2 year old taking over an hour to fall asleep

[momtothomas]

Without getting into too many specifics, can I ask a question?  Generally, does it mean OT or UT if it takes them over an hour to fall asleep?  No crying, just MAJOR squirming, kicking, acting like he's not comfortable, generally sounding annoying with it all (I have a video monitor).  People say, "Hey, if he's not crying, just leave him alone!"  Yeah, that's nice, but if there's something I'm doing wrong that's making him waste so much time that he could be sleeping, I'd like to figure it out.  We haven't changed anything at bedtime (same routine, same type pj's, same temp/sounds/light, etc).  He also wakes up early and squirms like crazy, sometimes for an hour, then sometimes goes back to sleep...  Ugh.

I guess someone's going to ask for my routine, so here it is...  The days he's home (Fri-Mon), he naps a lot longer than the days he's at day care (Tue-Thurs).

Wake up 5:30-6:00, squirm around, sometimes back to sleep until 7 or 7:30 (sometimes not, and only on days I'm home)
Nap 12:30 for 1 to 3 hours, depending on where he is
In bed at 7:20, asleep at 8:30 or 8:45

He does the same thing every night, regardless of how long his nap was and when it ended.  It has been this way for a couple weeks now.  And I can't ask the daycare to put him down at a different time - he's in a class of 10 kids.  We have to get him up at 6:30 the days I work, so it's like the mornings are spent squirming around because his brain doesn't know if he has to wake up early that day or not.

I guess I'm having issues at both ends of the night, huh?  I feel bad for him and feel like a crappy mom.

[ascwing]

I wish I had some help for you! How does he act when he does actually get up in the mornings? How does he act when he gets up from his nap?

[coopers_mommy]

I feel your pain....DS is also taking about an hour to fall asleep at night....sometimes with crying, sometimes with out.

[Mimi 2]

With us, it means UT. 

[jellybabe]

I would say UT too. His nap seems awfully long for his age. It could be worth reducing his nap to say 1 1/2 hours and be constant with it. If they nap too late, it could be an issue too. But like said, at the daycare you cant have it your way. I would say if he wakes quite early, he will probably nap early once you can get him into that routine.

My ds did exactly the same and he did that since he was a baby too. I'd have to stay with him till he is asleep and he'd just fiddle and roll around for 1 hour before he'd settle. My ds is starting to skip his naps. He is 2.7 but still napped when he was 2. He would nap for 2 hours from 2 to 4pm or something bad like that, and he'd be awake till 10pm with  no sign of getting tired!! Now after sleep training and getting back on track, he goes to bed at 8pm and wakes at 6am, and if he has to nap, i try to make it around 12pm. He now takes about 15 at most to fall asleep, depending on if he napped or not.

[Fiona (Leah & Kians Mom)]

Hmm going to say that if he naps 3 hours or anything over 2 then its too long for his age. If you want to keep the nap that long then you are going to have to go with a later bedtime so shorter night.
Ds does A around 7
Nap , in bed 12. 45 usually asleep by 1.
A by 2.30 if he is not awake I will wake him.
Bed 7.30, usually asleep by 7.45.

DD was on a pretty similar schedule at the same age

[momtothomas]

Thanks for everyone's responses.  He's only taken these 3-hour naps for the past week or two - usually it's 1.5 hours.  The late nights have sort of happened when the long naps started... but I have no idea which is causing which (if that makes sense)!  My mom kept him today (he was sick yesterday) and she only let him sleep 1 hr 45 minutes.  He still took 45 minutes to fall asleep tonight.  I guess I have to give it time...?

[jellybabe]

Mmm, yes, its like a vicious circle. They get tired if they dont go to bed early enough, and then end up being tired in the day coz of not enough nite sleep. Totally right. It will take time for him to adjust if you going to adjust his naps. His body needs to have a 'kickstart' into new routine. I remember when ds use to go to bed late and end up very tired and cranky in the day. He had a cold at that time too, so the medicine I gave him (makes them sleepy) actually helped coz I would give it to him half hour before I want him to sleep. By the time i put him down he's sleepy and actually slept quick, so he got a good nights rest and was much happier and needed less sleep in the day. You might need to try and limit his nap to say 1 1/2 hour, and get him to sleep by 12pm, then he should be tired enough for bed by 7/7:30pm. They just seem to have never ending energy some days. My ds would sometimes not nap all day and still be running and jumping about at 7pm!