Big jump to increase A time? gradual jump not working

[amom526]

My 5.5 month old DS is stuck on like a 4 month EASY. I have been trying to push out his A times, but he is a little spirited, and it is very hard to deal with him when he is tired. I am also working around older DS schedule, so a little tricky.

His current EASY is:

WU between 6-7
E: 7 usually, but sometimes he has had a night feed around 4-5 so not hungry yet
S: 830-9/915 we are stuck in the 45 minute naps. I think it is part OT part developmental.
E: 930 he is EBF and a big baby can barely make it 3 hours. We have just started solids but not eating much yet
S: 11-1145/12 - He usually wakes after 45 minutes, but I need to wake him at 12 to get DS1
E; 12 or 1245 depending on pickup
S: 1-230 or 130-3 I almost always AP this nap because I am so desperate for a break. I usually put him in the swing.
E:230/3
S: 445/5-515/530 I think he is getting ready to drop this, very hard to get down
E: 530
E: 615 top up
BT:630
NW: btw 930-1030 starving
NW;230 hungry

Sometimes he can have up to 4 night wakings, but he is generally very hungry when NW and we can not re-settle without feeding.

I really want him on a set nap schedule. I would love for him to nap at 9 and at 1, and I think with a 630 WU he should be able to handle that. I am wondering what would happen if I just cold turkey upped his A time by A LOT. His morning nap is so short that I don't see how he could possibly make it to 1 pm, but would he adjust after a few miserable days?

[*Ali*]

If his wake up can vary by as much as an hour from 6-7am then I wonder if he might struggle with a set nap. Have you considered doing a set A time instead of about 2.5hrs? That should mean he is tired enough to do a decent nap.

Have you considered wake to sleep? That worked miracles for my DS1's 45 min naps at 4.5mo.

It can be usual for BF LOs to struggle to make more than 3hrs between feeds until solids are established so I wouldn't worry about that now.

Is he an independent sleeper or does he need you there to get to sleep?

[amom526]

He "can" fall asleep on his own, but conditions basically have to be perfect. He never goes peacefully. At BT he generally will fuss a few times, and need re-settling, but goes to sleep. For naps it is much more difficult. I aim for one nap a day to be independent, because that is all I have time for at the moment. If I get him in the right window, he can generally get to sleep with a little fussing/shh pat.

I have been doing set A times, but I think they are too short. I was doing 1.5 A time after a short nap, and 2 hour A time after any nap 1 hour or longer (very rare). I have been trying to up him to a minimum 2 hour A time after a short nap, but not seeing much improvement. It's difficult with the feeding as well because I can't top him up before naps- he has no patience for let down unless he is really really hungry and does not comfort nurse.

I do think wake to sleep might help, but I have a noisy toddler running around so not sure if I can dedicate the time to re-settle.

I think the biggest piece is the A time. Right now he is taking 4 short naps a day. I think he is OT by the end of the day, and it sometimes impacts his nights. I guess we just gotta keep pushing through! I will try to keep pushing that A out. What do you think is an appropriate shortened A after a short nap?

[*Ali*]

I would have taken about 30 mins off A time following a short nap so at that age that would have meant 2hrs instead of a full 2.5hrs. I agree the A times you have been doing are likely still too short.

Do you have anyone who could help entertain your older one, perhaps at the weekend? Your partner, mum or friend maybe? The two days might help make enough difference for you to be in a better position when back on your own on the Monday.

This thread also has some great ideas for what to do with an older child while settling a baby Settling 10 day old for naps with 2yr old to care for! How?!

If you can get to a stage where he doesn't need you to be there to fall asleep that should help him transition between cycles.