What am I doing wrong? Ready to give up

[joho74]

DS is 10 weeks old and I just started EASY 10 days ago. He has been taking 10-30 min naps since 3 weeks old (he had jaundice before that so he slept all the time) and it is not improving. He naps 6 x a day because of the short naps. I do the 4s wind down after 45-60 mins of awake time because of the short naps. As soon as I swaddle and hold him upright he starts to struggle. I rock him a little to calm him down and then put him down where he starts crying almost immediately. Pat him while crying for 1-2 mins hoping it will stop but it doesn't and then pick up and rock to calm him down again, usually at this point eyes are closed but he is still moving slightly. Put him down and again crying starts. We repeat this cycle 1-4 times before he is asleep and I pat him for another 10 mins. On good days he continues to nap till the 40 min mark, on bad days he wakes up after less than 20 mins. He has never reached an hour nap since last week (since we started EASY he had 3 1 1/2 hour naps in 10 days, the rest was less than an hour). I am unable to extent his nap with pat. The shh does nothing for him so I don't do it. Because of the short sleeps, I usually have to feed him before 3 hours. It gets worse later in the day and I end up every 2 hours by evening. He isn't crying or cranky when he wakes up even after 20 min nap. Just yawning a lot. He sleeps great at night waking up only once at 5am the last 2 nights.

This was the routine yesterday

8- wake and feed
9-945 - sleep
1045 - feed
11-1140- sleep
1230-1 - sleep (crying hysterically when woke up after 10 mins, unable to settle had to nurse him to sleep, slept for another 10 mins, woke up again crying, nurse again but didnt fall asleep)
130- feed
2-220 - sleep
330- feed (fell asleep while nursing)
330-4 sleep
530- feed
6-620- sleep
715 feed
730 sleep (took almost 1.5 hours to settle end up feeding him again at 9pm and then he slept so i didn't do df)
1am-feed
6am- feed
8am - wake up for the day

As you can see its all over the place because of the short naps. Please help

Joanne

[Joey'sMom]

Joanne,

I am kind of in a similar situation to yours, except my ds won't be 10 weeks until Friday.  But the nap situation has been very much the same for us, and I have found that I have to put Noah in even before he seems sleepy.  I feed him, I talk to him or play for 10 minutes or so, and then it's right in the cribby.  Now, this is only my second day having ANY sort of success, but I will say, I have low expectations for the length of his activity time.

As far as shush/pat, I find if I hold Noah firmly as he lays in the crib, he prefers that.  I put one hand on his shoulder and the other on his opposite thigh, and just hold on pretty tightly so he can feel secure and, more importantly, not startle.  I do this until he gives me the mantra (kind of a throaty gurgle) and then I walk out.

The more I rock him, pick him up, even offer him the pacifier, the worse I make it.  It's sort of like how if you set him in the swing or bouncer for awake time, you turn around and he's snoozing.  I set him in the crib, and he falls asleep.

Again, this is day 2.  Hopefully our experts will come to your rescue, but this is what worked for me.

Good luck!

[~*~Little Miss Sunshine~*~]

Do either of you use a swaddle?  I know that helped tremendously with my ds when he was an infant otherwise, forget it!

[lashwish]

Well I didnt start sleep training until 4 months, so I can't speak specifically to your child's age.

My DD only napped in sling for 1st 3 months or her life. She was also not a big napper at all. If I was walking around in sling she may sleep for 30 mins or 1 hr if I was pacing around...otherwise it was usually 20 min naps.

I dont think you should PU @ 10, just leave in crib & pat/shush. Why do you say shush does nothing?
The PU at that age makes them more upset, even with my DD at 4 months.

I don't know if this had anything to do with it but we've slept with white noise machine from day 1 as I used one before DD. I also use for naps.

Again, Im not sure how easy EASY is at 10 wks. I definitely followed from beginning but I just think my DD didnt really have her day sleep figured out yet. They do this between 3-6 months (I think) It took about 3 wks of pat/shush & also staying with DD to transition to next sleep cycle. I also did not do it all the time as I was exhausted. One day, like magic she slept for 2 hrs & since is usually pretty good.

