4month flipped a switch

[Chocawhit]

My little girl was an easy baby. Not bragging. She was happy, has been on EASY schedule since a couple weeks old. She was 3 weeks early so she slept nearly around the clock for 2 weeks. About 3 days ago that all changed. She is 4months (will be 5months on the 19th). I was able to put her down in her crib and she would fall asleep, and stay asleep for her naps. Napping for 1.5 hours minimum.

Now she won't fall asleep on her own. I have to shush pat, and she sleeps for 45m or less. And once she wakes after that first time she wakes every few minutes. She is grumpy now. I have since the change been shifting from her awake time being 1.5hrs to 2. I just don't understand what is going on. I don't like that she is now not falling asleep on her own and then waking so frequently. Here's how today went.

7:30 - wake her and eat
8:00 - A
9:15 - s
9:55 - wakes up and I get her back down with ssh/pat or just putting my hand on her. She then sleeps/wakes up every 5-10 minutes
10:45 - Eats and A
12:45 -S
1:20 - wakes up and the battle begins again.
2:35 - done with the yoyo sleep. Eats and actvity
4:20 - s
4:45 - wake and no getting her back down.
We will bath at 6:30 and bed after that. Because her nap was so short this is now a huge stretch, but I don't know what to do.
She will wake again at 8 and we will yoyo for the next 1-2 hrs. 

She has always done the 8pm thing. She had colic and it started at 8pm every night until she was about 3m . It's no longer colic (I can soothe her easily), but she still wakes every night at this time.

I just hate seeing my little happy girl be so unhappy. What am I doing wrong? My older son was a hopeless case I thought until I emplemented the PU/pd method, and then he was able to sleep through the night. So I am a huge believer.

Help me get my girl happy again.

[ireneasheard]

Hi there

THey talk about the 4 month sleep regression but it is not always at 4 months.... ours happened at 5 months. At this age my son was already doing 2 hours awake time and it was creeping upwards. It could be that your little one is going through this regression now and it appears from what you are saying it is definitely catnapping. Heading on toward 5-6 months also the catnapping can be a sign that your baby is starting to look to transition 3-2. THere is information on the sleep information post regarding this and how to go about adjusting for it. You can follow your baby's cues or day by day increment the awake time until it is what it needs to be at so she will not catnap any more.

With regard to the end of the day - I would not be afraid to put your baby to bed early if the stretch to the 12 hour mark is too long. Having an OT baby will also make it harder to put baby to bed at night. I put my baby to bed earlier when he was changing 3-2 and things were fine and then once he was awake long enough he went back to going to bed again 7-7.30pm.

At around this age the shush pat can also start to become ineffective. Have you started implementing PU/PD yet - using age appropriate technique?

Hope this helps.

[Chocawhit]

Thank you so much for your insight and advice I'll read more about the transition.. I only pu/pd when she is clearly upset/getting overly worked up. The ssh/pat seems to work well at getting her back to sleep. I'll consider switching to just pu/pd. When I tried it a little bit ago, it seemed to get her wound up, whereas the ssh/pat clams her down.

[ireneasheard]

They change so quickly. My boy is 6.5 months old now and he initially was good with shhh pat but around 5 months he clearly started rejecting it so I started transitioning to the PU/PD. Now at 6.5 months I do not shhh pat at all any more (in fact he hated shhh so just pat) and have been doing PU/Pd on the occasions when he does need a little help to go to sleep. So far so good, I am glad I followed his cues and started PU/PD with him.
The transition stuff is really helpful, if you look out for certain signs such as continual catnapping, resisting sleep etc often it is linked to changes in routine that are needed. I have found it helpful just going by my babe's signs but also keeping an eye on the clock and noting when he did / did not cat nap and then make an adjustment at the next sleep. Often he surprised me as he leaped up to 3 hours very quickly and in fact has done 4 hours before so he is anywhere between 3-4 hours awake now so I have to keep quite a close eye on him to see if he is tired enough to sleep. His catnapping was horrendous after he was sick at 8 weeks and 16 weeks and I had not adjusted his routine well enough to keep up with his changing needs. Just my thoughts, good luck!

PS You are doing great!

[jessmum46]

^^^great advice   I agree some more A time is probably the way forward, it sounds like your LO is tired but just not tired enough to sleep soundly.  It's not at all unusual for babies this age to have A times closer to 2h30 so don't be afraid to stretch her a bit longer and see if that helps get a longer sleep.  Also second the EBT - if you have a LO who will make up for lost sleep by adding it onto the night it can be amazing!

[Chocawhit]

Thank you everyone for your help. She did need to switch to a 2 nap schedule. She is now awake 2hrs to 2.25 hrs between naps. Our naps have gotten better, but now our 8pm wake up is worse . Every night she wakes up close to 8 and is fussy or just awake until 9 and sometimes even 10. What do I do? Husband is suggestinf I push everything back so she just goes to bed at 8 and hat sounds like a terrible idea to me.

[jessmum46]

I don't think we were suggesting she needs to go straight to 2 naps - with 2-2.25h A time she really isn't awake long enough yet to be able to handle that.  Could you post her routine now?  But I would suggest perhaps you need to add a 3rd nap (catnap) back in for now until you can get the A time to closer to 3h.  A 'standard' 2 nap routine would be:

WU 7
Nap 10-11.30
Nap 2.30-4
BT 7

[ireneasheard]

I agree with jessmum46 - From what I remember 2-2.25 hours awake was not long enough at that point to have only 2 sleeps during the day for my son anyway. We let him have a little catnap at the end of the day to get him through and I was sticking to the 4 hour cycle still. Now my son is awake over 3 hours it is 2 sleeps a day only - in fact he does a longer morning sleep and a short afternoon nap - and this is enough to get him through the day and he sleeps all night.

Our routine at the moment is as follows:

WU 7-7.30am
Sleep: 10-10.30am - this one tends to be a longer sleep, usually 2 hours.
WU: 12.00-12.30pm
Nap: 3.30pm (variations, can be a little earlier or later)
BT: 7-7.30pm.

Basically my son can stay awake currently anywhere atm between 3-4 hours easily.

Prior to this when he was awake shorter time - transitioning to 2 sleeps - it looked something like this:

WU: 7-7.30am
Sleep: 9.30-10am
WU: 11-11.30am
Sleep: 2.15-2.45pm
WU: 3.30-4.00pm
Nap (capped at only perhaps 15 minutes depending how day sleep went just to get him through until 7-7.30pm bedtime): 5-5.30pm
BT: 7-7.30pm

As he was looking to drop the 2nd sleep - as his awake time increased - the 2nd sleep started becoming a catnap. Then we could see it consolidating into a better and longer morning sleep and now he is pushing toward staying awake longer so the 2nd sleep is becoming a catnap again as you can see from our current routine.

Hope this helps a little.