Desperately need help! 8 mo refusing feeds!

[Chaxsahi]

Any advice would be appreciated!
LO will be 8 mo in two weeks. Ebf till 7 mo and used to accept ebm in bottle with no issues. I am going back to work in a month and don't have the option of pumping and I am on call for 36 hrs straight every fourth night so can't do bf anymore although would love to so I have been working on attempting to wean him with minimal luck.

He learned how to use a straw cup and will accept bottle too reluctantly! However he only take 2 oz willingly and 3 if I coax him for a little bit! In a 24 hr period he was taking six feeds, four day feeds and two night feeds. I try to add formula to his solids. I was able to replace his day feeds with formula over last three weeks and last night I tried to give him bottle at night! He screamed for an hour! Was up three times during the night but won't even accept the bottle near his mouth.

This is what his routine looks like
Wake- 6/6:30
E 7:00 milk 3oz, hr later solids 1 tbs cereal with two oz milk 1 tbs veg, fruit and finger food but mostly plays
with it.
S 9:30-11
E 11 milk 3 oz , hr and half later: half tbs cereal with one oz milk with half tbs fruit with finger foods
S 2/2:30-3:30-4
E 4:00 milk 3oz
Dinner 5:45/6 1 tbs cereal with 2 oz milk 1 tbs veg 1 tbs fruit with finger food
Bath 6:15
Used to be bf before bed switched to bottle since two days accepting only one or two oz!
Sleep by 6:30/45
Two night feeds at 11ish and then 4ish

So yesterday I attempted to wean the night feeds in thought of increasing his daytime intake, he starved for 12 hrs and the day before his milk intake had not been great so this morning I was hoping for an eager hungry baby gulping down milk! But he woke at 6:15 and got busy playing at 6:30 as usual took 2 oz and then I had to coax him for more!!!!! Around 8 for his solids he got impatient by 7:50 and eagerly gulped that down!!!

Things I have tried till now:
Mixing bm with formula while weaning to increase acceptance, no luck
Grandma, DH offering bottle during day/night: same reaction
Tried different formula, no luck
I have not tried different nipple as he used to take playtex only in the past with no issues
Tried feeding him at different spots in the house with minimal distraction

He only takes avg 18-20 oz in 24 hrs with lots of effort on my part! I worry about it all day and last night and this mornings behaviour really threw me off!!

Is there anything I can do to improve his milk intake?
Or do I leave him be !!!
Should I stick with bottle or straw cup for feeds??

Also at 6 mo he weighed 16 lbs 14 oz and at 7 mo it was 20 lbs 6 oz!! He went though a growth spurt!

Any suggestions would be appreciated! Thank you for taking the time to read

[Jodes112]

Hi hun,

Just wanted to post some hugs sounds like your pulling your hair out at the moment!

I never bf so havent really got any advice on that side of things, however, my dd has always been on the low side of formula intake, she would take max 5oz per feed (4 in day, no night) before solids, and when i introduced solids it dropped to 3/4oz per feed.

At 7 months i ended up dropping to 3 formula feeds in the day. And in turn, this increased the intake. She was having 4oz on wu, 3-4oz at 11.30/12, 2oz at 4pm and then 4oz before bed. (And adding around 3oz into food)

When i split up the feeda further, she took more, for a good few months it worked for us. She was doing 4oz on wu, i moved lunch to 11.30/12, and then bottle at 2pm before pm nap. This increased to around 6oz, and then the bedtime one was around 5/6oz. And again around 3oz in food.

how would you feel about trying to space out the feeds further in hope that he takes more?

[Chaxsahi]

Thanks that sounds like something I could try down the line! Things have gotten worse here during the day! He is literally on a hunger strike! By switching the night feeds to bottle he MADE me stop his night feeds as that was never my intention I know he is sustinant on them but if he won't accept the bottle I can't go back to breast as I would have to face this sooner or later when I am back at work!!! He is a very associative baby and is now not able to play even after a good nap and is pulling at the clothes on my chest asking for breast! I feel like killing myself for doing this! But I can't go back to breast as then I would have made him starve/cry for 20 hrs for nothing!!! He is damn hungry but won't take formula!!

And thankfully as I was typing this he took 4oz from gradma in a bottle, thank heavens! Hope the strike ends here! I will keep sending DH in a night wakings. If this pattern continues I will try spacing the feeds as suggested!

I read that memory recall at this age is 3 days so I'll give it a try till then but I wonder if a baby can ever for get breast!!!! It's so hard wired! I am at loss of ideas if he doesn't take formula (

[Jodes112]

Oh wow such a struggle for you guys!

Im sorry i cant offer any advice on breast to bottle, just hope that he has finally given up the strike like you said!

Good luck & hope he gets the hang of it asap. (Did not know that they had a 3day memory lets hope thats right)

Xx

[Chaxsahi]

Hi ladies, wanted to post an update and a few qs

The hunger strike ended after about 16 hours he took bottle from grandma. He will also take bottle from me now but his intake per feed is only 3-4 oz!!! And he has been refusing bedtime bottle for the last three days. His average milk intake now is about 24 oz in 24 hrs! Better than where we started out!
This is what his routine is now:

6/6:30 awake
7:00 milk 3-5 oz
8:15 bf 1 tbs cereal with 2oz milk veggies fruit
9:15- 10:45/11 nap
11:15 milk 3-4 oz
12:45 lunch half tbs cereal with one oz milk fruit finger foods
2:00-3:30 nap
3:45 milk 5-6 oz
5:45 dinner 1 tbs cereal with two oz milk veggies fruit
6:15 bedtime routine bath cuddles bottle (refuses or only one oz)
6:45 in crib sleeps within 5-10 mins usually
Two night feeds (3-5 oz)which could be anywhere from 10pm-2am for first and 3-5 am for second

How can I get him to take his bedtime bottle so he gets a reasonable night sleep? He sleeps a 6-7 hr stretch without feeding easily as he used to do it in the past but his bedtime bottle refusal still leads to two night feeds!! Yesterday I moved his dinner up to 4:30 and he still reluctantly took 2oz at bedtime! He seems to get irritable with the bottle being offered at bedtime!!! He used to love breastfeeding ( he never had feeding to sleep association which I guess is good but now he won't drink at bedtime! Any suggestions would be very much appreciated. Am thinking of cutting down one daytime feeding in hope of more satisfying three day feeds but am scared as he is already low on his milk intake. If i do go down that road which feed should be dropped?

