Trouble making it through sleep cycle transition--How long to fix?

[crmom111]

We're currently having lots of trouble with nightwakings.  After the first stretch, my daughter can't seem to make it through REM sleep into a deep sleep on her own. She squirms around for quite sometime and can't seem to settle.  I've read that we should work on this transition during naps and that will help with nightwakings.   We have been successful in the transitions twice this week during naps, but it has taken much effort on my part.  I'm wondering how long it might take before she will begin to make it on her own and when I might see some results at night.  Also, how long should I give her to try and make it through the transition on her own?  If she's just about awake, have I waited too long?  If I'm always helping her, will she be able to do it on her own?  BTW, I've been using patting and sometimes a pacifier to get her through.  The pacifier usually falls out once she makes it into deep sleep.  Any ideas?

How old is your child?  12 weeks
What’s his/her daily routine?  A--7:30a.m., loose 3 hour EASY, Sleep for night 8:30 p.m.
What’s nap routine?  Self soothe with paci to begin, in crib
How long are naps? 30-45 minutes (working on it)
What's bedtime routine? Time?  8:30 p.m.
Do you bottle or breastfed?? breastfeed[color=#00b7ff][/color]
How much? or how long? 20 minutes
If breastfed.. one side or both?? (at each feed)both
How many wakes per night?2-3
What’s your LO like when waking at night? How long is he/she up? First stretch is usually 4-6 hours.  She squirms for half hour or more after first feeding.  With lots of intervention, I can usually get her to go to sleep again, but not for more than 1.5 hours
When you go to him/her is she fussing or crying? Or is it a mantra cry?fussing
What have you tried to settle??  patting, paci, and feeding
What do you do for A time and how long is it?  2 hours, bouncy, tummy time, mobile
Are there developmental issues such as teething or milestones? no
Have you introduced cereal? Why, how much, and how many times a day? (for LO’s under 6 months) no
Do they have a prop? If so what is it?  Paciier, though she doesn't suck vigorously and doesn't seem to be dependent on it.
Do they have a lovie? No

[Messa]

Bump

[Colin Macs Mom]

Can you give more info on your routine please - like what at what time? That will give a better picture. Off the bat though I would suggest moving bedtime forward, but having your whole routine would help.

[crmom111]

E--7:30 a.m.
A--until 9:00a.m.
S--until 9:30/9:45, unless I can extend the nap (sometimes can and sometimes can't)

Repeat routine until about 8:00 p.m. when we begin bedtime routine.  I try and limit awake time in the day to 1.5-2 hours.

Also, I found out today that Reese has silent reflux.  I notice that your son has reflux as well.  Could this be contributing to all the nightwaking?  She seems so squirmy and uncomfortable when she wakes up.  Last night we tried elevating the head end of her cradle and I think she woke up from sliding down and hitting the side of the crib.  Also, our ped. prescribed Zantac for her, but I've read that it doesn't usually work for a prolonged period of time.  I'm worried about using medicine, but will do anything to help her to sleep more comfortably and be less fussy during feeding.

[Colin Macs Mom]

Ah yes, the reflux monster. So sorry to hear that    YES, it absolutely contributes to night wakings. You were right to elevate one end of the crib. If she was sliding off though you'll want to try another way - how did you do it? You can get a wedge, which sometimes LOs don't roll off of and sometimes do, you can put a book or something under the mattress, or if you have an adjustable crib just move the mattress up a rung on one side. If she sides down, you can try a sling sort of thing at the bottom which will keep her from doing that. I'm blanking on the name of the sling contraption right now, sorry.... But at any rate the elevation is very important, it gives LO gravity on her side and will make a big difference at night in preventing heartburn and refluxing since laying flat really aggravates that.

My LO was on Zantac as well (until we successfully weaned it recently  ) and did very well with it. It will take at least a few days to really kick in, so hang in there. The other thing about Zantac, in case your ped didn't tell you, is that the dosage is based on weight so it's very important to stay on top of that. If you suspect she's had a growth spurt or is due for one, get her in to see about an adjustment. Don't worry about using medicine - Zantac is very safe and once it kicks in she should be much better!

You also might find that she doesn't like tummy time - or maybe won't as she gets older. My DS never did, he absolutely hated it because it gave him heartburn to be in that position. So if that does happen don't worry, she will still develop just fine.

[crmom111]

Thank you for the info.!  I'm just so exhausted and depressed over the lack of sleep.  Our first daughter also had reflux, but was sleeping great by 3 months.  I guess I just expected things would be the same and have been sorely disappointed.  In your opinion, how should I proceed with sleep issues, knowing that she might be waking because she's uncomfortable?  I'm not sure if I should nurse her since we're trying to do smaller feedings to minimize discomfort or try and get her back to sleep on her own.  It seems like even when I've been able to get her to sleep on her own, she's still waking up after an hour or two.  Cold she be hungry?  Lots of people are suggesting that I put her in a bouncy or car seat for sleep, but this would be a giant mistake, wouldn't it?  I can sort of see why parents will use props now--you just get so desperate for any kind of sleep that you'll do anything.  Again, thanks for the help, I just feel so worn out--it helps to have someone who can identify or see you though this.

[Colin Macs Mom]

I truly believe that when dealing with reflux or any other medical/pain issue, you need to do whatever it takes to keep LO as comfortable as possible and you sane. If that means AP, then so be it, you can always fix it later. Believe me I was queen of AP back when things were really bad. But now he's a great sleeper except when teething. At the same time though I wouldn't immediately jump into AP either - try everything else first and then resort to that if you have to, and don't feel badly about it! If nothing works to get her to sleep in her crib, then resort to the bouncy or car seat. Those are tough habits to break later so you don't want to get into that unless there's no other choice.

Do you feed at night as it is? Do you dreamfeed? Not sure about the hunger possibility. A lot of refluxers tend to want to eat often, even at night (or especially at night!) because it soothes the pain and gives them some relief.

If you haven't already you might want to poke around the Colic, Reflux & Crying board. There's a lot of great information there and support too! Nadia, Ryan'sMum, is a fabulous mod there and her DS has had terrible reflux since he was born and now he's 3 I think and still deals with it. So, it's a great place to get help and support, and ideas from folks like us