How flexible should I be with EASY?

[Aromy]

Hello. My DD is 27 weeks (corrected age 21wks) and I'm a new mom. We've been on a 4 hour EASY for a month now. It has definitely given our lives structure and a little bit of peace of mind. We started sleep training with PU/PD two weeks ago, and it has been quite rocky because she is spirited and touchy (best of both worlds!). We can get her to sleep in less than 10 minutes now, but she still wakes up frequently at night, and at the 30-45 minute mark during naps.

I'm sure some of these things can be fixed by tweaking our routine, and I know I should be more flexible with the EASY routine, but I really don't know where to start. Maybe I'm a bit of a control freak, but I really do try to watch her cues and the clock. If I add more activity time, won't that eat into her nap time? And then therefore move her eating time? Is it the eating time that should always stay the same? I just don't know what should be "flexible" according to EASY.

Our current routine:
E – 7:00 – Wake up and feed
A – 7:30 – Activity
S – 9:00 – 1 1/2 – 2 hr nap -- I usually have to PU/PD once or twice

E – 11:00 – Eat
A – 11:30 – Activity
S – 1:00 – 1 1/2 – 2 hr nap -- I usually have to PU/PD once or twice

E – 3:00 – Eat
A – 3:30 – Activity
S – 5-6 Catnap (30-45 mins)

A - Bath
E – 6:30
A – 7 Story & quiet time
S – 7:15 – Bedtime

8:30 Dream Feed 1 to tank her up for the night

10:30 Dream Feed 2

On a good night she wakes up after 3 am. I'll do PU/PD, but if I'm still doing it after 30 mins it usually means she's hungry so I'd feed her. Any tips, advice, suggestions, or thoughts would be really helpful.

[Buttonbobs]

Hi there and welcome

EASY is quite flexible, not just day to day but also as your child grows. The A time that is suitable for a child of 6 months is different from that which suits a newborn and also a 2 year old. There is a link here to the average A time for different ages:
Average A times- BOOKMARK ME!

So in general the A time you are aiming for at the moment is quite short for 27 weeks. You are doing the right thing by trying to follow her cues, but these cues can become less reliable as an LO gets older, they can seem tired when in fact they are bored, hungry or just having a yawn for no reason.

A 45 minute nap is a sure sign that an LO needs a longer A time and that they are going down for the nap too early. The trouble is once you have a short nap (less than 1.5 hours) the LO is not so well resorted and needs a shorter A time before the next nap to prevent OT building. Those NWs you are getting and the 30 min naps you are seeing are signs of OT. The only way to get out of this UT/OT spiral is to lengthen the A times.

You are right that this will push the feeds further apart, but this is ok as you move towards introducing solids at this age too. Some people (particularly if BFing) would add in a top up feed but if you do this make sure you keep the feed away from the nap so you're not feeding to sleep.

Can you try lengthening that first A time by 15 mins and holding it for 3 days before lengthening it again. If you get a good long nap without needing pupd then you can stick with that A time, otherwise you might need to extend again. You can then do the same for the other naps.

If you get a short nap (less than 1.5 hours) you will need to shorten the nextA time to prevent OT, perhaps try 20 mins less than the full A to see how you get on.

Eventually you will move to dropping the CN completely.

Have you seen these sample routines for the age group?
chronological EASY samples, 4-6 months

What do you think?

[Aromy]

Thank you for the reply Naomi!

I read it right before I was about to put her down for a nap, so I waited until 9:15. Though she was showing cues around 8:45. She went down without a fight, but still woke up around 10. I had to do PU/PD to put her back to sleep.

Currently, she also has a cold. I use an aspirator to suck out the snot, but then she'll go down crying, which creates more snot, and she'll cry some more because she can't breathe, so I have to suck it out again. It's never-ending sometimes! 

We just started introducing solids this week. It's just a few tsps of baby rice.

I will try putting her down at 9:15 instead of 9 for the next few days and see how if it stabilizes (esp. bc of this cold). And if it doesn't, I'll add 15 more mins. I suppose it's kind of crazy to think that babies can be UT! I feel like I've been stuck in this OT cycle forever. That's probably why we were putting her down with such short A time. 

Btw,  in the link for Average A times, "awake time" is including feeding time isn't it? Because aren't they technically awake during feeds?

Thanks for all these useful links! I will keep you updated.

[Buttonbobs]

I read it right before I was about to put her down for a nap, so I waited until 9:15. Though she was showing cues around 8:45. She went down without a fight, but still woke up around 10. I had to do PU/PD to put her back to sleep.

It can take a day or so for an LO to get used to the changes, so yes I would expect it not to work straight away. And also, the new time might not be quite right so if you're still get 45 min naps in a few days then you might want to stretch the A time further.

Currently, she also has a cold. I use an aspirator to suck out the snot, but then she'll go down crying, which creates more snot, and she'll cry some more because she can't breathe, so I have to suck it out again. It's never-ending sometimes! 

(Hugs) it is indeed never-ending at times Can you try using the aspirator further away from sleep time so that she is not so upset by the time you put her down? If she is struggling a bit with breathing this will impact on her ability to sleep through sleep cycles so bear this in mind.

Btw,  in the link for Average A times, "awake time" is including feeding time isn't it? Because aren't they technically awake during feeds?

Yes, A time is from eyes open to eyes closed so includes the E times.

[Aromy]

Today has been chaotic in our household, but I'm still trying to stay on track in extending her awake time. In the process of mapping out and taking notes about extending her A time... I realized that I had been keeping her on a 4/5 month schedule because that's how old she was when we got started with EASY. But now she's 6 months! How time flies due to sleep deprivation.

Then I also realized that she may be in the midst of the 3-2 nap transition! Ahh! It feels like all these rules for the routine are happening at once for me! I can't help but feel a bit overwhelmed. 

[Buttonbobs]

Hugs honey, it can feel a little overwhelming, but try to take it a step at a time. Just extend that first A by 15 mins for three days holding at the same length and then extend again. Once you get to a more appropriate A time then yes the Cn may disappear but it will happen gradually so try not to be too afraid of it.

I felt quite a relief once the CN had gone, it was always an effort to put my Dd down for it and for so little time asleep. Here to hold your hand during the process xx

[Aromy]

Naomi! I just wanted to send an update, so yesterday and today, after 2.5 hours of awake time, my daughter slept right through her morning nap for 1.5 hours WITHOUT waking up in the middle of it. For the first time that I can remember!

Last night we put her to bed at 7, and though she woke up after an hour later, she was easy to put back to bed. After her tanking up feeds at 8:30 and 10:30, she didn't wake until 6 am this morning! We did PU/PD, and woke her up at 7. She was so happy after a full night's rest.

We're still working on her afternoon nap though. She still wakes up in the middle of that. But it may be due to her congestion. We've had to use the aspirator a few times these days. Luckily, this cold is almost over. Then we'll see if she can sleep through it. If not, I'll try W2S.

We've also managed to cut the cat nap without any problem. I just watched her cues, and if she was okay with staying awake for three hours, I just made sure that we spent a good amount of time winding down so she wouldn't become overtired.

I hope this is just the beginning to a brighter more rested future! Thank you for helping to save my sanity Naomi!

[Buttonbobs]

Aw what a lovely update - you did all the hard work honey good luck for the afternoon nap xxx