7 week old napping help

[Dymondgirl]

Hi there

Hoping for some advice or guidance with my 7 week old DS and his naps. My DS is FF and we are on a 3.5-4hr EASY (tried 3hrly and he ended up vomiting all the milk cause it was too much). He is our second bub (DD is 3yo). We did BW with our DD with great success, and she still is an awesome sleeper, but I’m finding he is a bit different (e.g. he really seems to dislike SHH-pat whereas DD loved it) and he’s having to fit in a bit more around her. That said, i do have him to myself, without our toddler, 4 days a week.

He currently sleeps in the bassinet downstairs in our living room for day sleeps, and in a second bassinet in our room for night sleeps. Nights are pretty good, with a (v. roughly) 10.30pm feed and a 3am feed then up about 6am where i can resettle him until about 7, usually by bringing him into our bed (i know... another problem later to deal with  )

His EASY the other day looked like this

E 0345 straight back to sleep
E 0630
A 0650
S 0745 (slept for about 1hr, then resettled in my arms)   
E 1030
A 1050 (in car on way to shops) 
S 1130 (APOP in carrier at the shops with toddler) 
E 1500 
A 1520
S 1700 (OT from the long A time, struggled to even settle in my arms) 
A 1800 (bath and bedtime routine)
E 1815
S 1915 (OT screamed the whole time, needed dummy to help settle)
E 1030 (dream feed)

So, my questions are
1. His first nap of the day he will fall asleep by himself (no help needed from me) pretty consistently, but then will struggle staying asleep. He’s usually fully awake after 1hr of sleep. I can usually resettle him and hold him for the rest of his nap until his next feed.

• Should i keep holding him for his sleep, i’m Very worried about OT?
• Is there a way i can help him sleep longer in the bassinet?

Also, he takes a while to self settle, for example today i put him down at 0800 and he took 30mins to fall asleep, no crying just took time, and only slept for 30mins before he started whinging, so i’ve Popped the dummy in and that is sort of helping. So, his A time is usually more than 1h15min by the time he actually falls asleep.
2. After the first day nap, the sleeps get harder. He MAY self settle with a dummy (doesn’t need it to fall asleep for the morning sleep) for the second sleep, but again wont sleep in bassinet more than 1hr, sometimes less. This nap is the one i’m Often out in, so if he’s in his carrier he will sleep well, though he will still wake and need to resettle roughly every 40mins, even on me.

• Anything i can do to help him here?
• Am I creating really bad habits getting him to sleep in the carrier for this sleep, and I’m concerned about the days that we’re not out and getting him to sleep in his bassinet for this nap. Any advice?

3. The late arvo/evenings become the worst (typical i think) but i’m Worried its because he’s OT by now. The last few nights he gets really hard to get to sleep, even in my arms. He fusses and cries, and it usually takes a dummy, rocking and patting on the bum in my arms to get him to sleep. By then he’s usually been up for anywhere from 1hr30mins to 2hrs! He’ll have a 1hr-1hr30min nap in my arms, and then up for bed time routine of bath, bottle, bed. He spends this A time mostly upset and crying. Getting him to settle for his night sleep can take up to 40mins, although i usually do this one in his bassinet upstairs, with a dummy more often than not, as i have a toddler I need to feed and get ready for bed. This one i’m At a loss and is probably the most frustrating... any advice?

Sorry for the essay, just really wanted to get peoples advice and thoughts on how i can help him. I really only have a max of 4 days per week where i can invest long blocks of time getting him to sleep, as i have my toddler with me the other days and she needs me.

Thank you!!

[Dymondgirl]

Does anyone have any advice or thoughts on my post?

[becj86]

So sorry your post has been missed!

First off, your LO is very new to the world and most of what you're describing is really normal newborn baby sleep behaviour. He's getting used to being in the world.

Generally, your EAS looks ok, its a bit hard to tell when he woke up because I think you're not feeding upon wakeup with him needing feeds a bit further apart. That in turn makes A times really hard to decipher. The naps look quite long but I'm not sure so its hard to comment. Some of what you've written sounds like he might be waking up from that newborn sleepy phase.

