Napping for 3-4 year old

[Carmela's Mom]

Ok so who is still napping??? What time are naps? And how long? What time is bedtime? And how long do they sleep?

We took Carmela's nap away as it was majorly interfering with bedtime in May.  Well since that time Carm has been showing major autistm tendencies   We are having her checked out with a developmental pediatrician and early intervention.  WELL today as I was talking to my sister about all that is going on, she said that she thinks back to Joey's birthday party (May) and how she was playing so well with the kids, etc. and how fast she changed to the way she is today. A lightbulb went off. The Thursday before Joey's party was her last day of preschool. The Monday after Joey's party we took her nap away! Am I picking out straws here??? WHO KNOWS, but its something I'd like to experiment with.

So today I put Carm down for a nap after preschool. Now I have no clue what time to put her to bed IF she falls asleep! so that's why I'm asking these routine questions again! Of course its been 30 mins and she's not sleeping anyway.

Of course, it could just be that as she gets older, she's getting worst  And that's why its coming to light "all of a sudden".

[Carmela's Mom]

She goes tomorrow to see a developmental pedi.  so hopefully I will know more then, BUT these are her symptoms:I cut and paste this from another site in case it doesn't make sense.  Also with her not taking a nap, these symptoms have gotten SO much worst, which again could be because of overtiredness () or her symptoms getting worst with age.


She is 3 years old so some of the things i wonder if its just her being 3!

First off, socially.  She is GREAT with adults.  she'll play normal and have normal conversations.  She is silly a lot and uses a sing song voice a lot.  She repeats things often.  She is also great with her older cousins but only one on one.  Yesterday was a great example.  She'll play one on one if one of her cousins sits with her and plays, but yesterday was my nephew's first birthday party so her cousins had friends and cousins there and didn't really play with her much.  Instead of playing with all the kids, my daughter stood near them but just recited a Dora program that she had watched word for word verbatim, flapping her arms as she did it.  She does this all day long, yet the minute we ask her to play a game with us or color with us, she will gladly do so.  But then if we get up to do something, she goes back to reciting her Dora.  She only watches like 60 mins a day of TV a day, so its not like she watches it hours on end.

Carmela does give hugs.  She is quick to hug everyone and is always glad to see her family.  With kisses, I always have to remind her to kiss my cheek otherwise she will just kiss the air around me. 

Her gross motor skills are lacking.  She can run, walk, etc., but when she jumps her feet barely get off the ground.  On a trampoline, she is very cautious and will get off right away because she's uncomfortable.  She'll go down slides and loves to swing but doesn't pump.  She can't pedal a bike and gets easily frustrated if I try to work with her.  She won't ride a scooter either.

Her fine motor skills are also lacking.  She can't draw any letters.  she still scribbles a lot.  She can draw circles (hardly).  But that is it.

Speech is very hard to understand for others.  I understand about 90/95% ...hubby understands about 75% and others understand about 50%. 

 

[imsmum]

Carmela's mom

regarding your first question Margot still naps most days but she seems to be down to 9.5 hours of overnight sleep when she does and usually naps for 1.5 hours--she naps at 1:45 or 2 and the last few nights she falls asleep between 9:30 and 10 and is up at 7.  I definitely think she is transitioning out of her nap but we seem to be at a bit of an inbetween phase so I'm reluctant to drop it all together.

I know nothing about autism, but Margot (who turned 3 in August) plays well with her older sister and us (more directed play) but left to play independently with children her age it's a bit more iffy--I don't know if they have the skills at this age to really integrate their play without some direction.Margot also hasn't got the kissing thing quite down either--I'm sure they will have developed that by the time they are teenagers!  Margot can't peddle and is indifferent on a scooter, and her speech is about 75% understood by people who don't know her.  No pictures yet--just scribbles.

how much sleep is Carmela getting?  do you notice that she has more difficulties at certain times of the day?  If you have any concerns, I think you are doing the right thing by having her checked out by a developmental pedi but you may find that she is within "normal" parameters--just that she has different strengths (like her verbal memory!) and weaknesses, with the weaknesses just becoming more noticeable because she is a bit tired at certain times of the day.

Good luck.

[Carmela's Mom]

I understand Stacy.  Well yesterday was a major waste of time.  The doctor just said that Carmela has "autistic tendencies" and to go to an autism behavioral center.  Umm ookkk.....so we are off to CHOP in November now. 

In the meantme, I don't know what to do about her sleep.  The other day when I got her from school she was EXHAUSTED and it was only 11:45 so I put her in at 12:30 (after lunch) and she slept from 1:30-3:00.  I woke her at 3:00 and put her to bed at 7:00 which I know was too early but that was her bedtime with no nap.  She fell asleep around 9:00 and slept until 6:30 the next morning.  Not bad. 

Yesterday no nap and she slept 7:00 - 7:00

Today she had dance for an hour.  She came out totally exhausted so I put her to bed at 12:30 and she fell RIGHT asleep.  I'm wondering if I should bring back the nap since it seems dance and school are knocking her out  

[Carmela's Mom]

Yeah I do think too much.  Like today she had dance and was SO SO SO tired   So I put her down for a nap at 12:30.  She slept for 2.5 hours!  We put her to bed at 7:50 she was rubbing her eyes and DH said she was tired.  So he put her down and its now 9:45 and she's still up in her bed   Now it will continue.  She'll need a nap tomorrow, and be up until 10:00 again at night.  THIS is why we cut out the nap

[Carmela's Mom]

Well the thing is, she had a fever two days ago so I thought she was sick.  Last night she didn't fall asleep until after 10:30 (I went to bed at 10:30 and she was awake).  That's not going to work obviously so I am back to weaning her off the nap.  Ugh

[Mom to M&M]

Why wean her off completely? Like Stacy said, cut it back to one hour and see if that helps. Maybe you can still get her to bed by 8:00-8:30 and maybe the nap will help - at least on days she seems to need it (and on days she doesn't you can skip it).

[imsmum]

I agree with pp's.  On days she seems tired put her in for a nap of no more than 1.5 hours  and on the other days try for bedtime about 11 to 11.5 hours after wakeup.

[sio1228]

amazing reading here, which really hit a nerve. our little sio ( siobhan) has what we are told is "sensory processing disorder". which has some overlap symptoms with ad/hd & autism. very similar to what you`re saying about your LO. the kissing, not playing with her own age group, but ok with adults & older kids. ours also has some serious eating issues ( baby food until 27 months she`s now 33 months ) shes had some private therapy for this which has helped)also hated having her hair brushed, teeth brushed , face washed, etc.she just got tested for autism & came back as "possible". this was out of left field & we were devastated. but the evaluation said "tendencies " are not a definite sign of autism. so keep looking & hang in there. also, with the sleep issues, we`ve been doing BW since sio was 2 months. like magic. she is naping right now after 6 days without a nap. she`s skipped them here & there but never more than 2 days in a row. just stick with it & usually they`ll come around. also, it seems w/ our type of kid, routines are extremely important! hope this helps. you`re not alone  -  sio1228