E.A.S.Y for touchy reflux baby?

[Teachkindrz]

I have successfully whispered with my 2 oldest (spirited and angel) but this one has me going insane! He was late preterm at 35weeks 6days so adjusted age he is only 4 1/2 weeks (2 months). All of my babies have had reflux so I'm experienced with the techniques. He is on meds and it keeps most of it down. He can put himself to sleep for initial naps but he only sleeps 45 min at a time (except for night from 7-1am with a feed at 8 and dream feed at 10:30. After our 1am feed I'm up every hour. By the time we make it to our 5am feed I usually break down and bring him in my bed. He often skips that feed and will sleep in my arms for a couple hrs. I know its still early but I don't want to slip into things that will cause problems.

I feel I can't give him the extra time he needs to go back to sleep with naps. I've tried and it takes 30-40 min to only gain 30 more min. I home school 3x a week my others and can't keep it all up trying to  get nap Back to sleep. Its also difficult to work hard for a few days then have his schedule messed up for school pickup. I need some support/ words of encouragement from those with multiple kids and now a touchy baby. I've resorted to being OK that he puts himself to sleep, he sleeps in his own bed most of the time and wearing him after he wakes to finish his nap. Do I just do what I can and keep stocking to the basics in hopes things will get better with more time and he outgrows the reflux?

[Katet]

My thought (& based on the 2 families I know with 6+ children) is rather than focus on the routine of one child, look at the big picture of what everyone needs.

He's still little (esp with adjusted age) & so really still young to be worrying too much about a set routine of sleep. I'd be inclined to do what works best, if he wakes at 30mins & he will sleep longer if in a sling/carrier then put him in a sling & get on with what you need to with the rest of the family.

In terms of at night, unfortunately it's normal to have unsettled periods & like with my DS2 very annoying when it's at 1am rather than 5pm.

I think we live in a world that we want things "right" when we are tired & struggling with a new baby, we do have the hope "if I get the sleep right, I will be less tired" where as (this is from a BTDT) there will always be another thing that is a challenge, so trying to learn to look at what is good rather than focus on the struggles is actually a path that is easier. 

[creations]

To add to what Katet said, have you tried a W2S (wake to sleep) on the nap at the 35/45 min mark?
Here's a link - please see particularly naps option 1 where you see LO through the transition between one sleep cycle and the next.
How do I address habitual wakings? (wake-to-sleep and other methods)
Although the link says to begin patting at 30 mins and to see LO right through the transition (which is 15 min later) and for an additional 20 mins into deep sleep (total 35 min) you could experiment with doing less, especially as you say your LO is already falling to sleep independently, he might respond well to a little encouragement and support at the right time to get through the transition rather than fully waking and then you starting to try to resettle. I realise you wouldn't be able to do 35 mins with your family commitments, if there is a chance you could do 5-10 mins it could possibly still work.  When mine was much older than this I was able to do a W2S in 2 mins only - different baby, different issue, different age, but I'm just saying maybe worth a shot. If it doesn't work and he fully wakes you can still go with the sling nap