1. His first nap of the day he will fall asleep by himself (no help needed from me) pretty consistently, but then will struggle staying asleep. He’s usually fully awake after 1hr of sleep. I can usually resettle him and hold him for the rest of his nap until his next feed. Should i keep holding him for his sleep, i’m Very worried about OT?Is there a way i can help him sleep longer in the bassinet?

If he's woken and he's happy, I wouldn't worry about trying to get him to keep sleeping. Feed in the middle of his next A time if necessary. I like to think of EASY as a bit like a sleep version of the division of responsibility for eating. You provide the opportunity to sleep at developmentally appropriate times with developmentally appropriate assistance to learn the skill and if this is done consistently, baby can take the sleep they need. I find that takes the pressure off a bit. If you were to give him a bit more A time, he might be more inclined to sleep longer for his nap.

Also, he takes a while to self settle, for example today i put him down at 0800 and he took 30mins to fall asleep, no crying just took time, and only slept for 30mins before he started whinging, so i’ve Popped the dummy in and that is sort of helping. So, his A time is usually more than 1h15min by the time he actually falls asleep.

It sounds like he's still not quite able to pick his own sleep window which is really normal at this age. If you put him down too early, he will be UT and will not fall asleep but then he'll get OT rather than falling asleep in his sleep window because he's not yet skilled enough at knowing when he feels tired enough for a sleep. This is tricky - obviously you're still not quite sure of his sleep window which will change with many variables so you will inevitably put him down UT and OT in the next weeks and months (and, lets face it, probably years). What you're teaching with shush/pat (or some other variation - like stroking his forehead and singing or whatever) is how to relax and get to sleep.

. After the first day nap, the sleeps get harder. He MAY self settle with a dummy (doesn’t need it to fall asleep for the morning sleep) for the second sleep, but again wont sleep in bassinet more than 1hr, sometimes less. This nap is the one i’m Often out in, so if he’s in his carrier he will sleep well, though he will still wake and need to resettle roughly every 40mins, even on me. Anything i can do to help him here?Am I creating really bad habits getting him to sleep in the carrier for this sleep, and I’m concerned about the days that we’re not out and getting him to sleep in his bassinet for this nap. Any advice?

Again, I'd like to reassure you that this is normal. Actually letting him sleep in places other than the bassinet is probably good for you in the future - if you have a baby who won't sleep anywhere but the bassinet, it can get very tricky when you do have to be out and about to live life. I'd suggest perhaps to mix it up so he's not learning that 'that specific nap happens in the carrier' but that 'naps happen in the carrier sometimes'. We all wake after a sleep cycle and go back to sleep - he's just learning how to do that and we don't notice it any more necessarily. Rousing every 40min is fine, its just the way their sleep cycles work.

3. The late arvo/evenings become the worst (typical i think) but i’m Worried its because he’s OT by now. The last few nights he gets really hard to get to sleep, even in my arms. He fusses and cries, and it usually takes a dummy, rocking and patting on the bum in my arms to get him to sleep. By then he’s usually been up for anywhere from 1hr30mins to 2hrs! He’ll have a 1hr-1hr30min nap in my arms, and then up for bed time routine of bath, bottle, bed. He spends this A time mostly upset and crying. Getting him to settle for his night sleep can take up to 40mins, although i usually do this one in his bassinet upstairs, with a dummy more often than not, as i have a toddler I need to feed and get ready for bed. This one i’m At a loss and is probably the most frustrating... any advice?

Yep, again, normal. Witching hour just is what it is. Probably enhanced for you because you've extra people in the house who are all interesting to LO and he is overstimulated. Tight hugs, long wind down away from the extra people (or with your other half), these are the sorts of things that can help. Perhaps having him in the carrier at this time might help.

I don't think you need to invest long blocks of time. I think the routine may need some tweaks but if you have a 7wo who can get himself to sleep after lying in bed for 30mins, things are looking pretty bright for you.