Is 10 1/2 months too young to drop morning nap?

[Raquelita1]

I'm getting myself all worked up lately as dd is refusing to nap more than once a day - and that one nap comes after a huge effort to get her to sleep in the first place.  She keeps standing up and although she can sit back down she can't lie down, so we keep showing her but it's still all a game to her.  Anyway, for about a week now she has skipped her morning nap, then flaked out after lunch without too much standing up activity - some days she's then slept for almost 3 hours, other days for just 1 1/2 hours.  At night she was previously sleeping about 8pm - 7.45/8am and now is waking up earlier and earlier, yesterday was 6.45am and today was 6.30am.  Today it took me half an hour to get her to sleep this morning, then she slept about 10-11.30am.  I have spent 2 hours trying to get her to sleep this afternoon to no avail, and now i have to get her up otherwise she wouldn't be tired for bedtime.  That means she'll have gone for 8-8.5 hours with no sleep this afternoon.  I feel so fed up as i'm spending hours trying to get her to sleep and i feel like i'm going to have to put all our social activities on hold while i stay cooped up in the 30+ degrees heat trying to get her back on track.  I'm scared that if i get her up before the nap time is 'supposed' to be over i'm just sending her a signal that it's ok not to nap.  Or is it ok to let her drop her morning nap and try to just focus on a long afternoon nap instead?  I'm just worried that she's too young to go to just one nap......  Please help!

[Raquelita1]

Hi Stacey

OK, so ideal routine goes something like this......

7.45/8am wake up & 210ml bottle
9.15am breakfast - cereal with milk & fruit
10-10.30am down for 45 minute nap (seems to be getting later since she started waking up later in the mornings, used to wake 7.15/7.30)
12.45/1pm lunch
1.15/1.30pm down for nap which is usually up to 2 hours long (and sometimes I have to wake her!)
3.30/4pm fruit snack
6/6.30pm dinner
7.15pm bath, 210ml bottle, bed by 8pm latest

I'd already realised in the last month or so that her morning nap needs to be shorter so that she'll sleep better after lunch, and it had been going really well for a while.  But in the last week or so the morning wake-up has been getting earlier, it's been taking AGES to get her down for naps because she keeps standing up, and then she only seems to want to take one nap.  If she wakes early and if i manage to get her down for a nap in the morning (in this case i'd try to put her down about 9.30am) i tend to let her sleep longer if she wants to, but then she refuses to nap in the afternoon.   I just don't know where to go now!

Thanks
Rachel x

[Raquelita1]

Her A times are up to 2 1/2 hours between wake-up and morning nap (including bottle and breakfast in this) - any shorter and she won't settle to sleep, 2 1/2 hours till afternoon nap (including lunch in this), then 4 hours till bedtime.  I have started to wake her by 4pm from the afternoon nap as otherwise she just isn't tired by bedtime.  So some days if she's asleep by 1.30 and doesn't wake up by herself I'd let her go till 4pm anyway and have 2 1/2 hours.  But if she sleeps past 4pm she can be up till gone 8.30 or 9pm and I need my evening!

I definitely don't want to get her up any earlier in the mornings as this would mean an earlier bedtime and that just doesn't work in the Spanish culture.  Even 8pm bedtime is early by Spanish standards but I just about manage to keep up our social life and still get her to bed on time!  So it sounds like you think I should just keep offering the shorter am nap and aim for a longer pm one, and not drop the am one yet?  I will try, but with her standing up antics I don't know if she'll go with it.  I can't make her sleep two naps if she'll only be tired out enough to flake out for one nap.....  Any other advice on how to deal with that?  If after a few more days trying she still doesn't go back to two naps and i decide to drop the am one and just go for a long afternoon one, is that really bad to do at nearly 11 months old?  Would i be an horrendous mother for letting my dd grow out of her morning nap too soon? 

[Mom to M&M]

It may be a short developmental phase - my DD is 11 months today and last week was only taking one nap/day but this week is back to herself and two naps totalling about 2.5-2.75 hours.

Those first two A times sound quite short for her age. I'd suggest 3 hours A time before first nap and 3.5 before second nap. So I'd wake her at 7:30 if she's not up yet and have first nap from 10:30-11:30 and second nap from 3-4:30 and bedtime at 8.

[Raquelita1]

Thanks Karen and Stacy, will tweak the A times and give it a whirl.....