Everything has gone crazy!! Please help with 12 mo!

[Layla]

Then keep moving the nap until its close to 11.30-12pm. To be honest for a good month or so, out 1 nap only lasted for 45mins-1hr as well. Its very very normal and happens to most of us!

It all sorts itself out over a few months.

[chesterella]

ok so i had everything under control, the naps and bedtime all good again. now, he's getting up every morning at 4:30 and crying his heart out. i don't know what it is, he does not have any teeth  but he is not crying in pain. he's hysterica until i go in there and then he doesn't go back to sleep but stops crying. he wants me to hold him and i do not until it gets out of hand. he has been up now for an hour and a half just crying until i hold him. this is from a baby who a week ago was sleeping from 8-8 every night without a peep. i don't know what to do anymore, i don't know where i went wrong! please help!

[Layla]

What time is the nap? Can you post your routine please? Have you tried doing wi/wo rather than holding him?

[chesterella]

his morning nap is usually at 11 nut varies in length lately. some days he will sleep 3 hours! some days he will only sleep 1.5 hours in which case i give him a catnap at 4:30. his routine looks something like this:
wake 7-8
bottle 7:30-8:30
activity from 8 til 9:30
breakfast 9:30
activity 9:30 til 11
nap 11-11:30 til 12:30-2? varies
lunch after nap 12:30 -2?
activity until 4:30
catnap 4:30 til 5
activity 5 til 6:30
dinner 6:30 - 7
bath bottle bedtime 7-8

i have tried wi/wo but he only gets more upset everytime i walk out. there is another post about wakings at 4:30, it seems to be pretty common around this age. i just wonder why the sudden change? eveything was going fine. i would know if he was in pain right? he wouldn't stop crying when i pick him up if he was in pain. 

[Layla]

If wi/wo seems to upset him even more, it might be better to stay with him and do the gradual withdrawal method instead.

I remember that age being really tough for us as well. We were dealing with lots of SA, teething as well as the nap transition. Jasmine never woke as early as 4.30am.... but we did have 5-5.30am wake ups.

[DebLillian]

I was just reading through your thread here and it sounds like folks have given some good advice.  I thought I might add my experience with EW.  We've been up at 4:30am for months (DD is 13.5mo) I did PD, WI/WO, breastfeeding, back patting, snuggling and you name it to try to get her back to sleep over the months and it was mostly unsuccessful.  It wasn't until I did w2s two nights ago that she finally slept straight until 5:30!  What I did was go in at 3:30am and change her diaper (leaving her in the crib).  It woke her enough to stir but she went right back to sleep.  I don't know that it's going to work for good but I thought I'd share our current success.

[chesterella]

hi again
last night was just awful.  i don't know what is bothering him. he has never had SA before but it seems as if he can't stand to have me leave the room. he was up from 12-2 just crying crying crying. i kept going in and laying him back down, telling him it was time for bed, and leaving the room gradually. he would lay back down as soon as he saw me but get up and cry hysterically when i left. after a while of doing this he just gave up, do i keep this going? he was up at 5:55 this morning and went to bed at 7:30 last night, having only 1 nap yesterday from 10:30 til 1:15 (his naps were usually from 11/11:30-1/1:30). all this is so strange because i have never had a problem with his sleeping unless he was sick!
DebLillian - thanks for your advice but i feel if i go in there and he sees me he will not go back to sleep at all. was ur LO sleeping through the night before the 4:30 wakings?

[DebLillian]

Chesterella- Now that I think about it, Lillian has always woken up around 4-4:30- used to be to breastfeed and then one day she just wouldn't go back to sleep and it's been that way since.  She was not sleeping through the night when that happened.  She didn't really sleep through the night until just recently and that is if you included getting up at 4am.

My experience with w2s is that she was so asleep that it would've been difficult to get her up.  This being said, we were up at 4am last night after the 3:30 w2s involved a poopy diaper (which is VERY unusual for her... normally poops in the potty only) so I'm not sure I have any answers   For what it's worth, I do see a lot of mamas of children our age in this situation.  I guess it's somewhat common. 

Also- just re-read something you asked earlier... he might stop crying if he were in pain and you picked him up.  Lillian has had some pretty severe tummy allergies that have caused obvious pain and she always stopped crying when I held her and rocked her but I don't think the paid subsided.  I guess it's a difference between chronic and acute pain... he wouldn't stop crying if it was a split lip but might if it were a dull ache (tooth, tummy)

Good luck.

[Layla]

The bedtime seems a little late to me...  if the nap ends around 1pm, he really should be in bed and asleep by 6.30pm the latest.

[chesterella]

last night was so much better. he slept through with some cranky noises around 4-5. he did try and get up early but went back to sleep until his normal time, 7:15. i think it was a lucky night so we'll see how it goes tonight. let me know if i am doing this right. if it is SA i DO go in there and calm him down, i don't pick him up just tell him to lay down and that it is time for bed. if he doesn't lay down, i lay him down with his paci. then i stand back from the crib and watch. he will usually lift his head to see if i am there a couple times but i keep making sure his head is turned away from me when he lays back down. wheni try to walk out, he cries like crazy, but it took around 3 times to calm him down, leave the room, and then have him cry until he calmed himself down and went to sleep the night before. does this sound ok?

[DebLillian]

Sounds like that last cry you mention is a mantra cry and everything sounds good.  Glad to hear things are better!