5 1/2 month old 18lb boy is waking in the night.

[Marianne29]

Hello out there!!!
Okay I have scoured this website for a solution to my son's issue. My son has no problem going to sleep awake on his own;however he has been waking up at least two times a night since we got him home from the hospital. I tired a few things that I discovered on this website and determined that he is not waking for hunger. I usually wait 5 minutes and then go in. If I pat him it upsets him more. The only way to get him to calm down is by nursing him or giving him a bottle with about 2 0z of formula. I slept in his room for two nights to see what was going on. I thought that if I could catch him before he woke he would sleep through. What I discovered is that during his REM sleep which is usually around 1:30 and 4:30 am he gets startled awake. He gets disoriented and starts to scream immediately. He will not take a soother. A pediatrician said to pick him up calm him down and put him back down and that letting him cry it out will have to wait at least another month. Well I started doing that but after a week it was taking longer and longer to calm him down. So my husband and I are more sleep deprived than ever. Even during his naps he gets startled? Does anyone have experience with this will he grow out of this? The books say that if he can put himself to sleep than he should be able to self soothe, but it is not happening here. Here is his schedule.
6:30 breakfast
8:00-9:30 nap
10:00 milk Bf/ or bottle 4 0z only
11:45 lunch
12:30- 1:30 maybe 2 nap (I think he needs to sleep longer)
2:30 -3:00 ish bottle
4:00 cat nap till 4:30
5:30 dinner
7;00 bottle
7:30 sleep
1:30am wake
4:30 am wake

Thanks to anyone willing to offer some advice!!!
Marianne mother of Azlan 5 1/2 months and Zabriah 6yr big sister.

[Layla]

Hi there & welcome!

He's having 3 solid meals? How long have you been doing solids for? His primary source of calorie intake should be from milk so I would be careful how much he's eating & rather do milk 1st & if you want to give solids, 1hr later. Its really though a matter of taste at this age. ALso I think your routine might need some changing. I would suggest the following routine (including milk feeds)

6.30am - wake & milk
9-10.30 - morning nap (try to stretch him to 9am - add 15mins every 3-4 days)
10.30am - wakes from nap & milk
1-2.30pm - afternoon nap
2.30pm - wakes from nap & milk
5pm - catnap
5.30-5.45 - wakes from catnap
6.30pm - milk
bedtime routine
7pm - bedtime & maybe top up milk

Pleas don't let him cio. Are you familiar with the shh/pat technique or pu/pd? If he can put himself down for naps & bedtime then he infact does know how to self settle. I think he's a little overtired especially towards the end of the day where he is awake for 3hrs before going down for the night. When they are overitred, they tend to have trouble settling at night (especially in the early hours of the morning).

[Marianne29]

Thank you for your advice. I suspected that he was napping too early. The Shh/pat technique makes him more upset. I am going to try the pu/pd but he seems to take a long time to settle when I pick him up( greater than 5 mins).

[Layla]

Have a look at the pu/pd board. Its usually the last resort. If you can soothe him in the cot & if his getting worse (the crying), you pick him up to calm him & then pd again.