Lots of transitions for a 2.5 yr old!

[Zomeo]

We just moved into our new home a week ago.  Our DD has been having trouble with all the change the last few weeks and jumping out of her crib.  She has been sleeping with us in our bed and hasn't even napped in a week and a half.  She has become very dependant on us for her sleep all of a sudden.
We have now gotten her room together and switched her bed to a toddler bed.  She won't stay in and I am wondering if I what I am doing is even right.

For naps I put her down and she gets out and screams and walks around in her room for 1.5 hrs and never falls asleep.  I stay outside the door and tell her to lay down for quiet time.
At bedtime I lay her down and sit by the bed until she falls asleep which is like in 10 minutes because she is so exhausted from no nap.
Tonight I didn't and she is still sitting at the door screaming her head off as I type...If I do sit by the bed she will look up every 10 mins. to make sure I'm there and not sleep.

Then she will wake in the night.  Last night she woke up at 3am and I put her back in her bed.  I sat by her bed and for the next 3.5 hours she screamed, whined, and sat up and refused to lay down to sleep.  She is one stubborn kid! 
I know there is a lot of changes that have happened but I was don't want to fix a problem while creating another problem.
Do I just continue to reassure from the door?  How long will this last???  She never sleeps it seems and my whole day and night is trying to get her to sleep.  I also want to make sure I am sensitive to her emotional needs with all the changes.
Any thoughts?

[cath~]

Hi there,

Was you LO an independent sleeper before you moved house?
Could you post what your routine was like before then, for comparison?
How much night sleep is she getting atm (what time is BT and WU) given she isn't napping?  Has she tacked on at all?

Sorry for all the qns, just trying to get a picture of the situation.  Your LO might be starting the 1-0 transition.

I think moving house can be quite traumatic for some LOs (we are moving in 2 weeks so will be in the same boat!) and they can need more reassurance, esp at BT again.  The transition to toddler bed also might be part of it. Some LOs can feel much less secure without any 'sides'. Any chance you could go back to a cot for a while until she is feeling more secure again, and then transition to a toddler bed?

When you wait outside her door (eg last night), do you go in at all?  With BW, we would say do not ignore a real distress cry.  Perhaps you could try WIWO (if your LO was an independent sleeper before) and see if that helps?  It might be that you not going in at all is making her more worried when she needs you?

This link gives some more pointers to using WIWO (if your LO was an independent sleeper before) or GW (if not):
Walk In/Walk Out vs. The Gradual Withdrawal Method (HOW TO CHOOSE)

There can also be a sleep regression around every birthday and half-birthday, which could be making things hard too.  My LO had a hard time falling asleep, got quite upset at BT, for about a week just after she was 30 months (2.5 yrs).

hugs

[Zomeo]

She was an independant sleeper before and a dream sleeper.  Napping from 2:15-4pm everyday and sleeping 8pm-8am. 
Now if she skips her nap she falls asleep by 7:30pm and will wake between 6:30-7:30am, but in the night as well.

We stopped the crib thing because she was getting bad bruises on her ribcage from jumping out. I don't think she seems afraid of the big girl bed.  She seems to just want me in the room at all times. ha.
If she opens the door then I do WI/WO.  If she just stands at the door and I calmly but firmly tell her it's bedtime or quiet time and to get back into bed. Should I go in everytime she gets out of bed even if she doesn't open the door?  She grips me so tight I can hardly put her back in her bed.

When I sit by the bed she lays down.  I just don't want that to become the new habit.  Last night I slept on the floor next to crib again when she woke at 3:30am.

[Zomeo]

So we did have some improvement tonight.  After doing Wi/WO she eventually stayed in her bed but did continue to scream and cry.  Should I go in and reassure her or just hang back?  She went on for about 30 minutes before stopping (I was standing in the corner watching but she couldn't see me) and then she crawled onto the floor and went to sleep.
What shoud I do when she is crying but in her bed.  It is an hysterical cry. 

[cath~]

With WIWO you always respond to real distress cries, whether or not LO is in their bed.   You shouldn't leave her to cry if she really needs you.

If LO is really upset you should go in to them and reassure them, eg with reassuring words/pat/rub or whatever you feel will suit your LO best.  Then when they are calm, leave again.

Also, she has had a big drop in sleep recently so I suspect she must be very OT which won't be helping.  Any chance you can APOP any naps to help her catch up (if she won't nap in her bed)?  If not, I would try offering SEBT for a few days, e.g. after a 10.5 hr day and see if that helps.

[Zomeo]

She woke last night at 1:20pm and I did WIWO for two hours.  Putting right back into her bed and comforting when her cry got very needy.  Finally at 3am I told her I would sit by the bed and then for the next 1.5 hours she asked for me every 10 mins. and wouldn't sleep.  Finally at 5am out of exhaustion she came on to the floor with me so we could sleep. 
I feel trapped in a sense with WIWO because she gets so worked up so fast and for so long that I can hardly get her to settle down and I only can by sitting by her bed.  Then if she knows I'm in the room she keeps her self awake to make sure I don't leave.
Can you remind me what SEBT means? 

[cath~]

SEBT is super early bedtime

WIWO can just wind some LOs up. In that case you might find that GW is a better option (see the link I posted above for more details on how to do GW), at least until she is over the OT and generally feeling more settled again.

[Zomeo]

Thanks so much for your advice:)  Hopefully we will all get sleep soon.