Set schedule or go By Awake times?

[iheartcake]

Hi.  I have a quick question?
My DS is 8.5mo.
typlical EASY is:
6:30 wake
7:00 BF (although he doesn't take it)
8:00 solids
9:30 S
11:00 BF
12:00 solids
1:45 S
BF when wakes
4:45 solids
6:30 BF
7:00 sleep

(rarely does it go that smoothly but that's what I'm trying for)

What is the general thought... My LO has a tendency to EW (and NW).  I am trying to sleep train but I'm not sure if I should stick to a set schedule and put him down for his first nap at 9:30 even if he woke up at 5am or put him down 3 hrs after waking.  Same applies throughout the day.  9:30 and 1:45 naps? or follow A time schedule?
Pls help!

Thanks

[nikkinoo69]

Hi,

You have my sympathies!!! I would adore set times and asked exactly the same question - check out responses to my posting, which seems to be... that it can lead to OT, potentially 2 x 1/2 hour sleeps a day. I was recommended to maybe try it for a week at most to see if it works, but I got chicken and decided not to! Clock watching drives me mad, but seems to be the only way at the moment for my LO! Not sure if it does work for others - I guess it must for some??

Good luck whatever you decide!

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

I think it depends on the baby's temperment too...my oldest was fine going by A times until she was 1 and we went to one set nap, but my youngest was very touchy and I basically did set naps from 3 weeks old, and every time she adjusted her A time I reworked what time to set the naps at. 

[jessmum46]

Just tagging along too - have noticed if my LO wakes earlier than normal, even after a good number of hours night sleep, she finds it far harder to settle with her normal A time if (by the clock) it is earlier than normal nap time.  Have been wondering about maybe setting the first nap and then being more flexible with the second?

[iheartcake]

Thanks.  I don't know.  Nothing seems to work with this child.  He's been crying his poor little eyes out for over 2 months.
He's an angel by day but wakes up 4-6xs a night. 
I just don't know what more I can do to help him but this is breaking my heart

I instinctively want to go with A times but end up with totally irregular days.  Maybe I'll try set for a week but yes I fear that I'll end with with a severely OT baby.  Our naps are already haywire.  Can't remember the last time I got 1.5 out of him. sigh.

[scruffymax]

We are doing set naps with my 6.5 MO - although that said, I seem to change the times slightly every week or 2 as she needs more A time!  We're currently at 6:30-6:30 bedtime (she wakes up around 6am but is happy so I don't get her up until 6:30) and then naps at 9:45am and 2:45pm.

Good luck... it's so hard finding what works, and then when you find it, it only works for a few days/weeks and you have to work it out again!

[iheartcake]

I did the set naps today at 9:30 and 1:45 (after a 6:40 waking).  I got 1hr nap at 9:30 but only 30mins for the afternoon nap.
Does this schedule look ok for a 8.5mo old?
Mind, he was up almost all night before crying.  def lost 2 1/2hr sleep in the night from crying.

I put him down tonight early at 6:00.  Asleep by 6:15 but he woke up after only 30 mins. 
I hate this...

[jennandsophie]

HUGS.  This sleep thing just never seems to get easier when you're in the midst of it.  It will one day get better, I promise.

IMHO, if he's still having a lot of issues with NWing, he's got to be a bit OT, particularly if he's losing out on a lot of night sleep.  In this case, I wouldn't do set naps right now.  I would go by A times, but keep them on the shorter side to prevent a day of 30 min naps.  If you know 3hrs or thereabouts works for him in the mornings, I would stick with that so that you are at least getting one good nap a day, instead of stretching it to 9:30am and taking a chance that he gets even more OT. 

That's just what I would do, but someone else may have better advice. 

[iheartcake]

Any advise is appreciated. And that makes sense.  Another point (and i know this isn't an EASY issue) is when he wakes from a nap, should I do ANYTHING to get him to extend it APOP or be strict to avoid confusing him and just get him up? PUPD doesn't seem to work to extend naps.

[jennandsophie]

I think most mums find it gets hard to extend naps as they get older. I haven't been able to do it since he was about 6 months old.  They can also stay awake for longer periods even after a short nap.  However, if you think there's any possibility of extending, then I would definitely do it, as the extra bit of sleep is really important.  Maybe try for 15-20 mins and if it's not working, then get him up.  Keep the A time following more low key as it is supposed to be his sleep time. I have never tried PU/PD with naps, as my DS has reflux, so don't know what the success rate is on that.  I have successfully been able to get him to take a catnap around 4/4:40pm if he did only a short PM nap.  However, I had to APOP it most of the time in the car.

[Lilysmummy]

Hugs :-)) Just an idea, but my DD sounds very similar. He has NW's when his routine is out and I can tell its routine rather than sickness etc as he just cannot get back to sleep, whereas normally a cuddle would be enough. I have found a huge thing with him is if I let him sleep too long on the morning nap - have to limit to 1.15hrs and I have had to DRAG out his A time. He would go to sleep after being up only 2 hours if I let him but I have to gently pull him through to 3 and now I am finding it needs to be more again as EW's have started. It goes against everything you know, ignoring their tired signs to stretch out the A time but it does seem key to everything....