Nursery messing up E.A.S.Y!!!

[Mosh]

Hi, my little one is 11 months old and on a good E.A.S.Y routine:

A between 6:00 and 6:30 wake and play in cot
E 7:00 get up and have 9oz
E 8:00 breakfast
S 9:00 - 10:20
E 11 6oz (going to drop this one at a year)
E 10:00 lunch
S 1:00-2:20
E 3:00 7oz
E 5:00 tea
A 6:00 bathtime routine
S between 6:40 and 7:00

he has not long started nursery however and it has been messing us up!!! initially they were putting him to bed 9 but he only sleeps for half an hour there.  they were then keeping him up till 1 and he was OT by the time i got him in bed at 1:00 at home (he only does half days).  now they have started putting him down for a second sleep at 12:00 which is fine as i do not want him OT but i cannot work out what to do when we get home.  For the last 3 days (he only does 3 days a week so that was one day last week and two this) we have had such a mix!


Each time i have aimed for another nap time of about 3.  2h15ish mins after wake up.  the first day it was perfect, he never complained and went to sleep like a dream.  he was happy when he woke just over an hour later and made it through bathtime routine easily (we have a very long A at the end of the day and he sometimes struggles).  he also went to bed without a word.  however, this has not been the case again

next time he went in in tears (although obviously tired) we did about 10 mins of PU/PD (poss more like WI/WO) and he stopped crying and took about another 5 to go off to sleep.  he then also went down in tears at bedtime which is not like him at all (infact we have not had that since dropping the cat nap at 6 months.  (to be fair, all in all it did still work and he still had a good night, which he had not been doing when OT)

today i put him in at 2:45 and had to do 2 pick ups before he settled, however, he did not actually go to sleep for another 45 minutes!!!  I am sure he is tired if not OT.  Has anyone experienced nap refusal from OT? or am i trying to force too much sleep on him?

and does anybody have ideas as to something i might try? as if he does not want the extra sleep he certainly cannot go from 1 till 7!

I really want to enjoy my time at home with my boys which is why i now only work mornings,  but at the minute i am finding myself wishing i was at work!!!  any words of wisdom would be much apreciated!!!

Thanks Claire

[Chicane]

hey Claire,

sending you hugs, I can totally understand your frustration. I dont have a LO in nursery just yet so no real advice there. Hopefully this response will bump you back to the top of the list and some others with experience in that area can chime in. I did think though that most nurseries should try to adhere to your routine as well as possible. Have you tried to speak to them about what's happening when you get home? Perhaps there is some kind of compromise you can reach...

But there is also another thing to factor into this behaviour...the 2-1 transition which commonly starts between 10-11 months. Its a mindfield! We are going through it right now too. Could these changes not only be the disruption of nursery but also perhaps he is starting the transition

check out these links http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=163278.0
http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=145285.0
http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=172444.0

xxx

[Mosh]

Thank you for your reply!  Nursery do try to follow my routine but he just will not do more than  45 min nap there (usually 30)  I asume that when he comes into the light sleep he is just too interested in what is happening to go back off again. 

I have also thought about the 2to1 but he has always needed more sleep than most and we are just not having the same probs at home (he is in 3 days a week and at home 4)  on a fri he actually sleeps for 2h in the morning and still does his 1h20 in the afternoon as he is playing catchup.  if we were 2 to 1 transitioning though he still could not cope with the nursery sleeps as his last A would be a whopping 6-6h15 mins and although i am happy to adjust bedtime (ds1 had 6:30 latest bedtime when transitioning) he would still be havign a 5h plus A at the end of the day.  he also still struggles like crazy to get past 9:00 in the morning for 1st nap...even when he wakes closer to 7 than 6!

[Chicane]

Hey Mosh sorry for not getting back...I am going to ask some others to look at your post as I have no experience with this kind of prob...i do however think it will work its self out, keeping him on routine the days he is home will really help...xx

[~Emma~]

 Hi honey,

 I have no real advice I'm afraid as we went through the same thing. Going through the 2-1 and having to cope with OT from nursery was hard work. I understand where you are coming from about wanting to spend quality time with your LO whilst you are not at work. My LO is still exactly the same, highly spirited and has never really napped longer than 45 mins at nursery.


 All you can really do is get nursery to stick to your routine as much as possible and try your best at home. My DS was in nursery 3 days a week too, he was always AP'd to sleep there and it never affected his abilities at home. I would also AP a nap in later in the afternoon if need be rather than fight with him about it!  The main thing that saved us though was the good old early night, it will keep OT at bay at least a little. On days at home I usually let him sleep as long as he liked within reason.

 Sorry I cant be of much help. 

[MLK]

What if you asked nursery to put him down for his first nap at 9:30 instead of 9? He might still only sleep half an hour but it might give you more time to get home and put him down for a longer nap there.

[Chicane]

Hey Mosh

here is another response I got fro one of the other mods

----

Dylan had really short naps when he first started daycare too - and I mean 20m for a whole day short   It really was an adjustment period; although they have a separate dark sleep room, it was still open to the main room so he had to learn to sleep in a new room, new crib, with lots of new noises (including other babies crying, waking up, etc.). 

The only thing that I actively did to help was start playing music in his room.  They play music (lullabies) in the sleep room to help drown out some of the noise from the main room.  We were guilty of giving Dylan a 'pristine' sleeping environment (according to my SIL), so by playing music at home we were trying to make it a bit more normal.  Don't know if it helped, but over the course of the next month or so his naps gradually started getting longer.  Eventually he ended up having to be woken from every nap!

[Lolly]

I found both my two had a period of adjustment where they didn't nap or eat as well at nursery - they were both there for 3 half days too. The problem I also had was they went in the afternoons and we had a 30 min car journey to get there so they would sleep in the car and that would be it most days. Then they would sleep in the car on the way home which would mess up bedtime.

DD wasn't so bad but DS was a nightmare and really we just had to do what we could to keep him rested on the days he wasn't in nursery. Nursery days were as early to bed as we could like Emma suggested.

You may well find that he adapts to nursery and the naps get better or as he gets bigger he can cope with less sleep some days better.

Laura

[Mosh]

Thanks guys for the replies.  he does tend to play catchup on a friday and sleeps for 2 hours at his 9am nap.  guess we will just have to ride it out for a while and see if he manages any longer sleeps there!  he went down beautifully at 3 yesterday but today he was in bed from half 2 to half 3 (not upset but not sleeping) before i finally got him up as he began to cry.  he seemed really tired today from the second i got him home...he goes on his trike to pick his brother up from nursery school and he even hated that.  he has just pulled himself up on me, put his head on my  back and started sucking his thumb...bless! def an early night tonight i think!

[Mosh]

He just could not cope till anything like bedtime so we had a app nap in the are just before 5!  he seems to have gone down ok so fingers crossed.  Just need to get the big one off now...it is his b-day tomorrow and he is somewhat excited!!!

[Chicane]

happy birthday!

(hope the nap works out)

xxx