Are we expecting too much for a 3 week old?

[RebekahDSC]

DS is 3 weeks today and we are really struggling with daytime sleep. Night sleep is usually pretty good - 3 night feeds between about 9pm (it is supposed to be earlier but he fights that, too)and 8 am and usually he sleeps through the rest of the time. But daytime is soooo hard! We've been trying to get him to do 1 or 2 naps in the stroller (stationary and lying down, like a crib) and for awhile that worked ok but now I think he is more aware and is starting to want to be held or moved (in the carrier or car) for every nap. If we try to get him to sleep some other way he fights it until we pick him up and by then he is insanely overtired. Are we expecting too much trying to teach independent sleep to a baby so young? Should we be trying, or just carrying him all the time at this age?

Also, his tired signs are SOOO hard to read. Sometimes he yawns and I take him immediately to bed but he still fights it. Other times he shows no tired signs but I put him down anyhow because he has already been up for an hour and 10 min. I know a time for a baby his age is supposed to be like an hour from eyes open to eyes closed but he doesn't act tired then, or sometimes ever. I'm definitely having a hard time figuring out what he needs.

Thanks so much for any help.

[scruffymax]

Sounds like both my 2 at 3 weeks old!  I would try to relax a bit more - he is probably way too little to learn independent sleep and definitely too little to worry about bad habits.  Not much help when you are tearing your hair out trying to get him to sleep, but I would just go with whatever works at this stage.

[RebekahDSC]

Thanks! Glad to know it is normal!

[Buntybear]

I would say at 3 weeks just go with the flow  get those cuddles in! Plenty of time to sleep train and I would say much nearer 3 months than weeks  At 3 weeks they are still getting used to not be part of you and still need you close by.

[clazzat]

I read the title of your post, and before I read what you had written I thought "yes - you are expecting too much"! They are so tiny at this point that expecting anything of them at all is expecting too much - at the moment what he needs is lots of cuddles and a mama who is there for him. There is plenty of time to start worrying about routines and so on, so snuggle in with him and enjoy it. Do you have a sling? That was always my best bet with my second two when they were tiny as they could have a good sleep and I could get on with other stuff.

That said, it might be worth going by the clock a little for a few days to see how he gets on - tired signs can be pretty unreliable, so waiting on them often means that you miss them and they are too wired to drop off by the time you put them down. I'm guessing that you haven't quite figured out what type of baby he is yet, but spiriteds and touchys often only show tired signs way way past the point of ot so a bit of clock-watching can help you work out what will work for him.

[greatwhitenorth]

We are in the same boat. Our baby boy would eat then sleep throughout the day until 3 weeks. Then all of a sudden he is more alert and not going down after a feeding or on his own. He is isn't fussy and doesn't cry, he just won't sleep. Once he becomes over tired then he will fuss a little.

I am afraid he isn't getting enough sleep throughout the day and sometimes trying to get him to sleep and feeding times get crossed and I'm confused whether he is hungry or just tired. He sleeps fine through the night, waking only to eat.

I hope this doesn't last to long

[clazzat]

Greatwhitenorth - why don't you start a post on the easy forum and you can get some ideas/input from others?  That way you can get some advice that will fit with what's happening for you - that's how I got all the great advice I have had here! 

[bongabees]

We are in the same boat I was just about to post the same question! 3 week old, sleeping fine in the crib til now and at night, but just started fighting the daytime naps when I try to do 4s and sshh/pat. She nearly drops off then starts wriggling madly and screaming. I pick her up, settle her again and either put her back down to try again, whispch sometimes works, or she just falls asleep on me. It is good to know that the advice is not to worry at this early stage. Thanks!