HELP! Nap Extensions... is it me?

[Mands01]

Hi - I'm new to this, and am hoping this might be the right board to get some help on nap extensions... I'm so confused! and need HELP!

The main reason I am trying to move to an EASY routine is because my 3.5 month old is constantly OT and is a bad sleeper during the day. I have been trying to work on the nap extensions for the last 2 days and it seems like they are getting worse... is it my fault!? ....

He goes down pretty well to nap; other than fighting me during wind down (which I have asked about on another post)... he is pretty quick to sleep now after a couple of days of pat / shh... he does go down with his paci but this is usually spat out within a couple of minutes and he does not wake for it. He is also swaddled.

Then what I have been trying to do is help him from his 45 min wake ups through to th next sleep cycle.... I tried being there when he woke up - and this did work once but then when I did it again I felt like I woke him up more than I helped him and he never got back to sleep... since then things have just gotten worse!

I tried to leave him to fuss a bit before rushing in .. but he did not settle; so I have been trying to help him with pat / shhh and giving him his paci back... Well! .. the paci then clearly becomes a prop as he closes his eyes and starts to fall asleep but will then wake up crying if his paci falls out... he also FIGHTS his swaddle and just can not seem to get past a very light sleep state.

This last time I tried unswaddling... that didn't work so I swaddled him again, still no joy... I probably confused the poor little man! (I know I was).

So for all naps today I have given up - the first because it was feeding time (interestingly he was actually happy about this and seemed to cheer up once unswaddled - which is why I tried the unswaddle at the next nap!); the second because we had reached 40 mins of trying and had gone past the 1.5 hr nap mark! however he was clearly still tired as he basically had a melt down when I sat down with him... which meant I ended up comfort feeding him off schedule 

Any advice!?
I feel like my lack of confidence and own confusion is probably the main issue!

[Shiv52]

{{{hugs}}}}

HOw much A time is he managing? 

I had great success with going in before my DD woke (so about 35 minutes into the nap).  I replugged her dummy and ssh-patted her until she was back over and that helped the naps extend.  It took a few weeks for her to extend on her own. 

If that didn't work I attempted to extend for 10-15 minutes and if she wasn't sleeping then I just got her up and did a shorter A time before trying for the next nap. 

HTH x

[Mands01]

Thanks... I just went in early and i thought it had worked... but just as i went to leave his room he woke up again .. we were then on and off for 25 mins ... just as he was going to sleep he would fight himself awake again... so I gave in .. he just does not seem to be able to get past the light sleep in the 2nd cycle! ...
Once we got up he was then very OT. So we were back to wind down/ sleep within 10 minutes, and he had a major meltdown before I put him down...
Then I just couldn't get him to sleep, he wasn't crying it was just like I was keeping him awake! ... so I stepped away and left him while I sat in a chair in his nursery... and he just wriggled and struggled .. all calmly... until feeding time! But no sleep!
He fights it SO MUCH!

I'm still very early on the EASY routine and tracking - but over the last 2 days we get about 1hr 20mins A time (on average) but I actually think this is too much given how OT he seems to be.
To clarify that is from when he wakes up (after short nap)...
After today we are WAY off track with timing though 

Did you wait until your LO opened her eyes / wriggled before replugging paci ... or did you do it proactively??
Any more advice would be appreciated!
 

[DSAN]

Take this advice with a grain of salt because we still struggle with short naps, but it did help us extend naps for a few weeks around your DS's age. First what I did was as soon as he woke I popped him into a wrap/sling and bounced him back to sleep. Then after a few days of that I picked him up and rocked him back to sleep and then put him back in his bed. Then after a few days of THAT I was able to settle IF I was in the room when he woke. If I wasn't there to catch him at just the right time then there was no hope of getting him back down without some major APOP. Then I would wait for him to stir and look for his paci (If I tried to do it in his sleep he woke up MAD and would not go back down) before I gave it to him. Then I'd put my face next to his and gently 'shh'

It does sound like your LO is a bit OT (as is mine right now  ), it wouldn't hurt to APOP the 2nd 1/2 of naps if you need to.

And it does get stressful/maddening so take breaks when you need to. Anything new you try will take a few days to work so don't give up! You are doing great!

[Mands01]

Thank YOU...I am definitely at breaking point this afternoon after he has basically missed an entire sleep which he has not done since I started this process
I'm nervous about picking him up because he really does seem to become more awake if I intervene too much... but yet even with the basics - paci in /pat shh.. he still isn't getting back to sleep.

What are some key signs of being OT? and does that make it harder for them to go to sleep?

I'll keep at it... take a deep breath and hope that tomorrow will be better!

PS - what is APOP??
Thanks again!

[DSAN]

Being OT does make it harder to sleep... I'm still working on how to tell if my LO is OT but usually the signs are short naps, waking up cranky, cranky durring A time, and NW... Sensitivity to noise... Things like that.

APOP is accidental parenting on purpose. When you chose to use some 'accidental' parenting techniques to help your babe sleep. Like you might try some APOP if after 10 mins or so you can't get your LO back down.

I know how stressful extending naps can be! I basically quit for a few weeks. But now my LO is so OT... It saved my sanity though to just take a break. Once we get over the OT we'll try again.