Shortening naps and EWs

[*Liz*]

I have been in the EW loop for months and months now. Keep getting stuck in OT loops, adding lots of daytime sleep to catch him up, and then the EWs come back again. Usually because as soon as I move back the first nap he refuses his pm nap and gets OT.

I did try a short am/long pm for quite a while but he was refusing the pm nap regardless of how short it was and I had a very miserable man with a very low amount of total sleep.

I think I might be making a royal mess of this 2-1 thing  and that I actually need to move FAST to 1 nap and then let him adjust. I'm wondering if I keep getting stuck in these loops as I am going to slowly.

When he was 6 mths J was a low sleep needs baby - he finally started taking long naps and was on 3-3.5hrs A.

At 8 mths we went away for a while and the EWs settled as we were doing a 2hr am nap, and a 45min pm catnap. As we recovered from the travel home we went to a short am/ long pm to see if that would help the EWs. We did a 1hr am nap and 1.5-2hr nap nap for a while, and then the EWs returned and I struggled to cut the am nap so he basically ended up doing 2x1hr naps. And the EWs continued on and off throughout.

At 11 months be started refusing naps, and singing for up to an hour at morning naptime or bedtime. It often takes him ages to sing himself to sleep really. The only time he settles quickly is during an OT catch-up period.

We had a dreadful OT loop at about 11 months that ended up in 4am EWs  .

Since then he has been doing
Awake 6.15am
Nap 1 10.30ish for 1.5hrs
Nap 2 3.30pm for 45 mins
Bedtime 7.15pm

But the am nap is getting shorter - down to about 1h 15 now. He is doing 3hrs A after a 45 min nap but I am back to EWs again. He is not going to bed OT - I can tell as he is still playing nicely and drinks his bottle. He refuses it if OT and flings himself backwards to be put to bed.

Soooo..... trying to muddle all of this out....... low needs for sleep when younger, started cutting daytime sleep at 8 mths, lots of problems with singing for ages at naptimes and bedtimes, and EWs....... 4.5 mths is probably a bit too long to be 'in transition' isn't it? Have I messed this up and just not cut fast enough.

The thing is if I move that am nap back he will sleep about 1.5ish hrs and then refuse the pm nap, and then go to bed OT.

I don't know how to get out of this. He only had one nap yesterday - I had a rare 7.15am wake up (after a hour awake singing at 5am) and put him down at 11.20am. He took 25 mins to sing to sleep and then woke at 1.15pm, refused his pm nap, went to bed really easily but woke at 4.30am  . He did go back to sleep from 5.15 - 6.15am.

Just wondered if anyone else has dealt with this stupid UT/OT cycle and can tell me how to get out of it?!!!

Do I need to 'power through' onto 1 nap? And if I do how do I do it?

Thanks 

[Mashi]

Liz, I have NO idea if this will make sense or if this is correct or not, but I do have a thought.  Just a floating thing running through my mind.  Bear with me and trudge through what I have to say....

I do the short am / long pm nap.  It used to be a 45 minute morning and 2hour afternoon.  When the afternoon dropped to 1.5 hours, I cut the morning to 30 minutes - and magically the afternoon nap went back up to 2 hours (sometimes even longer!)  At the moment, we occassionally have the afternoon nap back down to 1.5 hours, which is a sign to me that I very soon need to cut that morning nap shorter.  Makes sense - right?

Well, as you said, if you push the morning nap later in order to get him to sleep longer, he won't take his afternoon cat nap. But somehow you need to get him to do a 2 hour morning nap and 30 minute afternoon nap - am I right?
 Soooo, I am wondering if you could cut the 45 minute catnap to 30 minutes, and put him to bed earlier to make up for it....after a few days would that start working itself out to have him increase the morning nap to make up for it, and/or you could stretch it out in the mornings and he might stop refusing the catnap because he will have learned it is shorter?  I don't know if it will or not, or if I am thinking reasonable it's just a thought....I'm sort of thinking about how you drop bottles to get them to take more, iykwim.  And, that what I need to do is cut the catnap to make the long nap longer, so perhaps that works in the opposite nap scenario.

Anyway, just a thought.  Call me crazy if you want, I don't mind! 

[*Liz*]

Well I kind of understand what you are thinking..... but I'm not sure. I struggle to push A's at the end of the day as J likes a shorter A to bedtime else he gets OT, so would need to stretch the am A but that would still leave the same gap between the 2, and the EWs would continue.

I suppose the other way of doing similar is to push the am A and AP a CN in the car. But I work 3 days a week and could only do that for 4 days, my mum does follow BW for me but there are limits. She would do a relaxing buggy ride though. She loves pushing him in the buggy  .

We are definately in OT territory for now though.

I'm NOT looking forward to my EW!!