night wakings not going away... 2 months now!

[Arwyn's mom]

Okay... this is a LONG one.

I have an almost 8 month old who is waking multiple times in the night. This started just after she turned 6 months. Up until that time, she was pretty much sleeping through the night, with an occasional waking at 4 am. and I got rid of that.

She sat up independently for the first time just a few days after her 6 month birthday and that is when this all started. According to my sleep log, she went from no wakings to waking up once, then to waking up twice, then to waking up as many as once each hour from about 10 pm over the course of 2 months.

I did pu/pd for the first 2 weeks, then returned to nursing her at her between 3 & 5 am wake up. I know she used to have a 4 am habitual waking which I got rid of before. To make a long story short, I continued to nurse her back to sleep (not at every waking but some) through the cutting of two teeth, a cold, learning how to crawl, separation anxiety and pulling up. We are now at pulling up and she has just caught another cold.

We are on solids, she usually has 2 naps... 1 hour and 1.5 - 1.75 hours, she is EBF at 7, 11, 3 & 6. She goes to bed for 6:30 ish. Lately, she has been very reluctant at the breast for the 11 and 3 BFs. She goes down almost no problem for her naps... a diaper change, story, lullaby and she goes into her crib for some patting and then she is asleep in less than 5 minutes usually.

I need a plan for nighttime sleep and I need some moral support. I am totally second guessing myself. I was so confident in the BW techniques and they worked so well with Arwyn up until this last little while. The wakings have returned to a somewhat reasonable frequency... 2 or 3 times a night BUT, I want my sleep through the nighter back!

What should I be doing? Pu/pd? Patting? Can I trust it is not hunger? Should I start with one waking at a time? All wakings? This is insane... I don't know what to do. HELP!!

[FrasersMum]

Hi Ankie

I just wanted to pop on and give you some moral support.  I know we have talked about the similarities between Arwyn's and Fraser's wakings but now you have put it in a post all together like this - well, I could have written the post word for word.  From exactly the time is started (just past 6 months) the whole way through.

I will not put any suggestions here because - heck - nothing's worked for me yet.  But I'm positive that the wonderful people who "patrol" the night wakings forum will have some great tips for you.

Good luck and trust me, I'm there with you every step of the way
Cheers
Jo

[Paulsmama]

Hi, did you start solids around 6 mos?  Could the nightwakings be related to tummyaches?  Just wondering because that has been the case for us.  Even teething has not kept DS up at night (at least yet, knock on wood) but stomach pain always has.  Drinking his bottle would help his digestive tract move things along so maybe nursing is helping your LO?  You might just try 3-4 days where you feed her only very simple, easy to digest solids and see if that makes a difference.

Our DS is over 8 mos and I still am too chicken to give him anything else for supper other than squash and/or pears, with 1 tsp rice cereal.  It used to be even having the rice cereal would wake him at night.  Gradually worked up to the 1 tsp at night to prevent MOTN poop.  Recently tried 1 tsp of banana with supper but that woke him up too.  His digestive system is very sensitive, maybe your LO's is too?

Hope things get better for you.

[Katet]

The 6- 9/10 month age appears to be really difficult, they are becoming so much more alert & in tune with what is going on.

The wakings are really hard, but they unfortunately seem to be inevitable to at least som degree, the key is to be really consistent about how you deal with them & also not to rush in too quickly, sometimes your lo may just be making noises while re-settling.

I think if you feel she has had sufficient day food you can trust it isn't hunger for at least 6-8 hours ( depending on your instinct there) that said I personally feel the key is to get them back to sleep as quickly as possible & not "feed an over tired cycle" which will increase waking, so if she isn't settling after a reasonable period, then maybe feeding could be an option...I know my 6mo can & often goes 11 hours but if like last night he wakes at 1am (6 hours) I just feed him as he goes back to sleep.

The key is to be consistent in how you deal with the night wakings... at this age "routine & ritual" is everything & while it may take time to "change" things as long as you set the 'rules' they learn to follow... the first times are hard.

My thought is that she may be a little too "wound down" for naps & bed time, so that she can only fall asleep at a really relaxed state, so if her active little brain says "lets practice crawling" she wakes up to do that (you may not hear her at that stage) & then she gets worn out & because she is normally so relaxed at the start of a sleep, she can't go back off, when she is ready... so maybe try gradually cutting back on the "wind down" I find that it takes Liam about 10mins of rolling around & sometimes I have to go back to "reassure him" before he goes to sleep... but I found the "longer wind down" was causeing short naps... now I tend to just do a cuddle - while talking to big brother &/or story gentle rock in arms for 10secs & then into cot... all up maybe 2-3mins (I do a nappy change earlier in play time)

Just some idea to think about anyway HTH

[a_astorga]

Hi Paulsmama,

How did u know it was a tummyache? cause sometimes I wonder if its that or just seperation anxiety?

