I feel so dumb asking this question...

[mom711baby]

but how long should I wait before I go into my daughter's room at night?  When she wakes at night, she fusses, she doesn't really cry.  Well, to be honest, I haven't waited long enough to see if she cries.  I think I already know the answer to my question, but, does "fussy" crying qualify as "she's crying, I gotta get in there" crying?  I just feel like the longer she's awake at night, the longer it will take for her to go back to sleep.  I have tried waiting to see if she goes back to sleep or if she really starts crying, but I don't want her to wake herself up too much.  So I always give in and go in there and give her a paci.  Most of the time she goes right back to sleep.  Should I just let her fuss for a while?  Where does the line cross from fussiness to real crying?  I don't want to let her cry, so that's why I am not sure if letting her do some "fussy" crying classifies as letting her cry.  Could someone help me out here?  I know this sounds so stupid, I hate to waste your time.  I am sorry this is so confusing...let me know if I need to clarify some things.  Thanks so much.  Can you tell I'm a first time mom?

Emily
mom to Madeline
7-11-05
textbook with some touchy thrown in

[LindseysMom]

Hello.  If she is not crying then I would not go in.  She may surprise you and go on back to sleep.  It is normal for babies to have periods of awakeness during the night.  Sometimes I hear Lindsey make a noise or something but I do not go in unless she starts crying for me.  It is better to hold back a bit and see if she will learn to self soothe and put her self back to sleep without her paci and give her a chance to find her thumb or a lovey if she has one.   You will know when to go in if the fussing starts to esculate into crying before she gets herself too worked up.  Just give her a little time to see what happens.  Letting them fuss a bit is not cry it out in my opinion.  If she needs you or her paci she will let you know.   :wink:

[mom711baby]

Thanks Lynne.  Since our room is right next to hers, I can hear every noise she makes.  I don't go in at the first noise, but it's so hard to listen to her for very long...(sigh).  Maybe i should try an earplug or something?  maybe it will block out some of the noise, but i will still hear if she starts really crying.

thanks again for the reply.

Emily
mom to Madeline
7-11-05 textbook with some touchy thrown in

[LindseysMom]

You welcome.  Trust me, I have been where you are too.  It is amazing how different you feel as a Mom compared to the age your lo is and how old Lindsey is.  You will be so much more confident in your own mothering skills by the time your lo is Lindsey's age.  Just trust yourself and your own mothering instincts.  You are doing a great job.  It is hard being a first time mom, especially when they are so young.  But the older she gets the more confident you will get too.  Just try not to let her see your insecurities about what you are doing with her.  If you are calm and confident she will trust that you are doing what is right for her.  And don't worry about asking questions on this site, that is what we are here for.

Oh, just wanted to add that maybe some white noise in your room will help block out some of the noise without you having to wear earplugs.  I hate to wear earplugs.  We keep the fan on our hvac set to on all the time which does help drown out noise for us and for Lindsey.  Plus, I got used to sleeping with a fan on while working 3rd shift a while ago so now I have to have some noise, otherwise it is just too quiet.