Author Topic: DS just wont go to bed with out a battle!  (Read 1935 times)

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Offline maxysmum

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DS just wont go to bed with out a battle!
« on: June 14, 2006, 19:58:11 pm »
Our DS has had a really good sleep pattern for about 3 months now, before this we had no problem getting him to bed but he would wake every night. but scince April we have only had a handful of wake ups. The problem now is bedtime. DS has been on EASY scince birth but has started to get really upset after his bath and when he's put in his cot, We've tried PU/PD but it just seems to make him worse so we've tried PD and walk in/ walk out, I'm pretty sure that its a seperation thing but he doesn't do it at nap time or if left at any point during the day. Its taken nearly 2 hours tonight to get him to bed and its not only upsetting for DS but for mummy too. What can we do?

Offline *Nicola*

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Re: DS just wont go to bed with out a battle!
« Reply #1 on: June 14, 2006, 20:53:38 pm »
A couple of thoughts.  Do you have a bedtime routine so that he knows what is coming? If not it might be a good idea to introduce one now.  Maybe a bedtime story, song then bed.

Ciara did go thru this phase too and it was horrible.  We done 2 things - left a top smelling of me under her head at bedtime and took a firm stance.  Once she was down that was it.  I would go in to reassure her but didn't get her up at all. 

It WILL pass, but it is difficult x
Mummy to 2 beautiful kiddies. 

A baby is born from the dreams of your heart, and becomes the love of your life.



Offline maxysmum

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Re: DS just wont go to bed with out a battle!
« Reply #2 on: June 15, 2006, 08:55:32 am »
Hi, Max does have a bedtime routine, he has his tea, we put his toys away and have some quiet time then he has his bath and then bed. I'll try putting a top of mine in with him thats a really good idea thanks.

I guess we'll have to be patient and wait for it to pass,

Steph

Offline Addysmum

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Re: DS just wont go to bed with out a battle!
« Reply #3 on: June 16, 2006, 22:40:24 pm »
Wow, this sounds exactly like my DS.  He has just turned 8 months too and up until a week ago would go to bed fine.  Now he will go to bed as normal at around 7.  Sometimes he will be so tired that he will fall asleep but then wake up after about half an hour, other times he won't go to sleep at all.  Tonight he was fast asleep from 7-7.30.  Then once he woke it took until 11 to get him back down.  He was screaming and we tried everything.  If we sat him up in his cot he would be all smiles but the moment we laid him back down he would scream.  We did bring him downstairs just so that we could have our dinner, and he sat in his chair and was fine, but I do know that it's not right to do that.  Then when he started yawning I took him back up but he was just not having any of it.  I was thinking maybe he was just hungry but I don't really want to get in the habit of feeding him once he's gone to bed.  Also he has been to the docs today who says he has some sort of infection as his glands are up, and he's also a bit wheezy and so has been given some asthma medication so I really didn't have it in me to be too hard on him as he is a little bit poorly.  I know things have to be a bit different when they are ill but at the same time you don't want to make a rod for you own back do you? 

The thought of 7o'clock when both children would be in bed was something to look forward to.  Now I just dread it!  But, strangely, it is nice to know that it's not just DS going through it, and that we're not alone. 

I wish you luck!

Jo
x




Offline maxysmum

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Re: DS just wont go to bed with out a battle!
« Reply #4 on: June 17, 2006, 13:26:07 pm »
Im glad that were not alone.

I really dred bedtimes now too, but I think that me feeling like this is making him worse.

Its really hard to be strong and firm and keep him in bed and I must admit that I have given up a few times and brought him downstairs where he is perfectly fine. Its really frustrating though because he will go down for his naps without a problem. I've moved all his naps/sleep time to half an hour earlier so he now is ready for bed at 6:30 then after the crying and screaming is over its only 8:30 and not 9:30. We've also taken to sitting in his room with him and if he is really upset stroking his tummy, this seems to calm him down and reassure him that we are there. We'll probably have to do a gradual withdrawl now because he'll probably learn to rely on us to get to sleep but never mind.

Let me know if you find anything that works with your DS

Steph   

Offline maxysmum

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Re: DS just wont go to bed with out a battle!
« Reply #5 on: June 17, 2006, 19:04:24 pm »
OMG this is horrible!!! It has just taken an hour to get DS to sleep nothing I could do would settle him. DH isn't here until tomorrow afternoon after work. We just moved here so I don't have any friends or family around for support, Max hardly ever cries he is such a happy baby and it breaks my heart when he does this. I feel like having a good old blub!!!! :( :(

Offline Addysmum

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Re: DS just wont go to bed with out a battle!
« Reply #6 on: June 18, 2006, 07:11:35 am »
Last night we kept DS up until just after 9 as he just didn't seem tired.  When I took him up to bed he wanted to go to sleep but couldn't drop off.  In the end I had to sit with him until he did fall asleep.  However, he woke about 5 times in the night!  It's an absolute nightmare, especially as he has been a brilliant sleeper since 8 weeks old. 