How can you tell the difference?

Hes 10 months now and started solids at around 5.5 months.
Ive been giving him everything. And know Im going to begin to keep track of night wakings and what I fed him that night and see if I can find a pattern.

[Paulsmama]

Hi a_astorga I will pm you.

[Arwyn's mom]

Kate... her naps are fine (I think?) she usually does 1.25 and then 1.5 - 2 and depending on the day, a short 30 m catnap.

I tried your suggestion to leave her to settle. We have done it before and what she tends to do is to play for about 20 minutes, then gets all upset because she is overtired. So... I left her today for nap #1. She played for 15 minutes and then I went in to put her down before she got overtired and meltdown (in which case, would require upwards of 30 minutes to put down).

Anyhow, we have also tried this for night sleeps. She is a crier... will cry and cry and cry and cry if we don't "help" her to sleep. We pat/shush until she stops crying... then hold our hands on her back and bottom until she just falls asleep. Usually, she can do the rest herself but sometimes, even the creak of the floorboard will startle her awake and then she just goes off the deep end.

I know she can go to sleep from awake. She did it for 6 blinkin' months and then this hit. Anyhow, I asked the doctor about this and he doesn't think it is food, he seems to think it is just a phase and that it will pass. I could have told him that!  :roll:

Thanks Kate for the reply. If you have any other suggestions, I welcome them... Arwyn has caught a cold and on Mon & Tues night, I had to hold her upright to sleep. Last night, she was back in her crib by herself and was able to be pu/pd'd for her wakings. I fed her at DF time and once at 3 am. This is pretty much back to her "pre-multiple wakings" feed times.

Thanks Paulsmama for the heads-up on food. She started solids about 3 weeks prior to the waking nightmare so I don't think it is that but I am watching for it. She has had no solids for the past 3 days and the wakings have not stopped.

Okay... fingers crossed for this stage to pass!!!

[brownhamblin]

Hi, Ankie-
Just want to offer moral support, as well.  I could've written your post word-for-word and am going through the exact same thing w/our 7 month old Ellison who just started nightwaking about 1 month ago.  It escalated from 1x/night to 5 or 6x/night this week.  She is EBF, but started solids at 5 mo. and has handled that fine, sleeping through the night for another month afterwards.  At first I tried to let her whine for a few mintues to see if she would settle herself, but then she would cry, and I would do PU/PD for up to 45 min./time to get her to sleep.  Like Awryn, she started sitting up/crawling/standing around 5 1/2-6 mo. and I think is now going through some separation anxiety.  As soon as she wakes, she immediately sits up, and starts whining.  I've found that if I go to her immediately, give her a passy and lovey (she's only 1/2 interested in the lovey, but I"m trying), and lay her down (no PU/PD bc she's not really crying), she'll settle right away and go to sleep w/in 10 min. or so.  If I wait until she really starts to cry, then I have to do PU/PD for 20-45 min.  Both of us work FT, so it's starting to become a real problem. 

I've read TH's latest book and the sleep interview on this board, but nothing addresses this problem -- when she's not crying (no need for PU/PD), but needs help settling and can't seem to sleep through more than one or two 45-min. sleep cycles at night on her own, what do you do?  Seems like going in to lay her back down and help her settle is only making it worse, but what's the alternative?  I've been consistent about PU/PD and helping her resettle w/o BF or props for almost 2 weeks, and the frequency of nightwaking is increasing.  I've also tried other suggestions, like changing her evening activity (about 1 1/2 hrs. before bedtime, we only do low-key activities, like walking or reading), feeding her more during the day, introducing DF around 10 pm, monitoring her solids diet (doesn't appear to be gas or upset stomach bc she's not crying and BMs are normal), but to no avail. 

Like yours, Ellie takes two 1-hr- 1/2-hr naps, and sometimes a catnap around 4; goes to bed around 7 and wakes at 5:30 am (I leave for work at 6:30 am).  She's had probs w/her naps lately, too, only taking 45 min. catnaps, but PU/PD seems to be helping lengthen her nap (and we usually have to give her the passy/lovey right at 45 min. when she wakes, but then goes right back to sleep for another 1/2 hour or 45 min.) 

Any suggestions would be appreciated.  I'm desperately in need of sleep!