PT has wrecked bedtime:( Any Suggestions?

[georgeo]

Hi,

DS just turned 2.  About 2 weeks ago he decided that he wanted to be potty trained...just like that .  He's had a couple of accidents since but he's essentially trained.  We didn't push, showed him the toilet seat, let him have some tries at times when we thought we might get lucky and the rest is history.  It's like a switch just went in his brain.  We bought him some underwear last Thursday and he loves it.  Then.....bedtime started to change.  We talked about how at night we wear a diaper because sometimes pee comes out when we are sleeping, that it's not a big deal.  I don't know if that scared him or what but now bedtime and nap time are incredibly long drawn out affairs.  Sadly he's upstairs with DH crying his little eyes out.  He wanted to try pooing three times before bed tonight...sometimes it seems like a stall tactic, other times it seems like he genuinly wants to.  Tonight we explained that the poo isn't ready to come out but it will be tomorrow.  I think he's afraid of peeing in his crib.  We've talked about it with him, that it's okay if that happens. 

Anyway, did anyone else have a similar experience?  He was sleeping independently, we can't walk or rock him to sleep.  He went down for his nap without any help yesterday and today but bedtime has been awful.  Last night was odd because he was upset for a bit and I said "I'm going to get you some medicine,"  He immediately stopped crying and played happily in his crib while I went to get it.  I gave it to him and he immediately laid down and was asleep within minutes!  We don't give it a lot but I just thought I'd give it a shot.  We gave it tonight 45 min before bed but it doesn't seem to have made a difference.  He just sleeps in underwear at nap time.  Tonight we put underwear and then some waterproof underwear overtop.  Sometimes just before we put him in his crib he wants to put a diaper on under his underwear (which personally I think is a fantastic idea!) but when I tried that tonight he flat out refused.

I know this is a huge step for him and expected it to mess up his sleep but I feel so bad for him being upset before bed.  What do you think?  I'm wondering if talking to him while he's asleep would be a good idea but I'm not sure what to say!

[Tweakster]

HI there is he teething too?  What's the medicine for?  So he won't wear a diaper to bed then? 

[~inbalance~]

I suspect that it is just a temporary blip due to the PTing and it will pass.  He is still in his crib then?  Once he is in a BBB you can leave a potty in his room, but that is probably not a road you're heading down just yet. 

I'm wondering if talking to him while he's asleep would be a good idea but I'm not sure what to say!

If you would like to attempt something like this I would strongly advise you to research the topic so that you know what you are doing.  There is a book called Sleep Talk that uses this type of approach, but I think it is wise first to read about it so you understand what it is about.

We can also have a look at his routine too to see if there is any tweaking that might make a difference. 

[speechie]

Hi there! congrats on the PT progress! lovely that it is self driven. My LO PT'd at 2 as well, and was waking up dry at 18 mos consistently. So, IF your LO is waking in the AM with a dry diaper, I'd just skip the diaper completely and just go for it!
If he's still waking wet in the AM, then maybe pull ups or training pant as they look more underwearish?

[georgeo]

Thanks ladies.  I agree that it's just a phase.  I just wish I felt like we knew how to help him through it.  It feels like we just need to ride the wave but as you know it's heartbreaking to hear them cry so.  It sent me right back to the early days of sleep training when we first found BW. 

I think he has one more upper molar to go...it's so hard to really see in there though.  That's why I gave medicing the other night, just in case.  Surprisingly the other ones came in without much hassle. 

Good idea about the pull ups.  He is pretty much dry in the mornings although there is a little bit there.  He generally resists a diaper when getting ready for bed, but just before we put him in the crib he asks for one, goes and gets it from the closet or can be convinced to put it on.  We decided to just go for it but then he asked for one.  We had the same issue at nap time today where there is no diaper. 

It feels like it's a combo of two things:
     1) He feels that there is a poop that he needs to get rid of but it's just not ready (TMI-sorry!)
     2) He has learned that mom and dad will take him out of the crib if he says he needs the toilet so has learned to use this as a stalling tactic. 

I guess we just let him go once shortly before bed, ask again just before going into the crib and then refuse to take him out of the crib even if he says he needs to go.  Part of me feels that just isn't right though..... I had no idea there would be so many dilemmas involved in parenthood!

[speechie]

well, I remember taking Nick out of the crib 2x after going to bed, and he did produce on the potty,...it's just a sticky wicket! I erred on the side of believing that he did have to go, and telling him that I expected him to be honest if he needed to use the bathroom. 99% of the time he DID have to go, he's just a nighttime pooper...sigh.
Not to say that they don't use it as a stalling technique. ...hard to know what to do!