Like you say, I think he's now starting to rely on me being there for him to fall asleep, so when he does stir in the night he needs someone there with him again.  Does your DS sleep through once he is asleep? 

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!




Offline maxysmum

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Re: DS just wont go to bed with out a battle!
« Reply #7 on: June 18, 2006, 09:24:12 am »
Touch wood yes he does sleep through but where he used to wake up at about 6:30 and lay happily in his cot playing with teddy he now cries. I really hope this is a short phase because he is getting more and more tired as the days go on because hes awake until 8:30-9:00 crying but still waking up at the same time in the morning so he's getting less sleep during the day. Today he woke up at 6:40 by 8:00 he was tired so he went back to bed but only slept for 45mins and now hes crying again because he's still tired. I just don't know what to do!

Offline Addysmum

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Re: DS just wont go to bed with out a battle!
« Reply #8 on: June 18, 2006, 20:35:25 pm »
It seems to be a common thing around this age, so in a way it does help to know that it's normal, and just a phase.  Very stressful and frustrating though.  Just noticed that there's only 8 days between our boys, and that you are in the UK too!  I must admit, DS has got a lot going on a the moment, first two teeth, finally moved him into his own room, viral infection, trying to crawl and the onset of separation anxiety!!!  He's asleep at the moment, dropped off at about 8.15 but has already cried out once for his dummy.  Think I might climb into bed myself in a minute and watch BB!

Good luck tonight




Offline jacksmummy26

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Re: DS just wont go to bed with out a battle!
« Reply #9 on: June 18, 2006, 20:56:29 pm »
Hiya dont know if this will be any help to you but my little boy has been going through this a little bit too and it does sound like seperation anxiety my boy is getting a little better and all i can say is that ive had to stay with him while he goes to sleep (he will often fall asleep then 10 mins later wake up with a start and check im still there!) and when i hear him stirring in the night i will go to his room and if he crys ill go to him and gently whisper in his ear its ok mummy's here its just sleepy time and most times he will go back off (sometimes ive left it too long and this can wake him further) this meant that for the first few nights i was standing there for 30 mins to an hour hardly moving a muscle! another tip to save you moving from room to room is to sleep in baby's room on the floor for a couple of nights so you are there when he wakes (this is to ensure him you are there for him dont think you have to do it for too many nights tho as he will get used to it).  Please also bear in mind that this is just a phase and it does pass when baby realises that you do come back when you go away its just a bit of a scary time for them realising that you are not a part of them as they first thought.  Hope this helps x


Offline maxysmum

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Re: DS just wont go to bed with out a battle!
« Reply #10 on: June 19, 2006, 14:48:24 pm »
Thanks so much jacksmummy and Addysmum, its so nice to know that its a normal thing. I sat in his room with him last night and it only took 1/2 hour to get him to sleep so that was a bit better. Lets just hope we all get through this quickly.

Offline maxysmum

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Re: DS just wont go to bed with out a battle!
« Reply #11 on: June 22, 2006, 18:51:44 pm »
Hooray Hooray Hooray ;D only 5 mins to get to sleep tonight Hooray Hooray Hooray ;D I had to stand in his door way so he could see me and he just calmly and peacefully (no crying at all) drifted off Hooray Hooray Hooray!!! :) :D ;D

Offline jacksmummy26

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Re: DS just wont go to bed with out a battle!
« Reply #12 on: June 23, 2006, 19:26:28 pm »
Thats great!  ;D really really happy for you and baby! will keep my fingers crossed for you that it stays that way!  ;)


Offline Addysmum

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Re: DS just wont go to bed with out a battle!
« Reply #13 on: June 25, 2006, 19:51:13 pm »
Wonderful news!  DS has been quite good lately too, although he's waking up in the night every now & again.  Took about ten minutes tonight, I put him down then did a bit of tidying in his room, putting clothes away that kind of thing, then sat on a chair near the cot then eventually he just rolled over onto his side. 

Fingers crossed!!!

By the way, your little one is gorgeous!




Offline maxysmum

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Re: DS just wont go to bed with out a battle!
« Reply #14 on: June 26, 2006, 18:54:21 pm »
Thanks he really likes the camera!:) :D ;D I'm glad your LO is doing better aswell, DS hasn't done it in 5 again but its not much longer than about 10 mins, phew I don't mind bedtimes now!