My DD is 7 months & is still swaddled. She gets out but won't go to sleep without it. Anyway, should would startle awake without it.

Of course that all changed 2 days ago...but never a dull moment!

Congrats on your babe.

[joho74]

Yes I swaddle but he does get out of it. I have tried tummy sleeping as well but it didn't make a difference. Is it worth investing in a miracle blanket at this age? I have heard many good things about it but DS is a big baby 14lbs at 8 weeks (he is 10 weeks now) so I am not sure how long he will be able to fit in it.

So in pat/shh, what do I do if he is crying? I thought in Tracy's book, it said to pick them up and pat/ shh on your shoulder till they are calm and then put them down again. But then isn't that like PU/PD? Should I just keep patting him even though he is crying hysterically?

But he really isn't cranky or crying even after waking up from a 15 mins nap.

I use the sling with him when we are out and he can sleep for as long as he is in it 2, 3 hours no problem.

The last 2 days it took almost 2 hours to get him to bed at night. I think from being OT.

[lashwish]

You just leave him in crib & pat/shush. Tell him he's taking a nap & it will be OK.

PU/PD for younger babies can make them more agitated. My LO was 4 months & it would get her too worked up.

I also stayed with my LO during for few weeks to pat/shush thru sleep cycle, about first 10-20 mins. It was definitely tiring & lots of work.

Also I know when she was that young if she broke out of swaddle she would wake up.
We used SwaddleMe, its cheaper than Miracle, but its harder to get out of Miracle.

Who knows though, I still think my LO didn't need that much sleep & her Ped agreed. She only took 20 mins naps for first 4 months of her life. She would also be chipper once waking up, so who knows.

[Joey'sMom]

DS definitely needs to be swaddled, and a miracle blanket or swaddle sack is worth the investment. 

If your shush isn't working, have tried a different kind?  It sounds so silly, and maybe it's common sense, but I have to shush ds#2 in a completely different way than ds#1.  DS#1 was colicky, so I shushed until I was practically purple and needed a bottle of water to recover.  DS#2 is touchy, so he likes a very low, soothing shush that I have to drag out, and sometimes I don;t even know if he can hear me, but it seems to work.

Just to go back to my original advice, try putting you LO while he's still cooing and smiling.  Noah goes to sleep on his own this way.  And it's nicer to say good night to a happy boy than an angry one.

[joho74]

So even if he is crying in his crib i just keep pat/shh and not pick him up?

I don't know when his first yawn is as he is constantly yawning the whole day from being OT. So I go more with timing.

I pat for around 10 mins after he has fallen asleep and stay in the room for another 10 more mins to observe him, but like today he woke up 5 mins after I left the room (slept 25 mins)!!

Maybe its genetic. Older DS was such a terrible sleeper since birth and still is now at 3yo and doesn't seem to need a lot of sleep...

[missmeggy]

Just wanted to chime in and say you are not alone! My lo is 12 weeks and has just started doing the same thing. She wakes up consistently between 25 and 30 minutes of napping.

I loved the Miracle blanket and it was very helpful for us. My spirited dd has started busting out of it at every nap though, and if she isn't breaking out, she is "scootching" all over the crib and banging her head against the sides! But if your lo seems to like being swaddled, I would highly recommend it.

[lashwish]

My LO at that age didn't sleep that long either & she was not a grump either.

Physiologically they don't 'figure out' day sleep until 4-6 months anyway. It was about 4 month mark when I started sleep training & after about 3 wks she definitely improved, but I would say I was sometimes lax about staying in room to transition. ABout 5 months one day she started taking longer naps.

[Joey'sMom]

My LO at that age didn't sleep that long either & she was not a grump either.

Physiologically they don't 'figure out' day sleep until 4-6 months anyway. It was about 4 month mark when I started sleep training & after about 3 wks she definitely improved, but I would say I was sometimes lax about staying in room to transition. ABout 5 months one day she started taking longer naps.

It is SOO refreshing to hear someone say this.