When should I attempt to wean the night feed?? I have five weeks before I return to work. With my crazy hours if we continue like this i will be a walking zombie!!

Thanks

[Lolly]

If I am reading this right he is getting about (on the lowest amounts) 24oz a day plus one breastfeed at 8.15? Yes? That's actually an ok amount of milk for his age, with the breastfeed he is probably getting closer to 30oz. The minimum recs are 20oz a day from 6 months which includes the milk in food.

I would try cutting the cereal down first and see if that makes him take a better bedtime bottle. Cereal is really filling and there is actually no nutritional need to give it at every meal. I only gave cereal at breakfast, the other meals at 8 months for us were some puree and finger foods. If you only offer finger foods at dinner you may find he doesn't eat so much so is hungrier for his bedtime bottle.

You can wean the nightfeeds by reducing the bottle by 1oz ever 3 nights until you get down to an oz or so and then just offer water and resettle. I would work on one first and then the other but it's up to you if you do the 2 together or one at a time.

What do you think?

Laura

[Chaxsahi]

The bf at 8:15 is breakfast sorry about the error! He is completely on formula feeds now via bottle. I will definitely try cutting down on cereal at supper, I thought if he is full will be less hungry and more chances of sttn but bedtime bottle refusal has led to that being counter productive! And I think he is more thirsty at night rather than hungry. Yesterday I offered him the bedtime bottle just before bath he took 3 oz and required only one night feed at 1:30 am.

He is a very associative baby and as soon as the bedtime routine starts he is frantically rubbing his eyes and just wants to sleep! Also the fact that he is not hungry probably make the bottle a struggle after bath!

So should I then leave him on four day feeds and one night feed? Avg intake is about 4oz per feed and four oz added to food so he gets somewhere about 25 oz per 24 hours, if that's not lower end of normal makes me feel better

Thanks for your suggestion Laura, cheers

[Lolly]

I would leave him on 4 day feeds for now, bottle fed babies are normally dropping to 3 day bottles around 9/10 months.

There are more fats and calories in his milk than in cereal, so if he fills up on cereal he won't take so much milk so gets less calories overall. More milk will keep him fuller for longer than early solids! I would cut out the cereal at lunchtime too, and see if that helps, you can add protein to his meals which will fill him better than cereal too.

If it works better offer the bottle before and after bath, it may help to get a bit more into him.

Laura

[Chaxsahi]

Hello again,
I have made very little success with the bedtime bottle if anything. Here is our current schedule:

6/6:30 awake
7:00 bottle 4-5 oz
8:00 breakfast
9:30-11 nap
11:15 bottle 4 oz
12:30 lunch
2-3:30 nap
3:3:30 bottle 5 oz
4:30 last solid meal
6:00 bedtime bottle 3-4 oz
6:10 bath bedtime routine cuddles
6:30/7 bed
Two night feeds could be pretty much anywhere in the night!!! 10:00-4:00

Whenever he wakes at night if I pat him back to sleep he settles but wakes up often till I feed him! He drinks hungrily at night and gulps down the 5 oz I give him! During the day he takes 2 oz with interest and the rest if by coaxing him or distracting him with toys!!!

Am thinking I have to make some change in order to increase his daytime Intake and reduce night feeds. Any suggestions on how to do this??? Things crossing my mind are:

Should I start diluting his night bottle? Basically night wean so he is more hungry during day?
Should I drop the 3:00 feed so he takes more at bedtime?
Should I do the above listed together or one by one and if one by one which one first???

I have reduced the feral in his meals a lot, totally out at lunch and halved at supper, added more protein and all that has definitely helped with bottle acceptance but overall the situation is still hit or miss because of the night feeds! Last night he took three feeds and dranks 15 oz overnight which is pretty much what I can get into him all day so hasn't been very hungry today !!!! Feels like a vicious cycle or a dog chasing it's tail!!! please help

[Lolly]

Have you tried giving the bottle after the bath instead of before? He will probably be hungrier after the bath and it's a longer gap from dinner.

With the nightfeeds you have to decide your plan and stick to it really. He doesn't need 3 feeds, and he really shouldn't be that hungry for feeds at this age. I wouldn't dilute the bottles as you are still giving a volume of liquid and you want him to learn to sleep with less in his tummy. The best way is like I described above - drop 1oz every 3 nights.

I would pick a time that you aren't going to feed him before, say 2am, and if he wakes before just resettle him with PU/PD. Then once it gets to 2am you feed him a bottle and then resettle but don't feed him again until morning, just resettle. I would do this for a week or so to establish only one bottle between sleep and wake up and then start reducing the bottle gradually.

You will have some rough nights, but if he does go a bit hungry for a night or two he will be fine. As you say, you need to break the cycle and until you stop giving him milk at night he isn't going to want it in the day.

What do you think?

Laura