Gradual ways to ensure no sleeps probs happen

[waffling3]

Hi all I have a 8wk old and just wanting to ensure I don't create problems for the future as I ad a tough time with my ds whs two but sleeps fab nw. I regret I did cc and really don't want to do t again.

So basically I'm following her sleep cues she is up only 45mins or 20mins if only does a 20min nap.
I've tried ssshh pat but with paci and it works eventually but without paci makes for a lot of crying.

I read somewhere that its best to do lots of ways to get them to sleep. So first thing after waking and bein up an hr I rock her in bouncer as if she goes to her cot she will sleep 2hrs but not at lunchtime and cat nap so I prefer her to sleep wen my ds does. So I then when she wakes 30mins or so later, take them out for a walk she naps. Come home feed then hold till in light sleep then she stirs as I pop her dwn she then wakes 10mis later and I usually cave with dummy and she will go off for 2.5hrs.
Then the rest of day is 20-30min naps even tho rocking, holding etc.

I do a bath routine and is in bed by 8pm as so tired. Any tips? I try to let her ss and sometimes does after a few mins of mantra cry but once again only cat naps. It's only the one 2hr nap a day when I cuddle or intervene more.

She s v alert always has been. Took me to 4wks to get her to actually ave naps at all. We thought she had colic but it was OT. If I try to shhh pat too much she gets OT and I'm scared we will go back to where we were. She spent 3hrs awake but content after birth! Crazy! Think she's a spirited/textbook as likes bein bathed, undressed etc but quie highly strung and over stimulated and hard to unwind.

Any suggestions thanks x

[waffling3]

Actually re reading the baby types I'd say touchy/textbook. But the paragraph about spirited some things are right. Spouse it's difficult to really distinguish t this age? X

[jessmum46]

Congratulations on your new DD!  Are you familiar with the BW books?

Was she born at term? Any colic/reflux/gas discomfort?

Your A times are a bit on the low side - an average would be around 1h15 at this age: Average A times and "Is my baby ready to increase A time?". In order to take a good nap, LO needs to be tired but not too tired - both OT and UT can lead to short naps, and a day of short naps inevitably causes OT. 

Where do you want her to be sleeping most of her naps ultimately? If your aim is to get her to take naps in her crib, then now is probably a good time to start using shh pat to help her settle there. You can work on one nap a day there to start with, taking other naps as necessary to prevent OT, and then gradually work on getting all naps into the crib. 

It is still early days and it takes a while for routines to become established - and then they change anyway!! So don't be too hard on yourself or expect too much of your LO . I understand that it would be preferable for her to nap when your DS does, but that probably won't always be possible as her sleep needs and routine changes. I don't have specific advice for you there - still only the one LO here! - other than to say to take time for You whenever you get the opportunity.

Feel free to post back with any more questions, hope that helps.

[*Ali*]

I get the sense that you aren't offering the dummy at every nap and BT and just wanted to reassure you that it is perfectly OK to do that. In fact current UK guidelines on SIDS prevention is to offer a dummy every time you put your LO to sleep for the first 6 months. It will help her self-settle.
I know you said you read it was best to do lots of ways to get LOs asleep and while I agree it is handy to have a baby who is portable and can sleep away from her cot, I also know that babies like routine and knowing what to expect. Do you have a consistent wind down that tells her when sleep is expected? 

Lastly I notice you put her to bed at 8 and wonder if that might actually be too late. Are you keeping her day under 12hrs? That would help make sure can get enough sleep and avoid OT.

[waffling3]

Thanks ladies It was a 9pm night before and if I put her down at 8pm she would jus consider it a nap.
Last night I did get her to sleep by 7.30 that's the earliest I can do with two. So should I do ssshh pat with dummy in? Then eventually let ss with just dummy?

Wot happens at 6mo when u take it away? Im trying all naps in cot but a few in bouncer or pram. Last night 7.30pm bed woke 11.30 for feed and again at 3am then stirred at 5am wouldn't go off again even put her in my bed but eventually gave up and OT her up atb6am.

