8.5 month - wont eat or sleep

[yanka]

hi, i am feeling completly lost.
my son is 8.5 month, and still wakes up 3 times at night, arround 24-1, 3-4, 5.
when he wakes up he drinks about 100 ml, sometimes even less. at 5 he might drinks 50ml. after drinking falls asleep imediatly. and during drinking it seems like he is eating and sleeping. how do i stop this pattern? i am working during the day so i cant sleep during the day when he sleeps.
- problem one.

during the day the baby in the kindergarden an eats solids, 11 - breakfast - he will eat 5 spoons and 100 ml milk.
sleep for 1-  2 hpours.
14:00 lunch 5-9 spoons and 100 ml milk.
after that if he will eat at 18:00 arround 100 ml i would be happy. sometims he doesnt eat till 20:00, and even then it would be very very small amunts.
please help!!!!!!i am completly lost!!!!!!!!

Itay's mother

[lawnseed]

Hello and huge hugs - it's not easy

I may not be much use as I can't remember this stage with no1 and am not there with no. 2 yet!

It sounds like his night time feeds are just habit/using the bottle to get back to sleep, and although he's not feeding brilliantly you need to work mainly on his intake in the day. As I bf I have absolutely no idea how much is a good amount - they do sound like very small amounts though. Have you been to see your dr or health visitor to get him weighed to make sure he is growing as he should?

If I recall at this age they still need most of their nutrients from their milk - so concentrate on that first - make sure he is having the bottle before his food. His first feed on waking should be the biggest - don't give him anything at 5am - it will spoil that feed and he's not taking much anyway- at his age even the feed at 3-4 may have in influence on how much he takes at 7am. You may have a difficult time if he is used to taking a feed every time he wakes - maybe try just giving him some water to drink to wean him off the milk at night.

Hopefully, if he's not had feeds in the night he should take a decent feed first thing in the morning. About an hour later offer him solids (this is where my memory dims...) Again at 11 make sure he is offered milk first, and an hour later, solids, repeating the pattern through the day. Check out on the bottle feeding boards how much milk would be normal for this age.

HTH - hopefully someone else will be able to advise further on amounts - but I think you need to try and cut out the night feeds so he is hungry for his morning one - feed at 3 or 4am initially if you're concerned about amounts, and if you're concerned about weight gain go see a doctor!

Anyone else's thoughts?

[yanka]

thank you so much,
i am trying to give him water at the night, but it seems he is hungry? is it possible, that after drinking water, he wants milk?

i visited the doctor, and he said that lo is small, but LONG. i just see other children at his age, they have much more fat, if you know what i mean.
thanks for an advise, started to work on it.

[lawnseed]

If the doctor is happy with him i would say try and work on him taking full amounts in the day - he may well be hungry in the night, but that's probably from not taking full feeds in the day. If he's putting on weight ok (check every 3 months unless he looks like he's losing) then you need to refuse the night feed to ensure he's hungrier in the day. If he won't settle with water you may need to do PU/PD to get him to go back to sleep. You can either deal with one feed at a time at night or just deal with all of them. All of them at once may be difficult, but quicker; if you're worried about weight gain the one at a time option might be best to see if his intake improves.

Worry about his solids after the milk - as long as he's taking some he can improve.

Let me know how you get on

[yanka]

great thanks,
tonite i will try to deal with those two feedings,,,,,,,,i will try water for both and then pu/pd , hope it will work.
i really need a full night to sleep.......
thanks , will let you know how it went

 

[yanka]

just was wondering, may be i should "dream feed"again?

[lawnseed]

That would be a way of getting a few more calories in without upsetting his (and your) night sleep! Sounds like a good idea:)

[Freya'sMum]

Hi Yanka,

How did it go dropping the nightfeeds?

Ax

[yanka]

hi Alison,

my sweet boy was 6 month when i  dropped the night feed. i didnt do it properly, so he still wasnt eating properly. he was also in the kindergarden so may be the stress contributed to that.

now for 3 night i have tried the night feed. but it seems it is not working......
i did the dream feed at 22:00 - 22:30. he was eating 100 ml , his usual amount.
the first night he woke up at 4, the second at 2:25, and third(tonight) at 24:00 and 5:30, ....
i think it is not working.......
please give me an advise...

[yanka]

forgot to ask, when is the"deadline"to drop the night feed?

[Freya'sMum]

There is no 'deadline', my dd#2 was still night-feeding until 13 months, it's very individual I'm afraid!

Could you post ds's Eat schedule again, I'm afraid I found the first one a bit confusing (sorry!) - is it something like this?

5am 50ml milk
11am 100ml milk + some solid foods
2pm 100ml milk + some solid foods
6-8pm 100ml milk
midnight 100ml milk
3am 100ml milk

At 8.5 months, solid foods are still more about learning than about eating, babymilk (breast or formula) is the thing that provides babies' nutrition. Until 12 months babies should be getting a minimum of a pint (approx 575ml) of babymilk in 24 hours, but the best way to work out how much ds should be taking is to remember back to how much he had before you introduced solid foods - this is how much he should still be taking now, with solid foods 'topping him up'!

With this in mind, I would suggest that you reorganise your Eat schedule to get him taking a bit more milk more regularly during the day. The schedule below is a suggestion (I've based it on 1 nap in the day as that is all you mentioned in your first post), but obviously as you are working, you might have to modify it to fit in with your family's other commitments:

7am 150ml milk
8am breakfast solids
10.30am 150ml milk
Nap
12.30pm lunch solids
3pm 150ml milk
4.30pm tea solids
7pm 200ml milk
Bed

The solid 'meals' don't have to be big quantities, just as much as he wants to eat, and could even be offered as finger food if you like? He might still want a late evening milk feed say 10.30pm, but with so much more milk in the day-time I would think he wouldn't need any more at night.

Hope this makes sense, please correct me if I've made any wrong assumptions!

Ax

[yanka]

thank you soo sooo much, i am going  by the schedule you gave me. we had a good atart.
i am relieved that there is no deadline for dream feed, since i was feeling guilty that i give him something without him even knowing it, but i have knowedest that during the DF he is not 100% asleep, he is just keeping his eyes closed and drinks as much as he likes sometimes more, sometimes less.
your schedule seems great.

i will tell you how it went, right now we are on the vacation, trying to deal with 8 h difference....................................

yanka

[Freya'sMum]

Glad you think it's helpful, but don't forget it's only my suggestion, keep following your lo's cues and tweak the schedule as it suits him and you!

Please do let us know how you get on after your hols,

Ax