Took dummy away now we are in a mess

[Eva's Mummy]

Well I eventually bit the bullet and took dd2 dummy away. She is 2 years and 10 months old. That was 8 days and 9 nights ago and we are now in a big or mess.  She's gone from napping 1.5 hours or more every day and 12 hrs at night to 45 mins day time and 10.5 hours at night with multiple nw's where it takes hervages to go back to sleep or if it's near 5:30 She won't go back at all. She's been waking up a couple if hours after bed screaming, won't let anyone go near her and taking ages to calm down to let me settle her. Just like when she was an ot baby.  Today's nap she cried and cried for her dummy (She doesn't nirmally). But I think she's so tired she knows it will help her sleep.  I don't know what to do, dh thinks i shoukd her get her another dummy and try again when she's dripped her afternoon nap.  I don't know but we are all so tired.

[deb]

Why did you take it away? Was she waking for it?

My DD#2 was similar, in her case she WAS waking when it came out, but once she was able to re-plug on her own, we just bought her some extras. She gave it up on her own around 2.5YO for most of the day, took another couple months to get rid of it for sleep. She just had a REALLY REALLY strong need to suck, and a need for comfort. I still remember keeping a spare in my right-side pants pocket at all times from about 2-2/5YO for her.

If there isn't a real reason for her NOT to have it, I'd consider letting her have it back, at least for sleep times.

[Eva's Mummy]

I just thought she was getting too old for it. She never woke me wanting it just used it to get to sleep then it fell out. I think people just keep saying it's time to go but I might give her it back for sleep.  Do you think she will naturally just want rid of it on her own later x

[Roseii]

I would have never got rid of the dummy with a day time sleep- too precious! DD2 gave hers to the dummy fairy when she was over 3yo and it was no big deal at all.

[Shiv52]

If it was only for sleep times and nothing else then I'd have not got rid of it!!! I did with DD1 and she started to suck her thumb so I gave it back!  Then weaned with no issues when they were older.

[Katet]

I wanted to get rid of DS1's because I decided he was "too old"... after 2 sleeps that didn't work (with a baby in the mix) I decided it wasn't worth it. DS1 did get rid of it when he gave up his nap. I kind of think if they aren't asking for it during the day then why worry. One of the reasons I went to give it up was my Mum's judgement, but in a way it helped me realise that I shouldn't parent based on what other people think but on what my children need & it was quite a pivotal moment for me to have confidence to say "I know my child best & this is what I believe is right for them"

[twogirlsmommy]

With both my girls I had to stop the dummy. With dd1 it was her teeth and with dd2 it was because she was speech delayed and I was told that the dummy would not help that.  DD2 was around 2yrs when we took it away and we had about a month of off sleep (it was almost like resleep training only she was angry at me lol) and with dd1 we gave it to the dummy fairy and she cried once or twice for it and that was it.  That being said both my girls at age 8 and 4 respectively are still heavily attached to their loveys and their sleep friends (dd1 has about 5 friends plus a lovey plus a blankie that she WILL NOT sleep without) I honestly don't know if there wasn't a reason if I would have pushed the issue.

[deb]

Yes, teeth was the reason we did finally bite the bullet and push for the end of it with Natalie (and still we're doing orthodontics, but shorter term than many of her friends). But it was a LOT easier when she was old enough to understand why and to participate in the process. We didn't do a "paci fairy" as such, but we went first to only sleep times, and then she got to pick a substitute lovey when it was time to say goodbye for good.

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

DD3 will be 4 in a couple months and still uses her soother. I have suggested to her that maybe on her birthday we should send them to a baby who can use them but I will let her decide that. She only uses it for sleep now and never has it out of her room. She does have an issue saying "L" which I think is from the soother but is more an ingrained habit as she can say it if we practice but then she slips back into using "y" in place of "L". Our dentist could not even tell she uses a soother so it isn't always a dental concern. I would get her another one!

[Eva's Mummy]

Thank you all so much. I went out last night and got her 1. She ran straight upstairs and put it in her bed. She slept for 13 hours last night and 1hr 45 mins at nursery today with with a peep out if her.

I definitely feel the preasure everyone saying you should never give it back, I've just taken the easy way out. But info feel stringkt that she wasn't ready now it was more peer pressure making making me do it.  You ladies have made me feel so much better.

She did get angry today when I wouldn't let her take it out if bed but I think she's worried I'll take it away again.

The dentist has never mentioned her teeth, but when she was smaller she fell in the kitchen floor and chipped her front tooth and pushed her front 2 forward so that may need correcting when she's bigger because it all depends if her adult teeth are affected but he can't tell just now. 

It's amazing to see how much happier she is already just getting more sleep.

Like you said, I had made me realise I know my girl more than anyone else and won't be lead by peer pressure again

[Roseii]

Glad you got it sorted xx

[Katet]

It's easy to get caught up in the background noise of "don't give in" but the reality is in life it's about compromise and if our children see it's ok to make mistakes & change your mind then they learn from that too. It's great she's much happier already.
I found with my DS1 "you can have it when ever you like but you MUST stay in your room, meant he quickly lost interest in it outside sleep times.

[Eva's Mummy]

Thanks. That's actually a good idea saying she have it whenever she wants but she must stay in her room. Definitly going to try that xxx