Hello
My 17 week old DS used to be a great napper during the day (I actually had to wake him from his naps to avoid going over 2 hours), and he was an o-k sleeper at night, waking once or twice on average. In the last month however a few events have changed things dramatically: we've had two major overseas holidays in the last few months, the last being at Christmas which involved a transatlantic flight and a 5 hour time difference; he also developed a mild case of eczema on his face and arms; then he had his 3 month vaccinations which left him irritable; this was quickly followed by a cold and congested nose which he still has to this day. (His eczema has improved now thanks to creams). Now that he's reaching 4 months I don't know if maybe early signs of teething are also an issue? He drools a fair bit and has his hands in his mouth. Although saying that he's generally a very happy, laid-back baby (during the day).
As a result of all of the above factors, his sleep has deteriorated dramatically at night, as well as during the day in the following ways:
1) NAPS: He has begun early waking from his naps at around the 30-40 min mark. Sometimes i can settle him back to sleep with his paci and a hand on his chest or holding him in my arms if I catch him early enough, otherwise he's awake for good. (After some research I'm assuming this is because he can't self-settle after coming out of the first sleep cycle?). He's currently on a 3.5 to 4 hour E.A.S.Y.
2) CATNAP: It's become difficult to get him to take a catnap between 5-6pm. I've almost given up on this since the amount of time it takes him to fall asleep then eats into the naptime and then it's past 6 o'clock and getting closer to bedtime.
3) BEDTIME: After a bedtime / wind down routine of bath, quick massage, pjs, book or song he fights his bedtime so much that it can take us 2,3, sometimes up to 4 hours to put him to bed. This is even if I time his BT based on his sleep cues and ensuring I haven't gone more then 2 hours since he last woke up. Initially I thought this was due to jet-lag but now I'm not so sure. If he's seeming overtired or agitated then I drop the bath to get him to bed quicker. Generally, my husband and I have lost patience with BT since it has taken over our entire evening and causes a lot of tension. As a result, we're using all sorts of AP methods to get him to sleep.
4) NWs: Lately he's begun waking every 2 hours, sometimes even every hour. I can see that this is because he's gotten into a habit and not because he's actually hungry. He's slept through the night 3 times in his little life so I know he's got it in him! I think he's lost the ability to self-soothe, plus the fact that I coddle him now, so he wakes up to be helped back to sleep on the breast. (I'm so tired I can't imagine doing anything but being a human pacifier to get him back to sleep. The few times I've resisted breastfeeding him to sleep he's stayed awake for up to 2 hours at night).
5) WAKE UP: Because his nights can be so erratic with different wake up times (and also because I'm so tired!), I'm having trouble establishing a consistent WU. It ranges from 8-9am-ish.
6) CRIB: I can't get him to sleep in his crib anymore unless he goes down asleep. We are so exhausted that we're using anything we can to get him to sleep, including holding, rocking and bringing him to bed. He's now taken my husband's spot in bed. I'm confused whether I can start PUPD now?
In writing this all out I feel like I've listed every single sleep issue that a LO can have and I'm embarrassed that I haven't "tried hard enough" with the BW methods. In short, things have really gone downhill and his routine is all over the map. I'm absolutely exhausted and at a loss for what to do now and where to start tackling all of the problems. Because of his illnesses and the jet lag I felt I had to be extra attentive and assumed that every night waking was a result of hunger or need for comfort due to illness. I feel this has led to poor sleep habits and pros. It's a vicious cycle. Please help! The lack of sleep is affecting my health, my mood and my marriage. My husband and I are on the verge of hiring a very expensive sleep consultant to help us through.
Here's a rough sketch of our E.A.S.Y (though please note that nap, bedtime and NWs change regularly so this is just one example! It seems like he's doing a 4 hour E.A.S.Y...)
8:30 Wake up and feed (although sometimes he's not hungry on waking since he's been snacking throughout the night)
A
10:30-11:00 Nap (Used to sleep up to 2 hours but now usually wakes after 30-40 mins. Unless I take him out in the stroller)
A
12:30 BF
A
13:30-15:30 Nap (sometimes he only sleeps 30-40 mins here)
A
16:30 BF
A
17:30 Catnap (30mins on average. Just one sleep cycle. Sometimes this gets dropped depending on the 2nd nap)
18:00 Awake
A
18:40 Bath and BT routine
19:30 BT (Ideally but this NEVER happens. Actually Asleep anywhere from 8:30-10:30)
Between 10:00-11:00 I try to Dreamfeed but this depends on when he actually falls asleep
NWs 1:30am, 2 or 3:00am, 4:30am (this NW seems consistent), 5:30 or 6:30am
Thank you so much for any insights or help you might have.
