4.5 month old EASY falling apart!

[first_time_mommy]

Ok, so we have been going fairly well, but I think it is time for some changes, because our EASY is falling apart! Our problems have been:

Waking early
short naps
SUPER crankiness going to sleep and waking up

I can't really post our EASY, as it is completely inconsistent these days.  I aim for 3-3.5 hrs for feeds and about 1hr45 min A time.  Each day I have been getting shorter and shorter naps.  yesterday, we had 3 naps, each only 30-40 minutes.  Honestly, the last one I had to just lay him down and leave the room, I was short on sleep and could feel my frustration building.  Yes, I totally had him CIO ( and I am not ashamed to say it).

Today, he woke at 6am and I fed (his usual wake up is somewhere between 6:30 and 7:00), but we have been fighting the 5am wakeup time too.  I thought he may be tired still and then he fell asleep while feeding, so I let him sleep until 6:45, when he woke.  I started to put him down again at 8:30.  It has been 20 minutes and he is just laying there, doing a mantra cry.  Nothing in our routine has changed.  Anyone have any thoughts on this?  I am getting very frustrated, because he has begun this new scream/cry that just irritates me to bits.  I feel bad saying this, but it is true...

[*Becky*]

Hi there,
Sorry to hear things are rough right now, I can honestly say that 4-6 months were a terrible time for naps with both my lo's and you are not alone, it is quite common.
As hard as it is please do not let your lo CIO. BW are totally opposed to any form of CIO or CC as Tracy Hogg, the original BW'er believed it breaks trust between parent and child. We can help!

Short naps at this age can be developmental but it also sounds like maybe time for an A time increase. I would try 2 hours in the am and do it for a few days to see how it works.

At this age I would def aim for 3.5 hours between feeds too.

Any history of reflux? More hungry at the moment?

Don't be afraid of the odd bit of AP. Lo is still young and sometimes just getting out and letting lo sleep in the buggy or the car keeps everyone a bit more relaxed. Keep me posted xx

[first_time_mommy]

Thanks for the response.  I am so relieved to hear that at this age, the nap issues are common.

Yes, he is a silent refluxer, we have been on a very high dosage of zantac for awhile now.  His flareups are usually seen during night sleep though, and he acts differently than this.  But, you know how babies are constantly changing

We were trying for 3.5 hours, but then he has started waking so upset, I started nursing to calm him.  With only a 30-45 min nap, this ends up being clost to the 3 hour mark.  He really likes to nurse, and it is such a soother for him.  I even have nursed him back to sleep during a few naps lately.  I am just fearful that I will create a bad situation for us in doing this!  After another day of 3 30 minute naps, I held him for an hour yesterday so he could get a little caught up.  I will try to stick with 2 hours A again today.  I agree with you, it seems like he was ready for it when I tried this last week.  Thanks for listening, it is what I love about this site!

With regards to CIO, I am opposed to it too.  I didn't go into the nap with that intention, but was just trying to get the point across that it was a very bad moment, and I needed to put him down and compose myself (ya know?). 

[amayzie]

it was a very bad moment, and I needed to put him down and compose myself (ya know?). 

This is always the best plan- sometimes stepping out of the room is the best option... you won't be alone in that!

[first_time_mommy]

Ok, so we are now day 5 of only sleeping 30 minutes at a time for naps.  I was able to get him to back to sleep yesterday afternoon but it involved me nursing him and then sleeping with him. I am sticking with 2 hours A time, but do I still do that after a 30 minute nap?  Yesterday he was giving tired cues at 1 hr A time!  Poor kid seems completely confused.  It is also affecting his eating patterns because 3hr or 3.5 hrs is during "sleep" time so I am feeding early, but he's not eating great because he's not tired.  If I don't feed, he wakes up early, seeming famished? 

[*Becky*]

after a 30 min nap I would pull the A time back by 15-30 mins so he does not get OT.
Do you think this is discomfort related? Just wondering whether it would be best to get his meds checked?

[first_time_mommy]

I have been wondering if we need an adjustment on the meds, but so far his behavior just doesn't really add up to that. 

One thing I have noticed is that our mornings are not starting at the same time each day.  I don't really know how to best remedy this.   goes to sleep between 6:30 and 7 each night.  He has been waking anywhere between 4:45 and 8 am. If it is somewhere before 6, I always feed him and he goes back to sleep (otherwise the whole house is awake) If it is past 6 am, I don't feed him, he usually plays until 7 but will sometimes fall back asleep.  Then, I feed.  If I feed him at 6, he will usually fall back asleep until about 7:30, or I even have to wake him up.   I am wondering if I just need to bite the bullet for a week or so and see if setting a wake up time is the best thing...anyone have thoughts on this??  Oh my, as I read this back, I sound like a total nut case...
 
We are trying for 3.5 hr feeds, but he doesn't seem ready.  I am following the directions on the forum and trying to extend...


Last note...what makes this so hard was that a few weeks ago, we had a few short naps, one long (2hr) and slept roughly 11.5 hours at night 7pm-6:30am.  Now, we are up at least 2x a night, strange EWs, and no naps.  Any advice is much appreciated!

[Kelcy]

I have been having the exact same problem! I'm interested to see how it works out for you. I have a pretty strict schedule with my LO our day starts at 6 am with a feed and he eats every 3.5 hours, but has done the same with his naps. At the very best we get 40 min 2-3 times a day and he goes to bed around 8 pm. he refuses to sleep and is very fussy, just wants to be in the carrier all day. How has increased A time going?

[*Becky*]

sorry, i missed your last post - how are things now? As for a start time to the day yes I do think you need to set one if you want a fairly reliable routine.

[first_time_mommy]

Ha!  I have now started a new thread...still fighting these naps.  He rolled over the day after I last posted and I thought surely things would improve.  The NWs have, but these naps are still causing us issues.

[*Becky*]

ok, do you want to keep the new thread and lock this then?

[first_time_mommy]

yep, I think that would be easiest.