2yr 8mo old not great with food any more :(

[beckygatt]

My DD1 was always a great eater, better than most her age, and not too fussy at all. However lately she's become more difficult.

One big problem is she is obsessed with milk; she wants it all the time! I don't give it to her too often as I worry it will replace meals but she continues to ask for it.

Another issue is that she won't eat fruit as a snack. I don't offer her an alternative but it seems she'll stay hungry rather than eat fruit!    I manage to get her to have a bit by blending a banana with a bit of milk to make homemade milkshake, but she's not bothered with fruit alone (although when out with other mums and kids she'll happily eat their fruit  ).

At mealtimes if I give her say meat or chicken with some veg she'll just eat the meat and leave the veg, even though we're eating it and even her baby sister is! (baby led weaning). Again, she used to  eat veg a lot more, but is now having less and less. I can't understand why 

I'm getting worried about her health because of all this. Should I start to offer vegetarian meals sometimes? Should I leave her hungry if she won't eat what I give her, or is she too young for that? Often if she doesn't eat her dinner she'll end up having a yoghurt or milk before bed, perhaps I should stop that? I thought seeing her sister eat these things would encourage her but she doesn't seem bothered. And she's quite a stubborn little girl so if she says no I can't convince her!

[Tweakster]

Ditto.  It's a phase.  My kid is a great eater...if it's what he wants to eat.  They tend to enforce their will at this age, and having control over eating is one way to do that.  He spends most of his time pushing food around his plate these days. 

Is she eating at home all the time or is she in daycare?  Kids at this age do listen to their bodies and they should not starve themselves.  I would try though to make at least one thing you know she may eat.  So when you do the meat it's fine, she's eating the meat.  I wouldn't make her a veggie meal in the hopes that she'll eat it because she will probably do without.  Can you get her to accept water instead of milk?  I don't put a limit on how much water my kid gets but I do limit milk and other beverages.

There are some methods of 'hiding' veggies etc.  I think there are some threads on here.  Frankly, I don't have the time or inclination to do that.  I offer, I try to offer reasonable choices, he eats or doesn't eat, it's up to him.

It is really hard though...to watch them not eat.  It drives me insane some days especially since he has been a great eater for a year now.

[beckygatt]

Thanks Wendy! Good to know I'm not alone. It is a difficult age isn't it! She goes to nursery 3 days a week where I send a packed lunch. She has unlimited water and a bit of milk each day. I sometimes give her a non dairy milk when she really whines for nmore, like oat milk. Never squashes or anything else though. Could try hiding veggies more, though as you say time can be an issue. I really hope it is a phase and that she'll grow out of it! I know she likes certain veg, which is why its frustrating

[teilvnav]

This is us, too. DS used to eat fantastically; he would try anything, and his favourite food was curry. Now all he wants is cheese ("two different kinds of cheese please, Mommy") and apple juice, which I dilute with water pretty heavily. And he will rarely turn down a pb&j sndwich. I can't get him to eat supper for the life of me, though, and there are many foods that he now will refuse to even try a taste of. Very frustrating! I am just trying to calmly offer him a healthy variety and not make it a power struggle. It will pass!!!

[Tweakster]

Well to put it in context - we went to a birthday party for a kid who turned 3 the other day.  After 2 full hours of playing at an indoor play centre 3 of the 4 kids didn't eat.  And it was pizza!  The 3 yo, 3.5 yo and a 7 yo girl refused food.  Finn is the only kid who sat there and ate two pieces lol (because it's bread dough with cheese, what's not to like? Lol)...until the cake came out.  And even then most of them ate about two bites of cake and jumped down from the table (it was one of those white cakes with horrible cream icing).

So I think this is totally a universal issue, remember their taste buds really just developed along with their drive for independence.  It's a bit of a lost cause I think lol. Remaining calm and relaxed about it is the best you can do, but don't stop offering.  One day they will take you up on it.

The only time F gets juice is at a party or when I want him to poo lol. Sometimes it works!  Water is his choice though, thank goodness that's one thing we started early that has seemed to stick.

[beckygatt]

Wow Wendy! It seems Finn and my Eleanor are only about a week apart in age! She was born on 26th March. Can't believe they all refused pizza!!

And yes her independence is SO important to her right now. She wants to do absolutely everything on her own. So hopefully that is the reason and it will pass.