TBH I have moved away from waking him up as he is a total pain if I do. He will always wake after 1.5hrs if I leave him as he just isn't tired enough for a whopper nap these days. If it is getting late then I grab him if he is wiggling, so he wakes during a transition rather than a clock time.
If I 'think' he needs a later bedtime I get jigsaws and the TV out and he will pretty much tell me when he is done. He will say he is tired and get his books out. If i follow him then he often does go to bed within half and hour of his usual bedtime. I actually get more resistance with OT these days rather than on the nap days.
Wendy - I never thought J would nap on a sofa either - he falls asleep watching TV. He watches a program designed for 5/6 year old and I think he doesn't really get half of it so he nods off listening to the talking.
I have seen a huge change in his sleep in the last few months though. A real shift from being a baby into being a kid.
I do suspect that I blamed the 1-0 for quite a few things that were actually developmental, and I do think he dropped the nap during a blip really, but there was no going back with J. He was too stubborn. But a lot of EWs were likely BBB related, and nap refusals were likely partly not wanting to miss out once Megan was awake and playing.
But it is settling down, and I am happy with his sleep now.
He sleeps 10.5-11hrs a day mainly, on a nap day it will be 12.5hrs. I have no doubt that he will settle into 11 hrs eventually.
