Help and encouragement needed for sudden and drastic changes in sleep

[LittleLegs]

Hi

LO is 12 wo and over the past week his sleeping habits have ridiculously changed for the worse. Since birth he has woken just once in the night (bed at 7pm, DF at 10:30 and up at 6:30/7am) usually around 3am for a feed. However over the passed week or two night wake ins have increased by the day. He did have a sickness and diarrhoea bug which resulted in us giving his dummy when he woke in the night which we had always refrained from doing.

He has always gone to bed at 7pm beautifully without any need for shush pat or dummy. We haven't ever swaddled either due to the heat when he was born and him sleeping really well (until recently!!).

We have now made the decision after tiring immensely from replugging his dummy from his flailing arms and him still trying to ram his fingers or fist in his mouth even when the dummy's in to stop giving the dummy at night. He never needed it before he was ill so why now. I'm beginning to think its become a massive prop so quickly. Nonetheless I intend on continuing to give for daytime naps which has a different routine (posted on the prop board this morning and after helpful advice this was the suggestion).

So tonight has been the worst yet with him waking at 8:50pm I decided to go in and introduce the shush pat to him so picked him up but not swaddled and his weight proved hard for me to hold and do while he was really fighting it as if he hated it and his cries ramped up to proper screams which I have never heard from him before as he's never really been a crying baby, more of a whinger for attention. I kept putting down when he settled a bit but he rared up again almost instantly so u picked up again but then he seemed to hate it and continued to scream (he's not the most cuddly baby and doesn't like being held lots).

My partners up the continuing this and the cries are less frequent and he's settling in his cot longer when pd before crying again (it's been 1 hr 15).

I would really like reassurance that were doing the right thing and any support or encouragement or likely results this will lead to. It's as if he hates shush pat but I don't know and it's taken ages, never heard him cry so much and why is he all ova sudden waking so frequently after being such a good sleeper since day 1?

Really look forwards to your comments. Thank you in advance. (Desperate and disappointed) xx

[Haribo2012]

Hugs Hun don't be disappointed these things can take time.

Do you think he could be hungry, maybe a growth spurt or does he suffer with any wind/reflux?
Some babies don't like shush pat, maybe adapt it a bit and do rubbing or just pressure on chest and hips?

Will he sleep if rocked to sleep? If he's got OT he might be past self settling...I used to shush pat up on my shoulder but patting DS bum.

Can you post your EAS so we can look at your day? x

[LittleLegs]

Thank you Zoe for your reply (I've been constantly checking all day!!).

It just seems odd that since day 1 irrespective of how a day has gone and how many sleeps he's had etc he's known the difference between day and night and slept like a dream. I think you might be right re. Growth spurt as he was ill so put himself in a diet for half a week so he's been bulking back up again the past week. He's a little boy that will only have milk if he's hungry though, he's not greedy and wouldn't take it if I offered it to him so I don't offer it in the night now unless I know it's been about 4 hrs since his DF so I know he won't mess and refuse it.

He's a chronic cat napper, as was my first son. He'll often have a good sleep around lunch time but it's hit and miss whether he will or not so he does get OT in the day but like I say he as never previously had a problem and is quite a cheeky happy baby but touchy at the same time (he whines and smiles at the same time sometimes!).

A good afternoon nap day looks like this but obviously this is approximates:
6:30 - 7:15 awake
7:15 E
8:30 S for 30 mins
May sometimes have another 30 mins S after some A time
11:00 E
12:00 - 14:30ish S
15:00 E
16:45 S for 30 min or 45 min
18:15 bath
18:30 E
19:00 S
10:30 ish DF
Usually feeds in the night between 3am and 4am and goes straight to sleep after.

When he doesn't have a long afternoon nap he tends to have something like a 30 minute nap every 2 hours thought the day.

He sometimes gets wind but he's actually quite good at getting his wind up. Last night when we had tears for over an hr though he's had chronic wind today and has been sick several times, a couple of times just waterey (he's not a sicky baby at all). He's not a baby that likes being held a lot which is probably why he doesn't seem to like shush pat but that could be me just thinking he doesn't when in fact he might be upset about something else! It seemed worse shush patting him than leaving him to fuss on his own. Perhaps I should just rub his side or tummy to let him know we're there. His arms seem to wake him up and his fists go to his mouth and then he's awake. I think he cries for the dummy so we're going cold turkey at night times as replugging was becomming a joke and he was forgetting how to self settle which he seemed to be able to do fine before he was ill and we introduced the dummy at night times.

x

[Haribo2012]

No probs been a busy day....It might just be a combination of things really, the fact that he's been ill has made him more tired than normal, possibly hungry maybe tummys a bit bloated after the illness and giving him some pain and then if he's had a bit more attention when he's been poorly it can become a bit of a prop.

I'd say he's OT from all of it and prob finding it harder to settle.

Maybe try making his day a bit shorter if naps are short to see if he will settle better, what about sitting next to cot just rubbing his cheek or hand instead of cuddling and just humming a song.

Do you use white noise? x

[LittleLegs]

No never used white noise but if I'm hoovering or drying my hair in the day it really seems to send him off or relax him. If he has another screaming episode then I'll perhaps download something and play that. We'll try and ignore him and try and get him to self settle in the night without us and definitely not the dummy but if he screams I'll just go in and reassure him without picking him up. Part of me wanted him to learn a cue like shush pat so we can use it for many months to come like to soothe back to sleep when teething or something, hopefully a back or tummy rub will do the same.

Hopefully it'll correct all this change that we've been at a loss what to do.

He's going to be a nightmare teether, I can see it already. We never experienced any of this with DS1 so I feel like a new mum all again. It's tough because we had it so easy with DS1 so maybe I'm wrongly comparing the children who are completely different already. Was hoping for another contented sleeper and eater!!

I'll see what the next week brings and post back. Thank you again. x

[Haribo2012]

White noise was fab for us and I downloaded the app, still use a fan noise now for early evening when we are noisy.
Mine was a nightmare teether too!
Fingers crossed and keep us posted x