Problems with going to bed for me, but not for DH with almost 2 yo

[J & J's Mum]

Help!!!!!!

Our DD is almost 2.  She's been cutting her last 4 teeth and recently had a really bad cold and cough, so I slipped in to accidental parenting    I would stay in her room until she went to sleep (this was the only way she would sleep) and when she woke up in the night I'd stay with her.  Not ideal, I know, but at the time we had my Mother In Law over from the UK and she was sleeping in the room next to her, so I was trying to minimise the disturbance!!!

So now, she will not go to bed for me, unless I stay in the room.  Yesterday for her nap it took me 45 minutes of taking her back to bed, I eventually gave up and stayed in there until she fell asleep!  I even tried closing her door, but no!!!!  So this is the same at night time too.  But..........when DH takes her to bed, she stays in bed and goes to sleep    He says and does the same as me, but after I've said the bedtime things, when I move away from her, she just gets out of bed.  She doesn't do it for DH!!!!!

So,  I know that she probably thinks she gets away with it with me, so how do I tackle this?  She goes to daycare 2 times a week and is perfect there too.........it's just me she plays up!!!!!

Thanks
Raachel x

[*Becky*]

Hi there,
Sorry to hear you are having a rough time. I would do WIWO in your situation. I am presuming she used to be an independent sleeper?
We went through a stage where I had to be in the room with DS and we solved it with WIWO.
What do you think?
Becky x

[*Becky*]

I meant to say that I would only do WIWO if she is better i.e. not teething or sick x

[J & J's Mum]

Hi,

Yep, she was a really good sleeper before!!!!  I'll try WIWO.  She went to bed like a dream for DH again last night 

[*Becky*]

keep us posted x

[J & J's Mum]

She totally refused a nap yesterday after goodness knows how long of taking her back to bed.  She was just soooooo awake!! So she went to he early, she didn't want DH to take her, so I ended up doing WI/WO for 1 hour or so!!  Then from 11.30 - 4.30 I was in and out of her room because she wouldn't settle.

I soooooo want her to sleep!!!  I just can't understand why she's changed so much.  She's been perfect for months in her toddler bed!!

[*Becky*]

wow - she must be v OT.....can you post your routine so we can take a look. Don't worry, we have been through stuff like this too especially with the naps...bx

[koe2moe]

i hate teething!!!  some hugsss for you J & J's mom!!!  Hope this will go away soon!!! 

[J & J's Mum]

Her routine is all over the place at the moment.

Generally it was:

6-7 wake
12 nap for 1 1/2 hours
7.30 bed

With the amount of time it's taking me to put her to bed, it knocks all the times out!  She's now even refusing bedtime for DH.  She sleeps like an angel at daycare.....2 hours there yesterday.  We had a friends birthday party yesterday evening, so we didn't get back until 8.30 and she wouldn't go to bed!  It took almost 1 hour to settle her.  We kept going in and she did finally settle.  She woke in the night once and just wouldn't settle without me in the room.

I'm really going mad with this now.

[*Becky*]

ok - I think the a time after the nap could be the problem. If she naps 1/1.5 hours at 12pm I would have her in bed by 7pm at the latest and see how that goes. You may even need to bring it  a touch earlier but try that for now.
I forget - did we talk about teeth? Could there be some 2 year molar action going on?

[J & J's Mum]

Yes, she has 4 coming through 

[*Becky*]

ok well that will be it then! It is so hard with teeth as you can do all you can and yet they do not sleep well.I had to be with my lo for a period of time when his first molars came through but he did go back to sleeping independently once they were. In that case i would forget the wiwo as really we want them to be healthy and not teething for that. I would do a slightly earlier bedtime and also give meds as and when you think she needs them.
hugs - I do know how hard it is!
bx

[J & J's Mum]

It certainly seems like it's an issue just for me. 

I asked at daycare yesterday, she goes down for a nap perfectly there.  Because she's one of them that sleeps the least, they put her down last and stay with them until they go to sleep, but she always settles.  Every single time DH puts her to bed she rolls over and goes to sleep.  Whenever I do it, whether it be nap time of bedtime, she gets straight out of bed and follows me to the door saying "Mummy, Mummy"  If I stay in the room next to her she will settle.  I really don't know what to do!!!!  She doesn't seem to be suffering or miserable from her teething.

[*Becky*]

In that case I would do WIWO so she sees you mean business...but of course are there for her x