15 weeks and 30 minute napper - please help

[Clemency]

Hi,

My LO is 15 weeks and has never been a good daytime napper. However until 5 nights ago she slept 9 hours straight at night so I wasn't too worried. She was sleeping a total of about 3 hours (4 x 30-45mins) in the day making 12 hours in total (max).

However for the last few nights she is waking progressively earlier (3am this morning) and will not re-settle no matter what we do such that she does not sleep more than 45 mins in a row from then until bedtime the next night.  I have had some advice from BW board that she is over-tired and this makes a lot of sense so today I have worked really hard on her naps.

However this is really really hard - she has between 30 and 45 minutes and then will not go back - she screams and screams until finally I get her to sleep in my arms but it is really fitful, broken by crying, and I cannot put her down without her waking immediately. I have managed to get her to have about 2 1.5hour naps but only the first 45 mins straight and in her crib with the remainder being fitful and broken.  I am very willing to persevere but am doubting whether I am doing the right thing when she is so distressed (she is generally pretty good tempered when she does her own thing!).

I have posted the schedule she was on below which I have kept to until last few days when she has been waking so early - as you can see she has been having a least 2 hours of A time (mainly so I could go to a 3 hour EASY with short naps) but I think this is too much and is another reason I need to focus on naps.  Any
help/guidance/suggestions would be massively appreciated.

Thanks,

Clemency

E  5.30/6 am BF
A  7-8.30
S 8.30-9.15

E 9.15 BF but started topping with 4oz formula to ensure full and try and stretch 4 hours to next feed
A 10-11.30
S 11.30-1.00 (this is a real fight - I get about 30mins then struggle to keep her sleeping -often intermittent with crying, often involves walking round the park) She is a short napper!

E 1.00 BF
A 1.45-3.00
S 3.00-3.45

E 4.00 BF
A 4.45-6.00
S 6.00-6.45

E 7.00 BF
A 7.15-8.15 including bath
E 8.15 8oz bottle
S 8.30 through to 5.30am (sometimes wakes but takes self back to sleep)

[malialeanne]

Hi and welcome to the boards!

12 hours total sleep is definitely on the low side and your problems do sound related to overtiredness. Your A times are quite long for 15 weeks. A time includes the entire time awake including feed time, and most babies this age can do up to two hours but not much more. The first A time is often shorter too. So, if she's waking at 5 :30 a.m. the first nap should start no later than 7:30 a.m.

BW recommends around an 12 hour day, so if your lo is starting around the day at 5:30 - 6 a.m., you probably want to aim for an earlier bedtime (I would do between 6 and 7 because 5:30 p.m. is a REALLY early bedtime! ) A bit more sleep on the front end of the night could help to correct the overtiredness.

Also, I noticed that you've recently added formula. When my dd wakes frequently in the early a.m. it's often due to gas. Do you think she could be reacting to the formula?

HTH!

[Clemency]

Thanks loads for your help - I feel like I am struggling with a collection of issues and am not quite sure where to start. I would be really grateful for your thoughts.

General background - Colette is spirited, has always been a short napper but was sleeping 9 hours straight at night from 10 weeks.

The issues:
1) She does not go to sleep independantly - we hold her, sing lullaby (or sshh) and when she has nodded off play white noise and then put her down. If we try and put her down before she is asleep she wakes immediately. If she is almost asleep we can sometimes get away with it if we stay and hold her limbs and sshh. She is currently half swaddled for naps and in a sleeping bag at night. We have tried her many times with a paci but she is just not interested.

2) She has short naps and will happily (or seemingly happily) go 2/2.25 hours between naps and only sleep for 45mins.

3) I am not sure she is getting enough food - she has started getting fussy and frustrated on the breast and will give up at 15 minutes - yesterday I tried her with a formula top up and she took 4 oz after feeding on both breasts. She has always had a bottle just before bed but I have started introducing one late morning as well and giving her top ups if necessary - I am basically starting to move away from the breast to give me more confidence she is getting the food she needs to help me feel confident persevering with her sleep after 45 mins.

4) She has started waking in the night (last night 2am after a 7.30pm bedtime) and I can only get her back to sleep by feeding her although she doesn't take much but fell asleep on the breast. She then wakes at 5.30am for the day and is wide awake - still having had only 9 hours in total at night.

5) When trying to get her to sleep we have long wind down but she really fights - going rigid and screaming and once she wakes it is nigh on impossible to get her back. Yesterday I went in at 35mins and held her limbs - it didn't work once (after breastfeed) but did after bottle feed - I stayed for 40mins and took her through lots of jerks but within 5 mins of me leaving she was awake again.

I plan to continue to reduce A times and continue to give her extra food but would really like to know where to start with her sleeping - should I be dealing with one thing at once - if so, what and what techniques are likely to be best for such a spirited fighter. Should I be doing same techniques day and night and how do I know she doesn't need food in the night? I feel I need a clear strategy to stick to and am floundering! Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks again.

[malialeanne]

Hi there. I think the most important thing right now is to establish a more appropriate routine and work on independent sleep--getting her to fall asleep in her crib without you. Many babies are her age do need at least one night feed, so it's not surprising if she does, but once you have A times figured out and she's sleeping independently you'll be better able to figure out the cause of her wakings.

The bedtime struggles really do sound like overtiredness. To help deal with overtiredness you can try
A) reducing A times in 15 minute chunks, so for now, move back to 1 hr 45 minutes
b) moving bedtime up--try no later than 7 p.m. if she's waking at 5:30 - 6. Temporarily you might try even earlier, 6 or 6:30 to help deal with the overtiredness.

As for getting to 3 hour EASY--you can try extending naps to make it to 3 hours using w2s, pat/shush, pu/pd, or a combo. We had success by going in when dd first stirred and gently patting, and the key was getting in there before she woke fully. If she wakes at 45 minutes, spend the next 30-45 minutes trying to get her to go back down up until the next feed time. When she gets back to sleep you then wake for the next feed, but at this age she can probably stretch feed times to 3.5 hours or even a bit longer, so you don't need to wake to feed right at 3 hours.

You'll need to use a sleep training technique to work on independent sleep at all naps and at bedtime. Yes, you should use the same technique for day and for night. At your los age you should start with pat/shush and only progress to pu/pd if needed. Your lo is on the young side for pu/pd although it does work for some at 4 months--make every effort to calm in the crib but pick up if needed, put down when calm, etc. With very spirited los it's sometimes best to avoid too many pickups as this can overstimulate.

Pat/shush link: https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=26672.0

Pu/pd link: https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=69177.0

w2s for extending naps: https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=64107.0

Good luck and let me know if you have more questions! HTH!