On Monday afternoon a neighbor knocked on my door who I'd never met before. We live in an apartment complex and she said she'd seen me around with dd and wondered if I knew of any local babysitters. She is a single mum with a 17 month old daughter, and works from home which is obviously difficult to do with a toddler. At the moment her daughter goes to her grandma's mon-fri, but grandma is 74 and struggling to keep up with her. I invited my neighbor in and we got talking. She was practically in tears worrying what she's going to do, the father left her when she was pregnant, she's lonely and said she has no social life, she seemed really nice but so stressed. I told her I'm a SAHM and although I have a few friends I would trust with my dd they're not immediately local and wouldn't be able to help during the week.
DH and I have been talking about finances a lot lately and basically we could use some extra money. I thought this seems like a win-win - I offered to help my neighbor out 2 days a week so she can get some work done, hopefully we'll get to know each other and become friends, our dd's have playmates, and I make a bit of money. I told her I'm in no way registered in a child care capacity and my only experience is having my own child so obviously am asking for much less money than a daycare. She seemed so relieved, and asked me if I could take her dd starting this week! So Thursday (yesterday) was her first day with me.
She is a really really sweet little girl. She didn't seem worried about me being a stranger, played happily, ate well and took a nap. All seems fine, except 2 things are really worrying me:
1) Her mum told me that she cuddles her to sleep by lying down on the bed with her BUT that she would be ok in a Pack&play, it just might take her longer to go to sleep. Well, I put her down and that was the only time she was upset all day. She cried her eyes out and I really don't know this kid and how to help her, so I stuck my dd in front of the tv and went and laid down with her. She immediately stopped crying but it took about 20mins for her to fall asleep. I'm really not happy or willing to do this every time she's here and just leave my dd by herself, and I did mention this to my neighbor who said she's working on it already. So I guess I'll wait and see, but that could be a problem.
2) My dd is very social, loves people, plays fine with other kids in her gym class and when we have play dates either at our house or elsewhere. Sharing toys is hit and miss, sometimes very generous, sometimes possessive! I thought she would be fine with this, but I guess the fact that I was the only mom present made a big difference. She didn't mind sharing her toys, but she minded sharing me! She's not usually like that at all, but usually when someone else is in her 'territory' they still have their mom with them taking care of them. She was whiny and clingy even after the other little girl left. Usually if dd is crying about something at this age it's a stroppy kind of protest, but it was different yesterday. She seemed genuinely upset and unsure about the situation. Obviously it's very early days and hopefully she'll adjust, but I don't want this to be a problem for her.
I'm not going to back out of this and will give it a fair go but I'm a little concerned I've bitten off more than I can chew. Any thoughts or am I worrying about nothing?
Sorry this is so long!