Hi Tippypippy
Just want to send you some love and encouragement. And congrats on becoming a mum!
And is it possible she needs to only be up 45 min? or so? like eat, burp change diaper and back to sleep? I have a hard time thinking that all she should do is eat and sleep
Actually - at this age this is about all they can handle. It seems a bit tedious and boring at the moment but that's all going to change really quickly. Yep, feed, burp, nappy change, sleep, that the normal cycle for her age. You will have plenty of play time coming your way in a matter of weeks. Right now she is still adjusting to being in the world, to learning how to eat and getting used to her family. She is also recovering from the birth experience - so she needs lots of food and lots of sleep.
So average awake time is around 40-60mins, average sleep time is 1.5-2.5 hrs (maybe 3 hrs), average time between feeds around 1.5-2hrs. Now these are averages - your little one might fall outside or inside of these timings.
If she is crying, take a deep breath and go through the check list. Dirty nappy? Hungry? How long ago was last feed? If 1.5hrs ago more or less offer the breast see if she takes it. Gas? Try burping or just holding her upright. Tired? When was the last nap, how long was it? Over stimulated? How long has she been up? What has she been doing?
It helps at this stage to keep a log book of her days. This way you have some material to work with and you may see a natural pattern developing.
Can you tell me a little more detail of how you put her down to sleep? At this age it helps to swaddle - are you swaddling? Swaddling is an ancient practice that stops the jolts (the moro relfex that all babies are born with) from waking them up or frightening them. It also replicates the closeness of the womb and can make LOs feel secure. If you need some guidance on how to swaddle let me know and I can send you some links. It also helps to darken the room. You can start to build a sleep time routine now - it will be a short one at this age, for example you feed, burp, nappy change, swaddle her, hold her in cradle or shoulder hold for a few mins and pat or sing or whatever you are comfortable with. Lay her in the cot, continue to pat/hum/sing softly, stay with her. This way you will start building a foundation of sleep time cues and soon enough she will know that they mean sleep time is coming. Some LOs need more help and encouragement to get to sleep...they might need your presence a bit more than others especially as they are starting out learning independent sleep.
Learning to read your babies cues can be rather hard. I felt it took me a good 5 months to understand my baby's cue signs - so don't be too hard on yourself for not knowing them straight away - you guys have only just met face to face. Over time you will learn her like a book.
So right now, follow a simple day...eat burp nappy sleep eat burp nappy sleep...it will become more fun really soon I promise. Keep her up times to about 1 hour and lets see if that helps with her sleep times.
It seems hard now...because it is! Being a new mum is the most full on experience, its exhausting, its demoralising, its often gross (anyone for vomit in your hair or poo on your pajamas?) But its also amazing and miraculous. Its hard right now to see the light but you are doing a great job and it will get easier with time. There are many of us here to help you and offer you encouragement.
please stay in touch with any questions or doubts or even if you just need to have a virtual cry on a virtual shoulder.
xxx
