HELP! SA or Manipulation??

[mama_tutu]

Hey friends... Thanks in advance for stopping in.

My 19 month old textbook baby girl has slept like a champ since starting her EASY routine when she was 3 months old (minus the normal sleep regressions and sickness, of course). She is an amazing self soother, and has very rarely had trouble going down for sleep or resettling.  Until now.

About a week ago, she starting waking up between 2-4 AM SCREAMING bloody murder and calling for us.  We would go in to check her (making sure she hadn't severed any limbs) and she would settle but then not let us put her down again without starting the screaming again.... this would go on for at least 2 hours, every other night (3 times total). Now the past couple of nights, she has been getting extremely upset from the start when we put her down for bedtime. Last night, it was so late I just ended up APOP-ing and letting her fall asleep on me (which we haven't done for ages... she usually needs her space to soothe herself, but it actually worked). However, tonight when I tried to APOP by holding her, she just wanted to play! So I finally just put her down and said goodnight.... and she's been screaming in her crib for the last 15 minutes.

All that said, she is cutting the dreaded canines. Running a low grade temp and extremely runny nose. Since I know she isn't feeling well, that's why I justified the APOP, but maybe that's doing more harm than good??

Bottom line... as long as she is cutting teeth, do we APOP and just do what we can through this season? Deal with the SA later? (SN: She suddenly started getting upset when one of us leaves the house, too... that's why I'm suspecting SA). OR is she learning to manipulate and this is more of a discipline issue that we need to be more firm? I want to be loving and reassuring, but I just don't want to start going down a path we'll regret, undoing the skills she's had for so long.

Hope this makes sense... I'm a little brain-fried. And 6 months pregnant. HA! Any and all advice is welcomed.

[HenaV]

It sounds to me like you've hit the 18m SR. Our experience of it was very much as you describe. We'd have 2h NW where I'd stand over her cot really worried given she'd always slept really well, self settled etc apart from the usual expected bumps in the road. For us there was an element of manipulation involved. That is R cottoned on to my anxiety, and so started her shenanigans at BT not just in the middle if the night. I think that's when I realised i was being listed. We fixed it using WI/WO. It was hard lines for a couple of days? But we got there. After that itvwas just a case of consistency, consistency, consistency. I stick to her routine quite strictly. Allowed slighter earlier nap and a tad longer if needed to combat OT (my DD is susceptible to OT), offered reassurance a lots of love but at the same time hekd a firm line iykwim.

Teeth won't help. IME it can make LO feel quite vulnerable which clearly is not going to help. We helped R  along where we needed to but were very mindful of not falling into the trap of allowing that to turn into her manipulating our concerns iykwim?

Hth xx