Problems at bedtime, 16mo

[LucyA]

We are having some major problems at bedtime here at the moment. Most nights it's either taking an hour or more to get Callum to sleep, or he'll go straight to sleep but then wake some time later and take ages to resettle.

Callum's never been a great sleeper, he has slept through the night once, just before Christmas. Twice he has slept through after one wakeup in the evening, also in the last month.

He falls asleep holding my hand. I'm trying to ease him away from this, which is working ok for naps, but at night time he often just won't go to sleep. At night he also sometimes falls asleep having his evening bf and doesn't really wake up when I put him down. Sometimes he'll go into the cot wide awake and go to sleep without a problem.

He's been sick on and off for the last couple of months with colds and coughs. He's been coming to sleep with me on a mattress on his floor from about 11pm since he's been sick. For the last week he has been back in his cot the whole night. However he now has a cold again and last night slept with me again.

Our routine is
7ish wake up
12.15 nap for 1.15 to 1.30
7ish bedtime

He used to be asleep within 10 minutes of going to bed. For the last couple of weeks it's been at least an hour most nights. Twice this week he hasn't settled for the night until 10.30pm.

The weird thing though is that when he's taking such a long time to go to sleep he doesn't seem tired, or overtired. Maybe he's so overtired that he's just completely hyper?? But he's his usual cheery self all day. He rarely seems tired or overtired. Some days he's probably only getting 11 or so hours total sleep. Some days he's up near 13. But then he's never been a big sleeper. When we started BW at around 4 months we did well to get him to sleep 2.5 hours total during the day! The longer he naps during the day, the worse he usually is at night. Aaarrrghh!!!

Thanks for reading this far! Any thoughts would be appreciated.

[LŠuren]

{{{{Hugs}}}} Lucy

Your story sort of reminds me about the one in the toddler book the chapter called "a chronic sleep problem".  Do you have the toddler book yet? Is Callum resisting his cot? i have a word doc. here on gradual removal - let me know and I will attach it here.

I have also had to spend nights on the floor in Calums room recently, he is also taking ages to go to be and having numerous night wakings - I am starting to think it is more teething with a tough of SA. He has 4 molars coming in.   I have had to do gentle removal, but it sounds like you are doing that anyway.

L x

[LucyA]

Thanks Lauren

I do have the toddler book, but it's being used to raise one end of Callum's cot right now!  I'll have to get it out and have a look!

Callum's not really resisting his cot, he's quite happy to be in there, he just doesn't want to go to sleep! Having said that, the last couple of nights have been ok, although I think that's largely because he's only had one nap of around 30 minutes for the last few days  When he gets to bed he's too tired to play!

He's got a cold now, so until that passes I guess I'll just let him sleep with me if necessary. At least he's still starting the night off in the cot.

I'm wondering whether I might need to try wi/wo, when I'm in the room he just seems to want to play, so maybe I'm a distraction now??

How is Calum going other than your sleep issues? We miss you over on our birthclub, drop in and say hi sometime!! 

[mari]

I do have the toddler book, but it's being used to raise one end of Callum's cot right now! 

That is so funny, I would certainly find another book for that job!!!

Alex is also having problems dropping off lately.  She lays there singing to us for a few hours, I don't know why.  I don't go to her, she is quite hapy, just having a party in her cot.  I am hoping that it's just a phase.

LCM, are you sleeping in his room?  I would wait until the cold has gone completely until you make any changes.

[LucyA]

Mari, I will certainly wait til he's 100% better before attempting any changes. I did have him back in his cot all night for a week, then he got sick again 

Do you think the problems falling asleep could be developmental? Callum's picking up new words every day and is suddenly happy to play on his own for quite a long time. He really seems to be having a big mental 'leap forward'. If that's the case then I guess it will just sort itself out in time??

Do you think wi/wo is the way to go when he's better?

[Erin M]

DD1 has gone in and out of phases where she'll spend forever chatting with herself and her stuffed animals before falling asleep.  Currently she's doing it for naps -- I've never been able to figure out why, but it generally goes away after awhile.  If he's not crying, I would give it a bit to see if it goes away on its own. 

[LucyA]

Trouble is he doesn't cry if I'm in there with him, but cries hysterically the second I try and leave the room. He's never fallen asleep on his own, always with me at least sitting next to the cot.

[Erin M]

wi/wo sounds like a good idea then.  Definitely wait until he's better and then go that route. 

[mari]

I would do WIWO when he is better.  It sounds like he wants you, but you need to teach him that you are there for him, if he needs you, but now you must sleep.
Hope his cold gets better soon.  Let us know when you are going to start and we will help all we can.