She's jus taken her first 20min nap and is awake nw. I stood with her doin sssh pat and dummy and held hands at 20mins as jolted but didn't work.
I'm goin out at 9.45 so nt worth puttin her down again. I find the stage so hard much prefer toddlers lol. Lots of my friends have never sleep trained and hav fab sleepers? Seems un fair!

Also was swaddling but found her with blanket over ace so decided best to scrap it, it's not made a lot f difference! Also didn't want her to get to used to it is wen rolling u would have to take away anyway x

[waffling3]

Also full term and windy don't think reflux, I think at 5am she wakes coz of wind as grunts on and off x

[jessmum46]

What time did she have that 20 minute nap? 20 mins to me suggests very OT or discomfort.... Have you read this? Reflux 101 - General reflux information and this Alternative diagnoses and Reflux mimics.

Ring any bells? Are you breast or bottle feeding?

[*Ali*]

If you choose to take the dummy away at 6mo you can do it gradually (remove it just before she drops off to sleep) until she is used to going off without it or you can do it cold turkey and help her learn to settle without it. Many babies will spit it out once they have Su ked enough and then fall asleep without the dummy in anyway. That is the ideal and then it doesn't become a prop. Many mamas leave LO with the dummy after 6mo and they learn to replug it themselves.

I can recommend a zip up swaddle like the Woombie or Swaddlepod to avoid LO escaping. It really did work great with my DS2. By the time he started to roll in it he was 8mo and then he started rolling over and sleeping on his side or front when I took it away.

Don't be afraid to use things now like the dummy and swaddle because you will have to wean it. Your LO will be much older then and be much better able to self-soothe than she is now when she just wants the womb recreated it is worth it for 6 months of great sleep.

[waffling3]

Thanks girls, currently she's napping on me! She had a nap at 8am got her totally up at 6.30 she wouldn't re settle but clearly OT!
I've tried gaviscon but doesn't help, the dr won't per tie anything else. But I don't think it is coz she doesn't mind being on her back.

Will continue with dummy for now and try as weeks go by to remove it as she goes off. Read becoming baby wise the other day and it really made me feel crap that I should b doin this that and the other!

In the night she is falls asleep on bottle but I can't stir her and tbh I don't want to lol. First time put her dwn she doesn't so hopefully ok?

May try a woombie I had ok'd at one but v expensive xx

[*Ali*]

The swaddlepod is practically identical and much cheaper but only seems to come in the 0-3mo size. I bought one for a friend whose baby loved it. Maybe go with that to start with and invest in a woombie if you still want one when she outgrows the swaddlepod. http://www.mothercare.com/Summer-Infant-Swaddle-Pod/305674,default,pd.html

Have you tried anything for wind like Infacol?

Babywise uses cry it out to train babies not to cry at night and is opposed to Babywhisperer principles so hopefully we will be a better fit for you. Have you read the Secrets of the Baby Whisperer by Tracy Hogg on which this website is founded?

[waffling3]

Yes I've got it, I'm sort of following the easy but sometimes it's esa. I've bought a swaddle pd off eby thank you for ten pound u can have arms put too or just one. Today I've had more success. Dummy swaddle and a sleep sheep playing the ocean really loud, so basically like me sssshing. Gone off at 7.30 still fought the last nap tho. Slept wo hrs over Lunch and another around 4.30 for 45mins but then resisted a nap so gave up and just bathed and gave bottle.

Thankyou for making me at ease with a dummy and swaddling! Was doubting myself! She spat dummy out once fully gone just now. Xx

[*Ali*]

Sounds great.

I completely for got to mention the white noise! We use it too (waves sounds on my iPod) and it really helped him zone out and also drown out the sounds of an overactive toddler. I forgot to put it on at BT once though and he hardly noticed at this age (15mo).

[waffling3]

It was my two yr olds but nicked it off him lol doesn't need it now. Deffo seems to distract her and as fell asleep I turned it down x