16 week old screaming at naps......please help!!

[Newman.jess86]

Hi, we try and work to a 3hr routine but my baby girl is fighting naps so bad that she just screams for ages, despite me trying to pat shush. Even if I pick her up and rock her she just cries as she's so over tired.

Today, she woke at 7am, fed then played. I noticed she looked tired at about 8:20, so put her in her cot, sung a song, told her its nighttime and left the room. She didn't cry straight away, but after 10mins she started crying. I actually picked her up as she didn't calm with me shushing or talking to her. Tried putting her back in her cot, but again had very upset crying. Picked her back up and after rocking and singing for ages she eventually fell asleep....however, I have to keep holding her otherwise she wakes and cries if I put her down, she slept for 50mins. Then feed and activity for hour and a half then took her upstairs and repeated the above...this time she went into complete melt down. Even rocking her dent calm her. So I put her in the sling after half an hour of trying to calm her and walked around the garden and she fell asleep. She's still sleep now and it's been an hour and 10mins.

I used to bf to sleep but have stopped that as I want to help her self soothe.

Everything I try doesn't seem to work and I get a screaming baby! I really want to help her but not sure how. She has just started half sucking her thumb, but not properly yet so I'm not sure whether to try swaddling her, altho she's never been swaddled for naps. At night she sleeps in either a swaddle up or sleeping bag.

Please help as I don't want to leave the house as she gets into these meltdowns! She's a very nosey baby and doesn't want to give in!

Thanks x

[*Becky*]

ok, at this age I would be thinking about moving towards a 4 hour EASY so would start by bumping up to 3.5 hours..
could you post the last 2 days so we can take a look.
x

[Newman.jess86]

Hi Becky,

Today's routine has been a bit strange as we have been out walking a lot of the day....

Wake at 7:30
E- 8, she doesn't like to feed straight away
A- 8:10-8:50
S- 8:50-9:40 (in the car)
E- 10
A- 10:15-11:15
S- she was tired at 11:15 but fought it and cried and I had to put her in the sling. She fell asleep at 11:30-1:15
E- 1:30
A- 1:40-3:15
S- started to get tired at 3:15 but again, crying and wouldn't fall asleep with shush pat or even calm, so tried pram. She slept from 3:50-4:20 but this wasn't a good sleep as she startled and woke lots
E- 4:30-4:45
A- 4:45-5:20
S- she started rubbing her eyes and ears and getting fussy so thought she needed a sleep. Had I rock an shush her along with patting to get her to sleep. 5:40-6:15
E-6:15-6:25
A-6:25-7:30
S- 7:45 - she actually fell asleep quite well. I used white noise as the shushing was makin me dizzy...is that okay? Or should I shush?? I also patted and she calmed in her cot then fell asleep alone while the white noise continued for about 15mins more.

So, she got tired quite quickly after being awake! Especially in the afternoon. I'm not sure how I could exten her awake time, unless I can improve her napping.

Yesterday:

Awake at 7am
E- 7:30
A-7:40-8:50
S- 9-9:50
E - 9:55-10:10
A- 10:10-10:45
S- she really cried and fought sleep again until 11:10. Sleep from 11:20-1:20
E- 1:30-1:40
A- 1:40-2:50
S- 3-3:10 in the car she then wouldn't fall back asleep at home
A- 3:10-4:20 then she started to become tired again
S- 4:30-5:15
E- 5:20-5:30
A- 5:30-7
S- 7pm

All of the naps are hard work and involve a lot of crying!

She also wakes in the night for a feed at 2:30/3am and then won't go back into her cot even with shush pat for a while, so I end up bringing her in with me to calm down and she then sleeps.

Thanks, hope that helps? X

[*Becky*]

ok so what I would do for now is aim for 1.45 A time in the am rather than 1.5 and stick with it for a good 3-4 days before changing anything.
Try to space the feeds out now to every 3.5 hours and if she short naps i.e. less than 1.5 hours or so then cut back the A time by 20 mins or do.
Keep us posted x

[Newman.jess86]

Hi Becky,
Okay, I'll try and extend her activity time, although why would I do this if he is getting tired after an hour and 20 mins to an hour and a half? Will I not just let her get really over tired?

