4 1/2 mo waking almost every 45 minutes - how to do WTS at night?

[claires mum]

Hi Dana - he's had quite a few months getting into this habit...so 2 days probably won't be enough time to get him out of it.  I'd hope to see some change after 5 - 10 days.  Can you hold out that long?

[mrsmynub]

Gosh, I hope so.   Lack of sleep is causing me to get migraines.....last night was bad.....

[elsasmom]

Hi Dana,

I was looking back through the posts last night and noticed the link that Bryony provided quite early on...I missed it the first time.  (In it she references all of the Elizabeth Pantely ideas and 'gentle removal'.)   I hope I didn't really confuse you by bringing it up again!  In my tired stupor I didn't read clearly....so I apologize.

We also had really bad nights on Friday and Saturday.  (Two of our worst.)  I decided to hold off on doing pu/pd or the gentle removal until I explored all of the options first.  (I really don't want to get rid of the dummy alltogether, but will if I absolutely have to.)  So, I've got her on the 4 hour EASY and moved up her bedtime.  (She now gets 4hrs naptime in her cot and 1 capnap in her swing/bouncy chair.)  I realize now that she was extremely overtired which would definitely be a factor.  We've also basically taken away her dummy during her awake times in hopes that she will learn to self-soothe in these situations which are easier for us to control.  (We still break it out when all else fails.)  Most of the time she uses the dummy to fall asleep, but occasionally will fall asleep without.  (I only give it to her if I can't get her to settle.)

Last night we actually had a good night.  She was stirring already before I went to bed and she had seemed a bit unsatisfied with her last bottle, so I gave her a dream feed at 11pm.  (She only took 1 and a half ounces.)  Then she woke at 1am and I gave her the dummy.  But, she slept until 5:30am at which time she was up for the day.  Not brilliant, but leaps and bounds over Friday and Saturday.

This is only day 4 for us on this plan, so we'll see how it goes....

I noticed that you said you've been taking your son's dummy away after he falls asleep.  I just wanted to check, because for it to work, he needs to fall asleep without it...it needs to be removed when the sucking slows but they're still awake.  In the book Pantely says it should work in about 10 days....some of the feedback I've read on this site is that it takes longer.

[mrsmynub]

I meant that we wait until he is sucking and then stops, then we take it away in that, what she calls level one of sleep or whatever.  Gianni had great naps yesterday, all with the binkie, but he spit it out and didn't wake up.  Last night was up every hour.  First he was teething last week and now it is a cold.  So, I'm not sure what the heck is going on.  His eating has gotten better now that we're on the 4 hour EASY.  He takes a dream feed at 10:30 or 11 but still needs to eat in the middle of the night as he drains an 8 ounce bottle. 

I am losing it, though as I am starting to actually be angry at the poor little guy.  I am losing hope that it will work, even after 10 days.  We are on day 5 today.

[elsasmom]

I feel the same way this morning.  I've been feeling frustrated and not too happy with Elsa, which makes me feel worse.  Last night she woke at 1am and I could hear her trying to settle herself with what I thought was a mantra cry.  It went on for 20 min, and started to get really loud...since my son was right across the hall, I caved in and gave her the dummy.  Then the rest of the night was really, really bad.

I woke up thinking this has to end.  I'll just have to do the pu/pd...cold turkey and be done in a few days.  I then looked at the prop and pu/pd boards and read some horrific examples and now I don't know what to do.

[mrsmynub]

I have succesfully done PU/PD with my first sone, but I don't think that this is really the place for it right?  I mean, my DS #2 can get to sleep on his own...but hey, I guess not without the binkie.  I don't know.  Maybe I will keep up with the gentle removal plan for another 5 days (I've heard it can take up to 10 days) and then do the PU/PD if that doesn't do the trick. 

[elsasmom]

I hope your night when better....

I thought I'd offer some words of encouragement this morning.  I'm feeling a bit more optimistic as I saw some improvement in my DD.  Yesterday was her 5th day on the 4hr EASY, and 5th day with no dummy during her awake time.  I also started the gentle removal for her nighttime sleep.  It went as follows:

7pm asleep (put her down with the dummy, took it away once, and had to give back, took away again and she turned her head and fell asleep on her own)

12am woke (gave her the dummy, and took away before she nodded off)

12:50am  woke (did the same again)

2:50am woke (did the same again)

6am awake (happily cooing in her bed)  (this was an hr later than the previous 5 nights!)

I know its very early days, and who knows what tonight and beyond holds....  But, its encouraging, and I thought I'd pass it on.

I was thinking about your situation and its really an uphill battle if your DS has a cold and is teething.  (When we don't feel well all we tend to want is to curl up with a blanket...so it probably is going to be impossible to take it away when he isn't feeling well.)  But, hopefully everything you are doing is preparing him for getting rid of it once he's feeling better.  Also, are you still giving it to him during his awake time?  I've found that its easier for me to take it away during the day, when I'm not tired and she can work on her self-soothing....so, when she wakes at night maybe she can use those new skills??

[elsasmom]

I also wanted to add that I'm convinced I heard her wake at least once between 3am and 6am and put herself back to sleep...  (I hope it wasn't a dream...!)

[mrsmynub]

I think we are making progress as well.  Last night, Gianni went to bed at 7PM and woke up at 9:30PM for a full 8 ounce feed (he had eaten at 6PM) and then went to sleep without the binkie.  He then woke up t 1AM for another full 8 ounce feed and fell asleep without the binkie - so that is a full 3 1/2 hour sleep!!! He then woke up at 3AM and then again at 5AM for the binkie, but I still think it's progress.

I am still allowing the binkie for naps, but I'm not sure when to stop that.  I have stopped giving him the binkie altogether throughout the day.

[elsasmom]

Wow!  That sounds like progress to me...that's great!  Going to sleep twice w/o the dummy and sleeping longer is exactly the right track.  My DH questioned my excitement about last night (3 wakings), but for a mom who often looses count of the wakings, it gives me hope.  I'm also giving Elsa the dummy at naptime, hoping that if she sleeps better during the day, she will then be rested and ready for a deep nighttime sleep.  (My hope is that she'll demand it less and less and we can wean it from naptime later.)

Great news...!