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Author Topic: Do I use pat-shh or PU/PD for 12 week old?  (Read 1100 times)

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Offline dnvrmama

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Do I use pat-shh or PU/PD for 12 week old?
« on: August 17, 2011, 17:58:50 pm »
Right now I'm using pat-shh with paci.  It eventually gets him to sleep, but it is taking at least 40 min and I have to pat the whole time and do at least 20 min once I think he is asleep.  He seems to get to the 15 min mark and wake up again for some reason.  My back is killing me!

Also, is it necessary to fade out the paci now?  He only uses it to get to sleep and spits it out before he is fully asleep.  We do have to reinsert every time he wakes up while he is going down, but once he is asleep it isn't a problem.


Thanks for your help!!
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Offline Colin Macs Mom

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Re: Do I use pat-shh or PU/PD for 12 week old?
« Reply #1 on: August 17, 2011, 22:44:30 pm »
PU/PD is intended for 4 mo and older and as a last resort only, so you're not there yet. You're doing really well!! It may not feel like it but you are.

As for the paci - it's only a problem if you think it is, and if you're fine with things are they are, then don't worry about it.
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Jessica
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Offline dnvrmama

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Re: Do I use pat-shh or PU/PD for 12 week old?
« Reply #2 on: August 18, 2011, 02:32:58 am »
Thank you for the response!
 I'm about to give up.  My back hurts so much!  How do you get them to the stage where they don't need you until they are ALL the way asleep?  Do you just keep repeating the whole pat-sh method until it seems like they chill out faster? Every time I test to see if he is ready for me to take my hand off, he wakes up and we have to start all over.
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Offline Colin Macs Mom

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Re: Do I use pat-shh or PU/PD for 12 week old?
« Reply #3 on: August 18, 2011, 18:46:18 pm »
What does he do when he wakes up?
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Jessica
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Offline dnvrmama

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Re: Do I use pat-shh or PU/PD for 12 week old?
« Reply #4 on: August 18, 2011, 19:44:07 pm »
He pops his eyes open, starts kicking his legs, and starts wriggling his arms (in the swaddle).  Most of the time, I have to give the pacifier back to him to get him to relax again, but today, on 2 occasions, I was able just to pat/shh (yea!, progress!).
I'll watch for a triggering event, but at this point nothing stick out.  He will seem completely relaxed and asleep, then his eyes just pop open.
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Offline Colin Macs Mom

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Re: Do I use pat-shh or PU/PD for 12 week old?
« Reply #5 on: August 19, 2011, 19:49:43 pm »
If he's not crying, you should just leave him to it. You can interfere with their ability to self-soothe otherwise. As long as he's wiggling around and such there is no need to shh/pat.
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Jessica
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Offline dnvrmama

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Re: Do I use pat-shh or PU/PD for 12 week old?
« Reply #6 on: August 19, 2011, 21:36:44 pm »
So I wait for him to cry, then start over. Does it matter if I stay in the room? What about his grumpy call for help? (he does that for several minutes before crying, but I've never heard that not escalate into a cry)
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Offline Colin Macs Mom

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Re: Do I use pat-shh or PU/PD for 12 week old?
« Reply #7 on: August 19, 2011, 21:44:01 pm »
Staying the room is tricky - your being there can become a prop if it isn't already. You have to decide for yourself what works for you guys.

Do you know his cries? Just ask to make sure you are responding to the I-need-you cries.
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Jessica
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Offline dnvrmama

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Re: Do I use pat-shh or PU/PD for 12 week old?
« Reply #8 on: August 19, 2011, 22:06:26 pm »
Great, thanks! I guess I was doing that part wrong.  I thought I was supposed to pat / shh for shorter amounts of time until I could just leave without his fussing. But it makes sense to do it all the way through the first time, then just leave him and only do it as needed.

If he spits out his paci before he is ready when first going to sleep he does start to cry.  I just left him with his Wubanub. I hope that is safe! 
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Offline Colin Macs Mom

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Re: Do I use pat-shh or PU/PD for 12 week old?
« Reply #9 on: August 19, 2011, 22:34:01 pm »
Some people do it that way but for some LOs, they don't roll with the shorter time periods. It sounds to me like it would work better for you to do it all the way through and then as needed.
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Jessica
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