Hello and welcome to BW forums
The guidance routines for 3hr, 3.5hr and 4hr EASY are only guidance. Really the best thing for your LO is to go onto a routine which suits her as an individual and based on her A times needs (how long she needs to stay awake to get a good nap) and her E time needs (how often she needs to eat).
Refluxers very often like to eat little and often, it helps with the discomfort. You didn't say just how frequently she is eating, if it is every hour and her sleep is very disturbed I'd be considering looking at reflux meds to get it controlled. If though it is more like 2 -3 hrs and she is taking a decent feed (ie not just snacking) then that's probably what she needs to do for now.
In very hot weather you might want to offer BF more frequently.
Her A times are longer than the guidance times so I understand you saying she seems more suited to an older routine but this doesn't necessarily mean she has to eat at 4hr intervals, it's possible to work out a routine which accommodates both the A and E needs.
You can begin EASY based on your A and E times.
Is it too early for PU/PD? I was never able to make the pat/shhh work..
PUPD is a method for older babies and used as a last resort sleep training method. We always advise shush/pat or an adapted shush/pat and this is the soothing method you will return to whenever needed over the months (even years in a sense although it adapts as they get older). She is too young for PUPD anyway but also we don't advise PUPD for refluxers as it can flare up the reflux, it's kind of like shaking a soda bottle.
During shush/pat you *do* pick up if LO is very upset and you can calm completely in arms before putting down, you can keep in arms all the way to sleep in the early days of sleep training before putting down and continuing shush/pat in the cot, so you do pick up and you do put down but it is much more gentle and not guided by the strict timings of PUPD method for older babies or when used as a last resort method.
I was never able to make the pat/shhh work..
Shush/pat is not a method which stops your LO crying but rather it is a way of assuring your LO that you are still there, that she has not been abandoned, and a method which you can gently wean as your LO gains confidence and begins to self settle.
If you have been rocking rather than patting this could be used as an adaptation to the shush/pat method. Patting can sometimes be uncomfortable for refluxers, my own LO didn't really take to patting and I rocked him. I began by reducing how much I rocked in arms so it was a smaller motion and then put him down and kept a firm hand on him giving him a little jiggling rock in the cot. I found that this could be reduced and reduced just like patting is until you use just a firm hand, a lighter hand and hands off. When he needed more help I continued the firm hand rocking in the cot then eased off again. You might want to adapt like this.
- Recently tends to take very short naps (30/40 mins)
This can be for a few reasons, for example:
- if she was sleeping longer naps before AND has been on this A time of 1hr 45 for a while then it could be she is ready for an additional 15 mins A time - you can try it and see over a few days if her naps improve in length
- unable to transition between sleep cycles. If she has not learned to self settle for sleep it can be very hard to transition at the end of a sleep cycle so instead LO fully wakes. you can shush/pat (or adapted) from 30 mins for 20 mins to see if she can move into another cycle. This is called W2S (wake to sleep). Sleep training would help resolve this.
- too hot so at the end of a cycle she fully wakes to let you know she's hot
- discomfort so at the end of a cycle she fully wakes because the reflux bothers her
- 4 month regression. This is a period of time when very many LOs day time sleep seem to get worse even for those who are independent sleepers. Often 4-6 months. Mine started his at 3.5 months and finished at 5.5 months (however I also got reflux meds at 5.5 months so chances are it was also discomfort).
I'm very worried she could get dehydrated
You must always do what you feel is right for your baby. Books and sleep training methods can help, forums can offer support but the long and short of it is she is YOUR baby, and you make the decisions. Take from parenting books/methods/forums what is helpful and supportive for you and your LO, leave behind what is not. Try not to worry about accidental parenting too much, if you create props they can be fixed and we are here whenever you are ready to do that. We have members of the community who started EASY from birth as a routine but did not sleep train until LO was much older, we have members who have not found the forums or wanted to sleep train until LO is a toddler - whenever it is right for you.
If you'd like to shift to a more predictable routine you can begin with a couple of days observation then post the EAS time here and I'll have a look for you and see what to suggest as a routine starting point.
If you are ready to sleep train there is also support for you in these forums
