept up the sleep lady shuffle, we got 2 months out of this but his sleep pattern didn't improve. (lot illness etc over this time period so that didn't help). As  result I reverted back to giving him a night feed. I kept this to water for a few weeks but it got so bad that the only thing giving us a an hour or two respite is giving him milk. I give him 2 oz only at around 1.30 and then i hold off until 4.30 and 4 oz. I am slowly reducing this amount this week to get rid of the bottle altogether again. for the waking at 11.15 I am certain this habitual (this was his dream feed time) but nothing i have done has stopped this.


I am bringing him to the doctor this week for a once over to make sure there is nothing medically wrong with him and then I trying CIO. i didnt want to do this but its become necessary.
He a dote of child during the day. I can set my clock by him but the night wakings after the 11.15 one arent regular. I'm just at a loss as to what to do. people keep telling me maybe he just a child that doesn't sleep.

Any advice greatly appreciated. thanks

[Scottishmummy]

Hi & welcome to BW.

I'm sorry you're having such a sleepless time.  It is exhausting once back at work.

My first thought would be to work on stopping the NFs completely. I think while he could still get milk at night, he will still wake at night looking for it.

We often get a wake around 10/11 with both of mine (&shave never done a DF), I think it's just something to do with sleep patterns/transitions..or maybe disturbance of us going to bed around that time! How do you resettle at that wake up?

Getting checked by dr sounds like a good idea, just in cas of discomfort.

Only other thing I could suggest is looking at BT and BT routine.  6am-7.30/8pm is quite a long day at this age.  Have you ever tried an earlier BT e.g. Closer to 7pm? (sometimes NWs are from OT).

This might sound odd too, but my DS always found Night Garden a bit over stimulating, we didn't let him watch it as I was convinced it disturbed his ability to settle and disrupted his sleep. Have you considered a different WD activity e.g. Different programme or even just quiet activities like drawing, puzzles, books or music?

The BW forums discourage CIO and would suggest you try WI/WO instead as this approach still gives opportunity to self settle  (which may involve crying) but you go in again if cries escalate.  This might be an option to help wean off NFs.  When night weaning my DD I used WI/WO (or got my DH to go in!) & this helped a lot.
Toddlers: Walk In/Walk Out vs. The Gradual Withdrawal Method (HOW TO CHOOSE)

[Birdofparadise]

Hi thanks so much for your reply.

I'm really at my wits end and just feel there's something I'm missing when it comes to sleep training. 
I only mention CIO as very last ditch,  no other options thing to do. I don't like it,  I don't want to put him through I.

I'm working again this week to get rid of the NFs completely. I had done it previously and reverted to get some reprieve at night time. It'll be completely gone by Thursday.

In terms of resettling him,  we do WI/WO,  he doesn't like to be touched when trying  to sleep so lots of soft gentle encouragement and shushing. Ive tried for two weeks going up an hour earlier to gently  wake him to reset his sleep rhythm but to no effect. This wake time seems permanent.

I thought he might be OT,   we tried an earlier bed time starting his bed time routine at 6 and asleep by 7, it made things worse. I stuck it out for over a month to be certain, it completely unsettled him and neither I or creche could any good offer him during the day  he was really out of sorts. Also I only get in the door from work most nights at 6.30 so I get no time with him then. He would sobbing going to bed looking for more time with me. It was heart breaking.


I'll try eliminate in the night garden for a few while and see if it makes a difference,  it's more of background thing generally when he hears the music it triggers it's bottle time and he lies down in his travel cot and cuddles a teddy while I rub his feet. But no harm trying out something new. I'll do anything.   

[Scottishmummy]

It sounds like you've tried a lot of sensible stuff already.

Good luck with dropping NFs, I hope that makes a difference.

Sounds like he finds Night Garden relaxing rather than stimulating, if that's so, it seems a shame to disrupt his routine as it sounds lovely having that, cuddling teddy and getting a foot rub.

Not sure what else to suggest TBH

[Buntybear]

HI - You do seem to have a good day time routine for his age. I have to agree to work on those night feeds. Could you give him a bit of extra food before bedtime to keep his tummy fuller for longer? I remember around that age Olly had a growth spurt and I gave him some porridge or banana (or something filling) and that did seem to help a bit.