Here is today's routine:
6:15 sleep feed till 6:30 awake
A- 6:30-8:20
Sleep 8:20-9:25 in the car
A- 9:25-10:30
E- small amount 10:30-10:35
A- 10:35-11
Started to be tired about 11-11:10
E- small feed 11:00-11:05
S- 11:10 crying for sleep- in pushchair fell asleep at 11:35-12:10
A- 12:10-12:45
E- 12:45
S- 1:40-2:25 awake for 10mins then sleep 2:32- 2:45 stopped driving!
E- 3-3:10
A- 3:10-4:35 started fussing at 4:10
S- in the sling as crying and fighting 4:35-5:20
E-5:20-5:35
A-5:35-6:50
S- shush pat 6:50-7:15 with white noise

Am I okay to be using the white noise instead of verbally shushing?

Sorry for the questions!

Thanks x

[Newman.jess86]

The first nap has not gone well... Woke at 6:45, fed and then a until 8:20. First yawn at 8:13. Sung songs then put in cot on side and started shush patting. She then arches her back to move and cries a very sad upset cry, so picked her up as the s/p didn't stop the crying. Calmed her after more crying and our her back in the cot...now sad crying, so picked her up and had to sing and pat while a bit of rocking to calm her and she fell asleep on me so put her in her cot and continued patting but she cried immediately, so she's now asleep on me!!

What am I getting wrong? She eventually went to sleep at 8:45. X

[*Becky*]

does she ever settle herself? Just wondering if this is more of a prop issue i.e. she needs you to settle her....

it seems she needs you or motion to sleep so it may be a good time to do some sleep training.

[Newman.jess86]

Hi becky,

She has just started settling herself at night, but the day naps she needs me to rock or walk etc or motion like you say, this has even ever since I stopped feeding her to sleep. I try the shush pat for naps but it doesn't stop her crying (a very upset and sad cry) and even my walking and motion sometimes doesn't help her...which normally means I then have to get the sling and go for a walk. So looking for tips on naps! I tried extending her a time today an she seeme to cope with it, although she was showing sleep signs like rubbing her eyes about half an hour before I got her to sleep. X

[*Becky*]

ssh pat may not stop the crying but you are with her so that is ok....crying unfortunately is part of sleep training for some lo's but as long as you are there it is ok. Wear ear plugs if it really gets to you - it did me!
Do you want to run through how you wind down and settle her and how you are doing ssh pat atm?

[Newman.jess86]

Hi Becky,

We actually had some progress today! Her first nap was in her cot! At night she sleeps in her travel cot in our room but she doesn't seem to like being in there in the day it seems so thought I'd try her actual cot. She showed tired signs after being awake for an hour and a half, i left her for another 5-10mins as you suggested then picked her up and took her to her room, put her in her swaddled up suit, close the curtains and sang a few songs while holding her then placed her in the cot with white noise on. She made a few grunts but not crying then fell asleep after about 5-10mins. She slept for an hour (so past the usual 45mins wake up) but she had her jabs so I had to wake her at that point!

Second nap she didn't settle as easily and I had to hold her while patting with white noise- I noticed she had fallen asleep so placed her in her cot, she woke, opened her eyes for a few moments then closed them again- does that count as self settling or not!? I stupidly checked on her after 25mins and coughed..she stirred but seemed asleep...5mins later and she woke. Couldn't resettle her in the ct so allowed her to sleep on me. We managed an hour and a half in total.

3rd nap...refuses the cot and cried a lot and shuh pat didn't seem to help much, eventually for her to sleep rocking on me for an hour.

Bed she went son and self soothed and I only did a moment or so of shush par before placing her in the cot.

For shush pat I pat the centre or her back an use hire noise. In the day she dislikes white noise sometimes!

X

[*Becky*]

well that sounds much better How have the last 2 days been?