extending short naps

[RebekahDSC]

I started my 5 month old DD on easy a week and a half ago.  We were struggling with 30-45 minute naps.  They have improved some, but a lot of the time she still wakes after 30-45 minutes.  I try to get her to go back to sleep and sometimes I am successful while sometimes she "talks," cries, and fusses the whole rest of the time.  I go in and give her the paci (I want to get rid of that thing! ) and comfort her, but I don't take her out of the crib until her hour and a half naptime is up. I wish she would just sleep through.  I believe the problem is her addiction to the paci.  She wakes up after one sleep cycle and realizes it is gone and can't go back to sleep without it.  By the time I come in she is even more awake and it takes some doing to get her back down.  I think she could learn to put herself back to sleep quickly after one sleep cycle if she wasn't reliant on the paci, but she is also still swaddled and I feel guilty taking the paci away when she doesn't have access to her hands or anything.  I'm starting to think maybe we are going to have to get rid of the swaddle, but I am scared. How do I wean her off the swaddle and the paci without making her cry-it-out?  She needs to learn to sleep without me and I am also worried that my constant coming in is turning me into a prop as well!    I know about pick-up, put-down but I think that would confuse her big time because for weeks we have taught her that we will not pick her up out of her crib when it is time to sleep.  I don't want to change that.  Any other ideas?

BTW, here is our easy:

7:00 Wake up (although she often wakes up earlier and we have to try to get her to go back to sleep but often she doesn't)
7:00 Eat
9:15-10:45 Sleep
10:45 Eat
1:00-2:30 Sleep
2:30 Eat
4:45-5:30 Sleep
5:30 Eat
7:15 Eat (Bedtime routine)
7:45 Asleep

Before starting easy she wanted to eat about every 2.5 hours still and I was scared to make her go too long so I also "top her off" about 45-60 minutes after her first and second feeds. I am gradually moving these back until they disappear.  She also has a dreamfeed at 11pm and a middle-of-the-night feed at 3:30am (we had to set these to certain times because she started wanting to nurse 3-5 times during the night.)  Just fyi.  Thanks so much for any help!

[Khalam's Mama]

Have you tried keeping her awake a littel longer before you put her down for a nap?

[creations]

Could you post a real day EASY which shows the times she actually sleeps please?  The EASY you posted looks great as you have two 1.5hr naps and a CN there but this must be your aim rather than what is happening right now if you are getting 45 min naps.

With regards to prop weaning this can be done using BW methods, they do not involve leaving your baby to cry it out although your baby is likely to protest, you would be there with her helping her through it.
With regards to your presence being a prop, this can happen sure, but it is not so hard to wean this.  Many times when a LO becomes an independent sleeper they decide they don't want you there because you are just putting them off sleeping (oh the irony).

[RebekahDSC]

Thanks for the replies!

Khalam's Mama, this actually is longer A times.  Before I started her on easy, I was worried with her 45 minute naps that she wasn't getting enough sleep so I put her down for naps about every 1.25-1.75 hours.  I was told on the easy board to extend her A time.  Originally I extended it to 2 hours (when we started easy she was 2 days away from turning 5 months) and then later extended it to 2.25.  At first it seemed to be getting better, but then she regressed.

Creations, the times I wrote for sleep are the times she stays in her crib.  You are right, though, she is not actually sleeping that entire time. I keep her in her crib and when she starts crying I come in and re-insert the paci and sometimes comfort her for a bit by putting my hand on her chest.  She actually tends to wake up now after 30-40 minutes (often around 34-38).  Lately it seems like she tends to go back to sleep after some help from me for one of the naps and not for the other.  So it probably looks sort of like this:

6something Wake up, parents try to get to go back to sleep but usually doesn't work except for maybe a few minutes
7:00 get out of crib, Eat
9:15-9:55 sleep
9:55-10:45 stay in crib, spit out paci again and again while mom comes in and out, maybe sleep for a few minutes intermittently - maybe not
10:45 get out of crib, Eat
1:00-1:40 sleep
1:40-1:55 stay in crib, spit out paci again and again while mom comes in and out
1:55-2:30 finally sleep again!
2:30 mom comes in and wakes up (or, more recently, opens door to help wake up more naturally), Eat
4:45-5:25 sleep
5:30 Eat
7:15 Eat, (Bedtime routine)
7:45 Asleep

I'm wondering if maybe she is getting overtired because her time awake in the crib is making her A time too long.  I don't know what to do though because if I adjust her naptimes based on her awake times that will mean making the end of the day's A time extremely long unless I add ANOTHER short nap which is what we used to do (4-5 45 minute naps).  Plus, it makes bedtime SOOO inconsistent and stresses me out to no end because I never know if her naptimes are going to coincide with her bedtime!

Can you prop wean using BW methods without pu/pd?

[creations]

At 5 months you should be looking at an A time of around 2hr or 2hr 15 min.  LOs are all individuals of course but use this guidance as a good starting point to guide you.  At the moment you are giving her A times of over 3hrs which is way too long.  40 min naps often mean the A time is too short however in this case I tend to think that she is so OT that she can't relax into her sleep enough to make the transition.
It is very important to note that any time spent awake is A time, it makes no difference where she is or what she 'should' be doing.  Crib time is still A of she is awake.

Having many short naps in a day is a hassle and hard work for you, I realise that, I went through it for a period too, 5 x 40min naps but this is what you need to do to get her on track and prevent OT.  BW is not a strict time schedule, it is a routine so that parents and baby know what is coming next, and it involves listening and responding to your baby's needs.

I recommend putting in as many naps as are needed to get through the day.  After a short nap reduce the next A time a little to account for the missed sleep.  Towards the end of the day be mindful of the time and stick to a pretty regular BT of 7.30pm  Move this 15 mins either way if needed, if the A to bed is getting long go for early BT, if a nap ends close to BT for for slightly later.  When you just adjust BT by 15 mins either way you are less likely to feel as though BT is random and different every night iyswim.  A MUCH earlier BT might be advisable occasionally but this would be the odd time rather than every day being random.
Do your best to extend the first nap of the day as it is then easier to judge the following A and nap time.  E should stay the same through out the day as you have been doing.

PU/PD is a last resort method so yes it is possible to prop wean without, through comforting in the cot.  Swaddle can be gradually weaned (one arm out, two arms out) for instance but this will take longer than going cold turkey and you may need to stay with her to hold through the jolts on those short naps as the swaddle won't be there to do it.

[Khalam's Mama]

I hadn't realised the timings were as they are so was thinking her A was shorter than it is. In that case I agree OT. Though what abot that 1st A time? How long is that? Maybe that is short and then the UT nap leads to OT for the rest of the day?

[~Natalie~]

You can definitely wean without using pu/pd.  In your situation I would keep the swaddle for now and work on the paci first.  You can always just take one arm out of the swaddle if you think she needs it, but people have weaned the paci and left the swaddle before.

I did cold turkey with both my boys and used shh/pat to get them to sleep.  Start with her swaddled and over your shoulder, shh/pat until she is asleep and then transfer her to the crib, continue the shh/pat until she is in a deep sleep.

After a day or so shh/pat with her over the shoulder until just calm and then transfer to the crib and shh/pat to sleep.

If you want to wean the paci this is a good place to start.  You could find the naps lengthen over time once the paci isn't falling out all the time.

[creations]

Thanks Natalie.

Khalam's Mama, I was taking the first A as around 3hrs (from 6 something am through to 9.15am) but if I'm miss reading then there is the chance of UT leading to OT as you say.

Rebakah, how are things going?  Can you clarify that first A for us please?